Fifty Shades Red
by StarshipLight
Summary: (Cont. after E.L James book 1) Heartbroken Ana manages to avoid Christian Grey for a year after they broke up. A night out with Kate forces the two to see each other again, what will become of them? (Still in the making, chapter by chapter)
1. Chapter 1

**Hi, welcome to my Fifty Shades of Grey Fan Fiction.  
This is my story of what happens after the first book.**

 **Thank you for taking the time to read,**  
 **and for letting me know what you think!**

 **I am working with the wonderful dontcare89 as my beta,**  
 **we are currently going through and editing the chapters spelling and grammar.**

 **Chapter One Songs:**  
 **"Impossible Year"- Panic! At The Disco  
"I Hate You, I Love You"- gnash**

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Today marks the day before the one year anniversary of me walking out on Christian Grey. My stomach knots thinking about him still. His face, etched in my mind. His smile… the man who took not only my virginity but my heart. I still feel a hollowness when I think about him too long, so I try to stay busy at my job at SIP but my boss Mr. Jack Hyde is making me more and more uncomfortable. No man has made me even look in their direction since Christian and I doubt I'll even love another the same; but life goes on and I am trying my best to do that. I look in my bedroom mirror at my long, wavy brown hair and blue eyes, too big for my face. My frame is slightly smaller than even a few months ago. All I see is a ghost in front of me. A knock at the door startles me.

"Ana?" It's Kate. She's been tiptoeing around me all year about her relationship with Elliot. She knows it pains me to see them together and though I am happy for her, I just can't bear to be around them. It aches. The memories ache too much.

"Come in." I say. She slowly opens the door. Without saying a word, she slowly walks in and sits on my bed, cross-legged and just looks at me with those big eyes. I love her to death. Even if she is dating my ex-boyfriend's brother.

"Before you say no..." She sighs and puts her hand up to stop me from saying anything. "My dad got me tickets to the gala and I want to bring you as my date. You need to get out. Look at you, you frail little thing. It pains me to still see you like this. I'll take you shopping and we can even go get our hair and nails done. Come on Steele. Before you say no, just say yes. It will be fun. Snow Patrol will be there!"

"Why not bring Elliot?" Why wouldn't she want to bring her boyfriend? I will probably be a downer all night.

"Because I love you more, silly! And I want to dress you up," she giggles.

I huff at her and realize that she really has been there as much as she could be this last year; well at least as much as I have let her. If going to this ball will make her happy, who am I to say no? "Okay... on one condition." She mouths 'what?' to me and sighs loudly.

"You let me pick the dress," I laugh. It feels good to laugh with her. She jumps up and down, clapping her hands and giggling.

"This is going to be so much fun!" She jumps off the bed and embraces me in one of her famous Kate hugs.

"It's tomorrow night. Sooo... let's go shopping." She grabs my hand and leads me out of the room ignoring my shocked look.

"Thanks for the heads up!" I yell as we grab our purses and head to the nearest boutique. It's been a while since I have really enjoyed myself or enjoyed spending time out. My schedule usually goes sleep, work, eat a small meal, work, force myself to eat something small, sleep, and repeat. It feels good to get out with Kate and actually relax even as excitement pours from her.

"Oh my god, this is going to be great. You are going to look hot! I already scheduled our hair appointment for tomorrow at noon. After we get ready we must leave the house by 5 if we want to be on time. We have good seats." She winks at me. Soon we reach a place called Sallé Beau; it's a quiet little salon but far out of my price range, that's for sure. I stop at the doorway.

"Umm...Kate...this place is expen..." She cuts me off.

"No way, Steele. My treat; this is more fun for me...believe me. Seeing you smile...is priceless Ana." I can't argue with her; seeing her this happy is actually making me happy. We spend hours trying on dresses. Each dress looks flattering on Kate and she could pull off anything but she settles on a navy blue mermaid dress with a strapless sweetheart neckline. It's satin and hugs her in all the right ways.

"Wow, Kate, you look breathtaking." I gape at her. "Are you sure you don't want to take Elliot? I would hate for him to miss a chance to see you like this." I laugh at her. She rolls her eyes at me.

"Come on, let's find you a dress. It's here somewhere." She goes and changes into her regular clothes in record time and the attendant takes her dress. We spend some more time looking and soon she comes back to me with this look.

"I found it. I know you said you wanted to pick it, but Anastasia. This is you. Please." She gives me the puppy lip. "It's in your dressing room."

"I'll try it but I do not agree to anything yet," I giggle. I walk back to the room and close the door. Inside hangs a long, red dress. Ohh that red. The bottom is chiffon that cuts off just under the ribs by a band of red and the rest is mesmerizing. A mixture of lace on clear chiffon fabric. It's meant to give the illusion that the lace in actually on the skin. It has long sleeves with spaced out delicate lace and the neckline dips down to between the breasts that are covered in large areas of beaded lace. I have to admit; it's beautiful but revealing. I look at the price tag and nearly faint. Oh Kate. I put it on and it's a perfect fit. If it was white it could be a wedding gown. The red really goes nicely with my long, brown hair. I slowly open the door and I hear Kate.

"Drum roll, please." She pats her thighs rhythmically to create a tapping sound. I step out and she stops, looking at me with her mouth gaping open. "It's perfect. You have to pick this one."

"I hate it." I say. Her mouth drops to the floor. "Just kidding. I love it. It's perfect but it's too much money, Kate. I'll have to pay you back." I say.

"Stop it, silly. Go change. We have to get shoes and our beauty sleep." She laughs and walks off to the checkout area. I walk back to the dressing room to switch out of the 3 thousand dollar dress.

The next day goes by fast. We go get manicures and pedicures first thing in the morning and we eat brunch at a small café down the street. It feels like old times and I enjoy it as much as I can but I know once the gala is over, things will go back to what they were. Work. Eat. Sleep. I frown.

"The last touch," she says as we stand in our living room, ready to walk out the door and applying my last touch of makeup; matching red lipstick. She's walking towards me with a rectangular box.

"What is this?" I ask and put my purse down. She hands me the box and I open it to find a matching red eye mask.

"Mine's white. I couldn't find blue. But when I saw this I couldn't resist. I forgot to tell you; it's a Masquerade. Well, actually, I just wanted to surprise you. But isn't it perfect? Come here. Let me put it on you." She pulls it out of the box and puts it on my face; it's comfortable.

"So why'd we spend so much time putting makeup on if we are just covering our faces." I laugh and recall the last few hours. My hair is looking full and healthy after a much needed cut. It hangs in large curls down to my butt if I tip my head back a little. I'm thankful Kate talked me into keeping it long. I almost cut it off, thinking a change would be nice but I will always love my long hair and bangs. Kate looks gorgeous when I turn around and see her with her with lacy, beaded mask. It looks perfect with her dress.

"Because you might meet a cute boy and go off with him and you'll want to look beautiful when you take your mask off, silly." She buckles her white shoes. I put on black, small heels. Kate ensures we will be dancing and drinking so no high heels for me.

"No boys for me. I'm sworn off of them for a long time." I put my hands up in defeated motion.

"You say that now." She says and we walk out the door to a waiting limo. "Daddy." She smiles back at me. "He wanted to make sure we arrived in style." She holds my hand as we walk down the path to the limo. Once inside, we pop a bottle of champagne and drink about half the bottle before we get to the ball. I'm thankful for the drinks because now I'm not so nervous. We get out and are greeted by a friendly, old man in a suit who walks with us up to the entrance door. Kate squeals. "This is going to be so much fun!" She claps her hands in excitement. We walk through the door and I'm amazed. It's beautiful inside. People are walking up a huge staircase in front of us, up to where the real action is.

"I can not believe Snow Patrol is here." I say to Kate, our arms are linked together, taking everything in. The room is large with accents of gold and the ceiling is a dome with paintings of angels and seas. I feel like I am being watched.

"And other celebrities and famous people. Maybe we will run into George Clooney!" She squeals as we make our way up the steps together. We whisper back and forth about all the people we spot. We shriek a few times and probably look like little girls. She makes walking in a mermaid dress up the stairs look flawless compared to some people. You would think she does this in her sleep. I'm thankful for my spacious dress, though I feel over exposed but covered.

"I wonder who we are sitting with." I say to her. She looks down at me and gives me a half smile that doesn't match her eyes.

"Hope it's not the Kardashians." She says quietly and lets out a chuckle. I laugh with her. We giggle some more and enter the main room. It's elegant: people are bustling about under the high ceiling domes with large crystal chandeliers that glisten in the light just right. "It's amazing." Kate says so quietly, I almost don't hear her. We walk around for a while looking at all the detail of the space. Looking at other women in dresses that don't do much for their bodies. Kate puts them all to shame.

"Kate?!" I hear from beside us. My heart drops. Mia Grey. I would recognize her anywhere, mask or no mask. She looks dashing in a light pink halter neck dress that swoops to the floor with a matching, light pink mask. She chats with Kate for a split second before her eyes catch mine. "Ana? Is that really you? I have missed you so much." She embraces me tightly and I hug her back. If she's here, does that mean all of the Greys are?

"You look fantastic. Both of you. Ana... it's so good to see you. I'm glad Kate convinced you to come. You look breathtaking, wait till Chris.." She stops and so does what's left of my heart. He's here. I'm in the same room as him. Is he watching me now?

"I should leave." I turn to leave and both Kate and Mia grab my arms.

"No, no, no." They say together. "I told you getting her to come was the easy part. Getting her to stay is the hard part." Kate says to Mia.

"You tricked me." I accuse her. I can't believe her audacity.

"No, I just wanted you to get out and I had an extra ticket. It just so happens they are also invited too. Please don't be mad; maybe you won't see him at all. It's a masquerade. He won't even recognize you and you won't recognize him. There are so many men in the same matching suits." She says. Maybe she's right but if he sees me with them he will know it's me for sure.

"If he sees me with you guys... he will know it's me. Especially in this dress." My cheeks flush. "And this is already awkward enough. Please, I should go." They both give me a look.

"It's been a year, Ana. You're gonna see him at my wedding if I marry Elliot. He's going to be around if you're around me and I'm with Elliot. I don't want to lose my best friend, okay? Please, just... see how it goes. Maybe this will be closure." Kate says. I love her to death but I'm almost about to walk out the damn door no matter how expensive a dress or how much time I spent putting on my makeup or any of it. I look into her beautiful eyes that stick out through her white mask.

"Fine, but I need another drink." I say. Mia giggles.

"Coming right up." She says.

"I hate you right now." I mouth to Kate. She mouths back, 'I know'.

"Kate, baby, I'd recognize that ass anywhere." Comes a booming voice from beside us. Elliot comes up and slaps Kate's ass. Loud and people are looking. He's obviously already been drinking. "You look... Wowzaa" his eyes are about to bulge out of his head.

"Likey, Likey?" Kate asks and does a twirl.

"Oh, yeah." And he scoops her to his side with one arm and gives her a big kiss. I miss being kissed. They stop kissing and Kate turns her attention to me.

"Doesn't Ana look amazing?" Kate asks and uses her hand to scale me up and down. I blush red. I feel it.

"You look beautiful, Ana. Absolutely beautiful. My brother dun fucked up." He says. "He has never been the same." His words hurt me. Never the same? My fifty. Not your fifty any more Ana, you walked out a year ago. You made that choice. I shake my subconscious off.

"Nice to see you too, Elliot." I give him a slight wave.

"Wine!" Mia pops up from behind me with two glasses of wine. I grab one and down it fast. She looks at me, eyes wide, and hands me the other one. No questions asked. After a moment of silence we both laugh.

"Liquid courage." I say and giggle. Her eyes dart past me and back to me quick. Giving me a friendly smile. I look behind me and back but see nothing but a crowd of people. I down the other glass, my body tingling a little. I leave Elliot and Kate, holding each other in a lovers embrace. I walk around with Mia for awhile meeting celebrities and tasting all of the food we see. We danced, we drank, we listened to Snow Patrol. Kate and I even slow danced for awhile… I was trying to avoid any grey eyes and I have, successfully. Many men tried to talk to me but I avoided anyone in a suit and Mia helped with that. Besides George Clooney. I finally met him! But Kate was off with Elliot doing who knows what so only Mia and I got to meet him so she will be disappointed. I am happy to have successfully avoided Christian.

"I need air." I say to Mia when I'm tired and pretty drunk and can barely walk. I knew I should have stopped but I couldn't stop thinking about running into Christian. Together, we exit the grand room and walk down the stairs to out the front. The air cold and crisp.

"How are you getting home?" She asks.

"We have a li... limo." I stutter. My feet hurt so badly.

"I don't think Kate is ready to leave Ana. Let's go find her and ask."

"She has melliot. I'm sure herff take care of him." I manage to get out. I have no idea what I'm trying to say.

"Christian would never forgive me for letting you out of my sight like this. Let Taylor or Sawyer take you home. Please." She says. When she says Taylor's name my heart drops a little bit.

"No, that's okay." That would be awkward.

"Where's the ticket?"

"Wiff Kate. Shit." I say. Kate has our Limo ticket. Mia grabs me by the arm and we go back inside to look for Kate. The stairs were hard to get up but I managed and when we get to the top, Snow Patrol is still singing. They slowed their music down for the night and Kate and Elliot are out on the dance floor. Holding each other close. So in love. I stand there and envy it.

"Come on, let's go ask her where her purse is. You need to get home. Worst case, I will take Kate home." Mia says. We walk out onto the dance floor and approach Kate and Elliot. I feel bad for interrupting such an intimate moment. Embarrassed to watch their love, I sway to the music while Mia and Kate talk. I'm so drunk I don't understand what they are saying.

"Already?" Kate says and looks at me.

"She drank a lot. Sorry." Mia shrugs at Kate, like I need a babysitter.

"I'll have another." I say boldly, their eyes widen. "Kidding." I put my hands up.

"Anastasia?" Suddenly the voice startles me from behind and Mia and Kate stop talking and look behind me. I'm afraid to turn around, my head is spinning and I kind of want to vomit right now. I slowly turn, trying hard to focus on my legs not giving out.

"Hmm?" I'm about to give this person an attitude because I don't think I can stand another mysterious man in a mask asking me for a dance. My heart stops and I am left speechless. My eyes set upon the grayest eyes I have ever seen. His copper hair hangs slightly over the top of his mask. He towers over my small frame and I instantly become intoxicated by his familiar scent. His eyes look at me from head to toe. I see him looking at every patch of open skin. He smirks before his mouth parts a little and I watch him inhale.

"Dance with me?" He asks and puts his hand out. I look over to Mia who has a worried look on her face, probably waiting for my reaction.

"Be right back, Ana." She says, making her way to where Kate left her stuff. I slowly look back at Christian.

"I don't think that's a good idea." I sputter. Swaying a little, my head spins. He gets closer and puts his hand on the small of my back and pulls me in. My head dips a little from the heaviness of the wine. Surprisingly, his hand on my back makes me feel weightless but the heat from his body sends me spiraling out of control in my head. Holy hell, you're dancing with Christian. He starts swaying a little and I lean into him. I wish I could see his whole face but part of me is glad I can't. I don't think I could take it. He leans down and whispers in my ear.

"You look like breathtaking. This color is beautiful on you," he says. My heart flutters as I pull back and look up at him.

"You sssirrr," I emphasized the slur on my sir, "have no play... stay... say. Dammit!" I mutter and shake my head. My mind and mouth are on two totally different wave lengths. "I need to go," I say and push off him. I turn and try to walk but stumble a little into Mia's arms, surprised that she is right behind me.

"I'll take Ana home, her limo is waiting."

"I'm on my way out, let me see to it that she gets home safe. You can give the valet ticket back to Kate. You enjoy the rest of your night, Mia." He says to her and tips his head.

"He is not a man you say no to, Mia. I would know," I hiccup. Christian shoots me a surprised look and Mia laughs into my shoulder.

"I like drunk Ana." She laughs. I look over to Kate. She's giggling in Elliot's arms. Suddenly his warm hand is on my side and his other is holding my hand.

"Come on, Anastasia, I will get you home." I almost pass out when he says my name again. We get to the top of the grand staircase and my head spins.

"I need to sit." Trying my hardest to speak clearly.

"I'll carry you." He offers.

"No. That's not good." I say. I shake my head to try to get my words right.

"Don't argue with me, Anastasia." And I honestly don't want to argue and I really don't want to walk. And I love to hear my name on his lips. Oh those lips. I miss those lips. But he probably found another sub and is happy back to his dominant lifestyle.

"Go home to yer sub." I say, instantly regretting it as his mouth slightly parts open. "I don't wanna know." I put my hand up.

"Will you always be so defying?" His eyes narrow and his posture serious.

"Why is the room spinning?" I ask when I finally have the courage to look into his gray eyes. Just then my legs give out and he catches me in his arms; the place I have dreamed about over the last year. It's warm and I feel featherless. I rest my head against his chest and he doesn't flinch, instead pulls me closer. I close my eyes and inhale his scent. After tonight he will be gone again and my hole will be torn back open. I feel him walking and then the cool air from outside hits my exposed skin. I shiver and Christian gives me a light squeeze. With my eyes shut, my subconscious slowly slips into a drunken sleep.

 **edited by: dontcare89**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi everyone! I am blown away by all the responses I received from only my first chapter!  
Both negative and positive I want people to understand Im not trying to replace  
the books, I am just a 25 y.o. mom of two small boys who works a full time night job and loves to write.  
I do not claim to be a pro at this, I just want to share my ideas and hope to make people smile.  
Iv had a small obsession with Fifty and for a long time I put off writing this, and I am mad at myself now for waiting so long.**

 **I had someone say what type of friend is Kate to let Christian take Ana home... Well in the first book she  
let him take her home from the bar and then he was just a stranger to her, all so she could be with Elliot.  
It was kinda like that here.**

 **Now I am going to go back to Chapter one and fix my mistakes! I was so unsure if I  
should post it that I didn't prof it very well, and for that I apologize :( Im sure you will encounter more hiccups I overlooked in the future.**

 **Thank you for all the overwhelming support to all you other Grey lovers! Your reviews are what encourage me  
that I need to keep going! And I will, oh I will!**

 **Keep reviewing and reading as I continue this adventure!  
Thank you all! I love all my devoted readers -A**

* * *

I wake up in a haze. I am far to comfortable to be in my own bed and it's still dark out. My head is full of clouds of fuzz. I should not have drank that much so fast, I have to remember how much of a lightweight I am. My body slightly tingles throughout with the alcohol remaining in my system. Surprisingly I'm not dizzy so I pull myself together and focus my eyes. I look around and realize I'm not in my room... Oh no. No. No. No. No he didn't?! I swore last night, seeing him there,and the dance... were all a dream. I look down and I'm still wearing my dress, though my shoes have been removed and on the nightstand is my mask. The alarm reads 3am. You better get up and leave. The dim light from a nearby wall lamp illuminates the familiar room, the subs room. My heart drops. I need to find my purse and leave. I get up but pause in front of the window. The view from here is still as magnificent as it was in what seems like a lifetime ago, the city lights twinkling under the gods castle in the sky. I need to find my phone and call Kate, she is in big trouble. Mia too. I find it on the floor next to my shoes. How did he get my purse? How did we get here? I pull out my phone and text Kate.

*You are in big trouble Katherine!*

I put my phone back in my purse. I shouldn't be here, the hollow part of my chest opens a little as memories flood in. I let out a small gasp. Where is he? I tip toe to the door, if he hears me he will come up here. I can't bare to see him. I creek the door open and it's completely silent, but I still stop and wait for a few second before emerging into the hallway. My eyes fall to the play rooms door but I force myself to look away. Part of me even wants to look inside the forbidden door but I know I must keep moving and get out of here. What if he has a girl bound and gagged waiting for him in there... the pain aches on in my heart... No Ana, it will only make things worse. Let it rest. I slowly reach up and touch the door, keeping my eyes shut I feel the wood on my fingers. I flinch. He hurt you, he will do it again. He needs that. Leave.

I head to the top of the steps but stop before making it down two. I see him standing in front of the windows that outline the flickering skyline, his hands crossed behind his back, his feet slightly parted. Pondering. I'm thankful he is facing away from me so I can't see his face yet. I study his stance. How he is just watching the city below, safe in his tower in the sky just how he likes it. Secluded from the world. He could have anything he wants... at one time it was me... He won't change Ana. I let out a long breath I have been holding, he slowly turns and looks at me. How did her hear that? When his eyes meet mine, I instantly feel like sinking to my knees. He's still in a white dress shirt with his sleeves rolled up, his tie off, and the top two buttons of his shirt undone. His pants fit him like a glove. He is as perfect as my memories.

"You shouldn't be out of bed Anastasia. I wouldn't be surprised if you're still drunk. You put yourself at risk tonight." He says and starts walking towards me. I'm frozen in place watching him move with such grace across the room to the bottom step. Before he makes another move I put my hand up to stop him. He freezes when his foot hit the first step and just looks at me. His eyes widen.

"Mmm. Mmmm." I shake my head at him. Whoa, dizzy. "Do not come any closer. Why did you bring me here Christian? I had a way home. I am not your responsibility." I try to keep myself steady, maybe I should lay down but in my own bed. "Please, I want to go home." His face is heartbreakingly beautiful and sad. The remaining wine in my system gives me a little courage to speak my mind.

"Why? I want you here." He says. He takes another step up.

"Please, this is hard enough. You should not have brought me here, it's been a year and... and it hurts me to see you honestly." I can feel tears welling in the corner of my eyes. "How do you know I dont have a boyfriend that will kick your ass for kidnapping me?" His lets out a small chuckle, probably more at the idea of someone actually beating him up. Which would never happen, just look at him Steele. Nice Lie.

"Where was he tonight then when your falling over drunk?" He says and raises an eyebrow.

"He uh.." I stop, he moves up another step, my heart stops.

"Thats what I thought." He shakes his head. He knows i'm lieing. "You think it doesn't hurt me to see you?" He says, "When I saw you there tonight... I couldn't believe it. I didn't believe Kate would actually convince you to come. I almost refused to go, now I'm glad I didn't. I'm guessing she didn't tell you we would be there." He takes another step. "At first I thought I was dreaming because of how beautiful you look. How beautiful you always look. I wanted to come to you then but I was warned not to interfere so that you would have a night out. But I don't listen. I run on my own set of rules, you know that. So I promised myself not to get close unless you needed me. And you did." He takes another step up and eyes me up and down. Im tempted to throw my shoes and purse that are in my hand at him to stop him from walking up any more steps.

"I was perfectly fine Christian. I can handle myself. I don't need a babysitter when I drink. I have had plenty of nights out since our last encounter." I lie to him. He doesn't need to know how hard this year has been for me, how hard it's been to move on.

He cocks his head to the side, "Really? How come your body language tells me that is not true." I look away, I'm lightheaded so I grab onto the railing to steady myself, he takes notice and makes his way up a few more steps. "Then I was furious because I saw the way the other men were gawking at you. I don't blame them, you look like a red goddess." He shakes his head and stops about 5 steps under me. Being this close and clearer of mind makes me realize how intoxicating he is. "I watched you stumble outside with Mia and I almost intervened then but I saw you two come back in." He is now the step under me. I feel his heat close to my body. Penetrating the openings between lace. His smell of body wash and Christian. I close my eyes and inhale. Causing me to loose balance for a second, he catches my elbows and hold me still.

"Can you have Taylor take me home? I'm not feeling well. I would like to sleep in my own bed. Not my ex-boyfriends submissive's bed. Thanks." I say and I try to walk around him and down the stairs but he hold me in place.

"Ana, please. We need to talk. But when your completely sober, okay? And I rather you didn't leave until we did. Plus, I can't take my eyes off you in this dress. You should always be in fine things." He runs his one hand through some of my hair by my elbow. "You look far to thin. You need to eat."

I push his hand out of my hair and he stops, shocked. "I am not your sub or girlfriend or whatever you want to call it. I do not have to listen to you. Please Christian, we have absolutely nothing to talk about. You've moved on. End of story." His face is hard to read. He frowns pulls his other hand to around my back and pulls me into a warm embrace. Because I'm on a stair higher my head is on his shoulder and he's holding me tight to him to his chest.

"I never moved on." He whispers in my ear. My legs turn into jelly. He hasn't moved on either? I still can't be here, I need to leave. But I can enjoy his embrace for a few seconds. I visibly relax in his arms and he squeezes me a little tighter. His hot breath on my neck. I suddenly have a sinking feeling in my stomach.

"You must of found another submissive Christian." I pull back and look at his beautiful face, he's even more attractive than I remember. Oh boy Steele. Calm your self. A sudden heat pools in between my legs. "You have needs, ya know? The reason I left. I don't know why Kate would of brought me tonight. Your right, if I would of known you were gonna be there I wouldn't of went because it's none of her business. I have spent the past year trying to avoid anything that has to do with her and Elliot. We spend some time together during holidays and she always invites me along to do things but she should of got the hint that I cut you completely out of my life. All the Greys out of my life. I couldn't even tell her the reason we broke up was cause you like to punish me with belts in your red room of pain." His eyes lock onto mine. "If I wanted to see you I would of called."

"But you didn't call." He says. Almost sad sounding. Don't pity him Ana. He's a monster and it will never work.

"Because its over and I deleted your contact. You wanted more of one thing, I wanted more of another, it was never going to work Christian." I say. God my head is fuzzy. I put my hand up to my head to still it and Christian stiffens instantly.

"You need rest. Please, let me take you back to bed and we can talk in the morning." He says. Being this close to him makes anything he says hard to resist. Stand strong Ana.

"Me and you and a bed. No thanks. My bed with me alone. Yes." I can't let him know exactly how much being here is killing me. Or how much I do want him to take me to bed. I need to remember what is behind his perfect face. I know once I'm home alone and the realization that I was even here again will cause my heart to ache like a fresh wound.

"As much of the thought of going to bed WITH you pleases me, I want you to go rest." He says.

"At my own home, I will." I huff and cross my arms.

"Why must you always be so stubborn?" He growls and rolls his eyes. "If you won't go to bed then come sit down."

"I am not yours to boss around. I don't even know why I'm here, why AM I here?" I say. Calmly uncrossing my arms. He slowly let's go of my elbows and leans away a little bit. Looking at me with his glossy gray eyes, they pierce my heart.

"I haven't been with anyone since you. When you left it was like my whole world came crashing down. Since, I have focused all my energy into my company. Completely emerging myself into my work. Im an even more wealthier man than I was a year ago. I tried to distract myself of everything you. I too avoided Kate and Elliot. She always seemed to bring you up." He shakes his head in a disapproval type of way. "YOU ARE right for me. And you made me realize that the moment you walked out that door, that this..." He grabs my small hands in his. Being on this step and being able to so clearly see his eyes I can see he showing me the softer side of him. "... you... showed me love when I least deserved it. You had compassion for me. It was... foreign. I had never let any of my previous submissives get close. But Anastasia, you were never my submissive, I always wanted to show you more because it felt right but I just didn't know how. As you stand here in my house I can't help but think this is a dream. Iv had dreams of something similar. Your face..." He cups both my hands into one of his and reaches his other hand up and cups my cheek. I almost shy away but when I feel his warmth, I haven't felt this in so long. I welcome it. I close my eyes and lean into his hand. His thumb stroking under my eye. Ahh, this feels so good. "Your face is edged in my mind. How Iv missed your soft skin. Your beautiful blue eyes. The blush of your cheeks." I thought he was going to kiss me and I wanted to make sure he didn't. My heart couldn't take his perfect soft lips on mine.

"Elliot said you haven't been the same." I say.

"I haven't." He says so low it's almost a whisper. I open my eyes and just look at him. "This is so nice on you." His eyes look down my slender frame.

"You really have had no one? Not even Mrs. Robinson?" I frown at him, and the thought of him turning to her once I left. I shiver.

"No. What a ridicules thought." He says. "Are you cold? Come sit down, I'll grab you a blanket." He then leads me down the stairs. Holding my hand gently to make sure I don't fall. When we reach the bottom he takes my purse and shoes from my hand and I open my mouth to object.

"Tomorrow you can run for the hills if you want after we talk, but for tonight can we please just be civil. One friend taking care of another." He says. He's so genuine.

"Okay. But don't try anything funny." I wave my finger at him.

He puts his hand up in defeat. "No funny business here." He leads me to the couch and I sit down, he disappears into his room. Once again thankful for my roomy dress. I couldn't get comfortable with a dress like Kate's that's for sure. He comes back with a large black velvet blanket. He lays in over my lap and proceeds to start a fire. He's a pleasure to watch in whatever task he is doing, he does with such grace. Once the fire is at the right height and Christian is satisfied with it, turns his attention back to me. His eyes don't leave mine and he sits on the other end of the couch. He leans back with his ankle hooked over his knee and his fingers rubbing his lips, just watching me. I feel the need to lay down so I break gaze watch the flame to dim down the "friend" intensity I feel under his gaze.

"It's quiet up here." I say. Trying to break the tension.

"That's why I like it so much." I still don't break away from looking at the fire. The mixture of the heat filling the room and the soft velvet blanket is making my eyes heavy. All I can hear is the crackling of the flame. Peaceful. "You really are the most beautiful sight to behold Miss. Steele." He says in such a tone that would make any girl melt into a puddle. A puddle of tears when you get home. "You really should sleep."

"I rather stay awake till your ready to take me home."

"What are you afraid I'm going to do?" He says. His palm is probably twitching.

"I just rather not get to comfortable." I say, I break my gaze and look at him. His eyes narrowed, looking at me with depth. "You know, since I'm not staying." He needs to realize I'm not coming back. I can't. Why, so he can leave YOU once he realizes he needs control and your a free spirit. I look back at the fire and my eyes heavy, almost blacking out the entire flame from my vision. I suddenly feel a warmth beside me. Christian has slid in next to me under the blanket. We now sit side by side, watching the flame, his arm behind my head on the back of the couch. I don't know if I should move or just accept it and use him as a pillow.

"This does not mean anything." I say, before I shift and move down a bit, met by his wondering gaze, and then lay my head down in his lap. He stills for a second and then shifts to cover me with the blanket. He leans back and his hand finds my hair, he lightly rubs my scalp, ohh that feels so good. I fall fast asleep to Christian playing with my hair faster than I can tell him to stop.

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 **Thank you all so much for the reviews!**


	3. Chapter 3

**I personally like Dominant Bossy Christian, so there will be lots of that. Sorry, not sorry ;)  
** **Also lots of soft side!**

 **I understand people might not like my story, and I have had some major negative messages and  
comments but I will push forward for all those who want to read my take and  
because I just love this fairy tale story.**

 **Thank you for all then positive reviews! I love them and you guys are awesome!** **s  
Enjoy chapter 3 :)**

 **I wont usually update every day but Iv had a few days off to write.  
Please enjoy! xx-A**

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Im much to warm. It overwhelms me before I even open my eyes. I'm to hot. I push the blanket off me and then my mind and my eyes finally put it together that I'm still at Christians apartment. I sit up and take a fast look around, giving me a sudden throbbing in my head so I focus on the window in front of me. The sky outside is grey and its raining. The sound of the rain hitting the window is a constant soothing sound, it's all I hear, no cars beeping or people busting about. Like outside my place. It's just... rain. I listen for a second before reality hits, I then rush to grab my shoes and purse, Christian is no were to be seen. Maybe I can leave before he sees that I'm up. Quietly I tuck my purse under my arm and clutch onto my shoes. I tip toe to the elevator door and do a quick look around before pressing the button. I want to make sure Taylor isn't near by, or Gail.

It's dings and I get in, praying no one heard it. I watch intently till the door fully closes, waiting for Christian to pop out. But nothing. The door seals shut and I let out the breath iv been holding and sigh. That was close. I sag against the back wall and open my purse for my phone. It's eight in the morning. I scroll through to see no new messages. I decide to call Jose.

"Ana! It's great to hear from you! How are you?" He says, I haven't talked to him in about a month. He's been so busy with his photography that he is rarely home and I have not been a very good friend to him this last year. We seldom see each other. Only when he comes over to the apartment and makes me spend time with him.

"Jose, I need you to come get me. I... Umm.. ended up at Christians last night and I just snuck out and left. I don't know who else to call." I say. I hear him gasp and I lower my head in shame. How am I going to explain this to him. "You know where Escala is right? Umm... Meet me at the cafe one block away. I'll watch for you, you can't miss me. I'm wearing red."

"I'm on my way Ana. I'll meet you in about 5 minutes, Im actually driving through the city now so its perfect timing you called. I just went to your apartment looking for you, we need to talk, I'll see you in a few minute." He says.

"Thank you Jose. Your a life savor." I doubt I can outrun him for even 15 minutes. Specially dressed like this out on the streets of Seattle. The elevator dings open at the lobby. I step out and make a bee line for the door. I run through the lobby, thankful for only the attendant behind the desk. He looks at me quickly and I swear he laughs. I lower my head and walk out into the rain. It's light, but I instantly feel cold and wet. I'm a mess in my full dress from last night, makeup smeared on my face probably. And without shoes. It's looks like I'm doing the walk of shame. Which I am, shamed at myself for ending up there. Ugh, how could I have let him so easily have control over me.

 _People are staring._

I make a fast run for the cafe. Praying that Christen hasn't sent his hounds looking for me yet. I dodge the looks from the strangers in the street. Trying to hide my face with my arm, but I'm hard to not look at. Each second last 1000 second. Waiting for him to find me, or Taylor.

What would I even say to him, oh hey I want to date you only if you don't beat me? Oh yeah, a man who could have the whole world would want me. He has his needs and I'm not willing to give up things to meet his. No. Has he really not moved on?

Just then my phone rings. I don't stop my pace but I open my purse and look to see, maybe Jose is lost. It's Christian, Do I answer? No. _Yes, tell him to go away._ I hit answer.

"Anastasia. Where are you going?" He says. His voice almost panic stricken.

"Christen, I stayed the night with you like you wanted. What more do you want?" I say.

"I want to talk to you, please." He says. I reach the coffee shop and to my surprise Jose is waiting for me in his new truck, I remember Kate told me about it but at the time I honestly didn't care. The thought of how crappy of a friend iv been makes me cringe. I lock eyes with Jose, whose mouths "whoa" to me. I must look crazy.

"There is nothing to talk about." I say.

"I want you back." He says. My heart stops. And Jose beckons for me to get in the truck, waving his hand. "Do you think the photographer is a better suit for you?" I whip around looking for him but I don't see anything. But he obviously sees me.

"He's just a friend." I justify to him. _Why?_

"Come back to my place with me. Please." He says. What do I do? I look at Jose who is confused as hell and he keeps waving for me to hop in, I take another look around me. My body cold and soaked. The dress is weighing down in the rain and my exposed skin tingles with the slight chill.

"You said I can't love you and you don't know how to love. How will we ever make that work Christen? I need love." I say. My heart pounding out of my chest, I need to use the bathroom, and Jose is waiting for me but so is Christian.

"But I do love you." He says. I almost drop the phone out of my hand. He loves me? _No._

"You love the idea of me." I say. I turn and walk to Jose who leans over and opens the passenger door as I get closer. Then I hear it, both through the phone and throw the echos off the buildings in Seattle.

"ANA!" He must be close. A desperate plea for a forbidden type of love. I press end in the phone and I jump in the truck.

"Let's get out of here please!" I cry to him. He steps on it, pulls into traffic and Escala in my passenger mirror. I throw my phone, my shoes and purse on the floor and I let out a sob. A deep sob I have been holding in since the moment I saw him. Jose does nothing but reaches over and holds my hand to comfort me but keeping an eye on both the road and the rear-view mirrors. He is smart not to ask questions and to let me just cry. He really is a good friend, I don't see how Christian thinks he has more intentions.

We we arrive to my apartment complex he does a quick look around, "It looks clear Ana." The ride felt all to quick for me to be done crying. When Jose parks the truck I finally look over to him and frown, remember I am soaked from head to toe.

"I'm sorry for getting your truck wet and making you come get me." I sniffle and very lady unlike I wipe my nose on the back of my hand. My eyes are soar and my body is weak. I need to cry more. My heart aches. I haven't even registered everything from last night, it seemed dream like.

"Oh Ana, it's okay. Anytime." He smile at me. "I can see now is not the time to talk but do you want me to come in and keep you company?" He says. Giving my hand a small squeeze.

"Yeah, that would be nice. Keep me from killing Kate when I see her." I weakly smile at him. He looks confused for a second but brushes it off. He hops out of the truck and over to my side, very gentlemen like helps me out of the truck and tucks me under his shoulder to shield me from wondering eyes and the rain, event though I am already soaked. But some passer-bys still stair but I don't care. I just want to shower and sleep. We reach the apartment and Jose doesn't stop lingering around me as I make a cup of tea in the kitchen.

"Do you need anything?" He asks softly. Even though the gesture is kind, I'm starting to become annoyed really fast. Maybe I should just be alone. I don't even finish making my tea before I decide I need some space.

"You know what, I just want to shower and change first. I'll be back in a bit. Make yourself comfortable." I say. I rush past him and run into the bathroom. Peeling the dress off me and letting it drop to the floor in a pool of red. I feel like I can breath alittle. I turn on the water and wait till the bathroom is warm from the hot water before I get in the shower. I take that time to look in the mirror at my slender frame, pale skin, and when my eyes see my face I'm disgusted at the face I see. My mascara has slightly smeared down my cheeks and my lips are still stained red with lipstick. I wash my face, brush my teeth and hair and step into the hot water. Letting it wash off the memories, wash off the smell of Christian. My chest shutters alittle as I hold in my cries. I will wait till no one else is home to hear it.

After I'm done showering and changed into my baggy grey sweatpants a white SWU hoodie. I run my fingers through my hair and take a log look at my bed. I think I'm going to kick Jose out so I can be alone... _Yes. Do that._

Before I reach the end of the hall I hear Jose and Kate talking.. I hide in the shadow to ease drop but their voices are quiet.

"She was crying Kate. What did you do?"

"I just wanted them to get in the same room. They obviously still have feelings for each other. Look at her, she loves that man. And if you could see what Elliot and I do... or lack of seeing him since he never shows to anything anymore once they broke up. They love each other."

"That's not for you to stick your nose in, maybe she was finally over him? Maybe she was ready to move on!"

"Pshh, with who? You?"

I walk out into the living room and my eyes narrow on Kate, she is dressed in what appears to be Elliot's sweats and shirt, but she still looks gorgeous with her obvious sex hair and hangover. "Why?" I shout at her. They both stop and look at me. "Why?" I say again.

"Because Ana, look at you. It's been a year and I can't snap you out of it. Iv tried! But your so distant. You were so lively and when you were with Christian you glowed. He still loves you. Elliot told me, and I see what he means. Did you see the way he looked at you!" She says, she's scrambling to try and make sense of everything she planned and how to explain it without making me explode. "I did it out of love Steele. What happened? I thought he just was taking you home. I tried calling on my way back but your phone just kept ringing because last night I fell asleep at Elliot's but I rushed home as soon as I woke up." Shes almost out of breath.

"Maybe I should go." Jose says.

"He doesn't love me Kate! You don't understand any of it!" I yell at her and fling my arms up. "I told him I loved him last year and he responded that I couldn't because we would never be more than just sex. And don't you think I deserve more than that!" I scream. Jose stops walking towards the door and just looks at me. I have never really talked about my sex life with Christian and now I am just blurting it out.

Her face and Jose's face both pale. I stomp out of the room and into my bedroom. Closing and locking the door. Throwing myself onto my bed. And crying into my pillow till I'm to tired to cry anymore and I pass out.

I wake to someone lightly playing with my hair. I open my eyes and know it's Kate, because it something she comes and does when she is sorry. "I'm sorry." She whispers when my eyes set on hers. "I didn't know it was like that. You never talk to me about it." She's been crying. "I shouldn't of let you go with him, but I knew he wouldn't let anything happen to you. He obviously cares for you."

"Because it's not something Iv wanted to talk about." I say, she sits up against the headboard and I lay my head in her lap and she continues to plays with my hair and suddenly the waterworks start. Thinking about how Christian played with my hair last night as I fell asleep. "I do still love him, but it will never work Kate. We are so different. Looks at him and... look...look at me." I say, my tears soaking into Elliot's sweatpants she is wearing. I wipe my face with my arm.

"Maybe it did start out as sex or whatever and he wasn't looking for something serious because he was a man hoe or whatever. No offense." She stops for a second. I don't move as I sit and think about what she's saying. "He's always been smitten by you. People change and maybe he was just as scared as you were. I don't think he has ever had a real girlfriend before and your a catch. The whole package Steele. Stop selling yourself short. If I upset you or made this worse, I'm sorry. I'm really really sorry." She runs her fingers through my hair and I look at the wall in front of me.

"It wasn't all bad. He just didn't do heart and flowers because he said he just didn't do that stuff. But I wanted that. I think what he misses is the idea of me. Not actually me. The worst part... all the pain Iv been feeling..." It feels so good to get it off my chest, "...is because when I think of having that with someone else I get sick, because all I want is that with him. Because I saw his softer side, but I got to closer to the him than I think he let anyone see. And he didn't like that, he's so reserved."

"Maybe he needs someone like you to bring all that out. To challenge it. All the Greys said, when he was with you he was different. He was happy and open. And so were you." She says. She's right, I was happy... happy having great sex and getting to know playful Christian.

"Want to know what happened last night?" I say, she stills and makes the motion of getting more comfortable for the story. I laugh at her. I twirl around in bed so I'm facing her, we both sit cross legged in the middle. I tell her everything I remember and about waking up in a "spare room" at his place and how he wanted to talk when I was sober. I told her about how he said he hasn't seen anyone, left the part about how they would be chained up and wiped by him if he did. She was beaming, assuring me that maybe we still have a flame. But how do I tell her that the flame is the bite marks when the belt hits my butt. Her eyes widen when I tell her I snuck out.

"Wow, that's sneaky Steele! I had no idea he would take you there. Again, Im so sorry." She frowns but then gets this look o her face like she has pieced together some super mystery and has an new article to write. "If he hasnt been with anyone and you haven't seen anyone and you both have been sulking...what for? It seems you two really miss the other. You wasted a year if you two are really meant to be." She genuinely looks sorry. I forgive her.

"I forgot how beautiful the view was from there. Its so quiet there Kate. Its not even like city living up there in his castle of solitude. He said hes even more wealthy now." I say quiet and roll my eyes.

"Like that's possible!" Kate says and together let out a loud laugh. "So are you going to meet him?" She asks when we finish laughing so hard tears formed in my eyes.

"I honestly dont know." And I dont.

"Well I need to shower and then how about we go grab some lunch or we can order in?" She says.

"Sounds good. Lets order chinese. MMM." I rub my stomach and she lets out a girlish giggle, hops off the bed, and skips out the room. Once alone I scramble for my phone. I find my purse sitting on top of my dresser. Kate must of put them there for me. My hands start to tremble. Has he tried calling me again? I slowly open my purse and turn my phone on.

8 Missed Called  
12 Text Messages

Oh no. Some have to be Kate, she said she tried calling me. So I swipe over to missed calls.

Missed 8:36 Kate  
Missed 8:29 Kate  
Missed 8:24 Kate  
Missed 8:22 Kate  
Missed 8:22 Kate  
Missed 8:11 Chirstian  
Missed 8:10 Christian  
Missed 8:09 Christian

Jeez Kate, I switch over to my text messages and like my calls, most are from Kate. I ignore them all and go strait to the two from Christian.

 _*Maybe I am a fool, but not foolish enough to let you walk out of my life twice.*  
*I dont know how to love but I am willing to learn and all I know is I want to learn it with you. Please meet me tonight for dinner.*_

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 **(A &C Songs)  
** **"Hurts So Good"- Astrid S  
** **"Blow Your Mind"- Dua Lipa**

 **I might have time to edit and upload my next chapter by tonight, latest would be tomorrow afternoon!  
Thank you for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Your reviews are amazing, and I cant help but smile knowing  
** **people enjoy reading this so much!**

 **I personally like when Christian is bossy and protective, but I also fell in love with  
his soft side, I am all about their vanilla love life as love as all the red velvet stuff!  
**

 **There will be all the other characters from the original books!**

* * *

I pace around my room biting my thumb, pondering. I look at my phone again and reread the messages. My first thought is how the conversation might go. Very interesting, for starters, if he hasn't changed then how can we be together? My second thought is that dinner would be a bad idea, very intimate and I dont know if I could eat while trying to have a conversation about maybe having a future together.

*I will agree to tea. Neutral territory, seven. Spots Coffee shop on 44th and Main*

It's a place I go to often, it has two floors so there is a place for us to talk without being surrounded by to many people. The top floor is my favorite. It has large windows to look out over the crowded sidewalks and passing cars. I love to sit up there for hours and people watch. Sometimes I curl up with a good book or I go over manuscripts for work. I don't want to be drawing to much attention to ourselves. I'm hoping the object of being in public will prevent him from trying anything. I press send and throw my phone on the bed. Running my hands through my hair and I tip my head back. He intoxicates me. Just being near him. If he hasn't really moved on is he willing to change for me. But who am I to ask him to do that. I walk out of my room into the living room to find Kate just coming out of her room in her black leggings and large creme cardigan sweater that drapes over her frame. She's bouncing around.

"I already ordered the food, it will be here in 45 minutes. I'll pick the movie and you get some blankets and pillows." She says as she proceeds to go through the movies on the shelf.

"Im having tea with Christian tonight," I say. She stops what's she's doing, twist to face me, and gives me her full attention. "Just tea." I put my hands up to stop her from jumping out of her own skin. I can tell she is containing some of her joy.

"That's great!" She says ecstatically. "It's defiantly a date. Are you going to get back together?"

"No, it's not a date, strictly tea. Just, you know, catch up on how his company is doing, he probably just wants someone to brag about it to." I proclaim.

"Rigghhhhhhhtttt." She says and smirks. "A date." She laughs and holds out a movie. "Phantom of the Opera, the newest one, not that creepy old one with the guy who sews his skin on." She closes her eyes and shutters.

"Perfect." I say. Not like I will be paying any attention to the movie anyways because all I will be thinking about is that I'm going to see Christian later. I grab some blankets and pillows and spread them on the couch.

We watch the movie and eat, pretty much in silence until Kate gasps suddenly and looks at me with wide eyes, "What are you going to wear?" We both break out laughing and continue watching the movie.

It's 5:30 before I know it and I start getting ready. I must leave the house soon if I don't want to be late. I opt for my white skinny jeans, my black flats with little bows on top, and my light black sleeveless blouse. I spend little time on my hair, it's down and wavy. Apply a little mascara and decided to grab a black cardigan out of Kate's closet. I catch her giggling into her phone right before I leave.

"Bye Kate." I say, she looks up from her phone and smile.

"You look wonderful. Good luck." She laughs.

"I'm going to need it." I roll my eyes and head out. Soon after leaving Christian last year I bought a little white Pontiac G6. It's fast and smooth, just my style too. I hop in and I instantly my heart starts pumping faster. Why did I agree to do this? In 25 minutes I arrive at the coffee shop. I park but don't get out right away. I need to take a few deep breaths. I place my hand over my heart and close my eyes. Saying a silent little prayer for strength to walk away if it gets to be to overwhelming and to finally put him behind me. Closure.

Once inside the coffee shop I scan the bottom floor and don't see him. Maybe I'm early, Christian is never late so he is here somewhere. I look at my watch. 7:01. Hmm. I order my tea and decide to go upstairs where it is a little quieter. When I reach the top step I see him sitting in the corner looking out the window at the people below. I watch him for a second before he looks over at me and smiles. Instantly he is to his feet walking my way. I note the that he is wearing a light blue dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up,his top button undone, and black jeans. He smells like Christian, so good. He looks perfect.

"I'm sorry I'm late, traffic." I frown at him.

"I was more worried you changed your mind." His says. No escaping now. We walk over to the table he had been sitting at. I place my tea down and sit across from him. I start twiddling my fingers in my lap, keeping my eyes down. I'm finding it hard to make eye contact with him. "I want to see your face." He finally says. My heart quickens. I look up at him and his eyes are soft, just looking into mine like he's trying to read them.

"How's work?" I say. Trying to just make conversation. About anything but us, I don't want to talk about us... yet.

"Not important." He says. Great, no avoiding talking about us then. He shifts in his chair and looks around the room. I can tell the people are making him uncomfortable. "Why here?"

I look around, "Witnesses." I chuckle a little but cover my mouth when he doesn't find it amusing.

"As much as I want to hear you giggle, I don't find this enjoyable. I wanted to talk privately." His eyes narrow. He leans forward and whispers. "What makes you think I wouldn't throw you over my shoulder in front of all these people and swoop you out of here." He whispers.

I gasp a little, involuntarily. "Christian, what do you want? I really dont know why you would want to meet for dinner, I dont see there being anything to talk about. Hence why I snuck out this morning. I dont really know what to say, I have nothing to offer you Christian. I am the same girl I was a year ago."

"But I am not the same man. I have never felt such pain before, such... loss." He says. "You gave me more in those few weeks we spent together than money could buy. You gave yourself to me, your innocence, your willingness to try new things for me. And it's my fault, I took it to far way to fast and you left." He closes his eyes and shakes his head. I sigh heavily and he opens his gray eyes and looks at me. "I can't replace you, I don't want to."

"You surely must of found a submissive, someone to better meet your needs. I am not asking you to change who you are for me." I say.

"No, it's me asking you to not change, I want to change because I can't live without you. I have tried. I told myself that I would give you time to live without me. A chance at a life without all the kinkey fuckery. I didn't want to crack what rare pure girl you were more than I probably already have. No pun intended." He stills. "When I saw you yesterday, I just had to have you back. All for myself. I'm a greedy man Miss. Steele." He straitens up and looks me over. "I want to make sure you live the best life available to you and I want you to have that with me."

I stopped breathing halfway through him pouring his heart out. "What about all your stuff about punishment?" I finally compose myself to say.

"I won't do anything to you unless you ask me too." He says. He is so sincere.

"What makes you think I will ever ask you to do that to me? Any of those things with canes and whips." I tilt my head and sweep my hair over my shoulder to one side and his eyes fall onto my neck. The conversation is getting more intense and I'm way to hot under his gaze. He licks his lower lip and my insides twist with desire. I want those lips on my neck. _Snap out of it, we are negotiating here._

"Did you enjoy any of it?" He said.

"I uh.. enjoyed all of it. Except for the punishment. I don't want to be punished because I'm being me. I don't like it." I say, I look down at my now cold tea and twirl the cup in my hands. Looking at the small ripples forming. He reaches over and slowly takes my hand into his. The contact gives me goosebumps.

"I tried living without you and I don't want to live without you anymore. I'll do anything." He says. This man, this God like man, is pouring his heart out and willing to change for me.

"I... I..." For a few seconds I'm speechless. He runs his thumb over my knuckles, leaving a trail of tingles.

He reaches over with his other hand and tucks some hair behind my ear. "I regret waiting so long to tell you all this."

"I feel like this is a dream." I say, still frozen.

He chuckles and does his famous fifty half smile. "Funny thing, me too." He turns my hand over and traces the lines on my palm. "Did you see anyone?" His question shocks me. I pull my hand away from his. My face heats up and I look away. How embarrassing and if I did, which I didn't, it really would be none of his business. "I'm guessing from that glorious color on your cheeks that it's a no." I look at him and he looks sad, almost child like. I want to comfort him, tell him everything is okay but it isn't. How will we ever really get passed that? I look down at my watch, it's seven thirty.

"It's getting late and I have work in the morning." I say. He looks at me and his eyes widen.

"Your leaving?" He gasps.

"Just for now. Traffic this late is crazy." I say. I just need to clear my head as much as I want to push this table away between us and kiss his face all over. "What about security? Or telling me I can and cannot hang out with? Or any of that other stuff that is hard limits for me." I am not 5, I don't need a constant babysitter.

"You safety is my number one concern along with you eating. That will never change." He shakes his head. "The other stuff we can work on."

"Why now? After a whole year... I spent all that time trying to pick up all the pieces that broke when I left you, you told me I wasn't allowed to love you. How could this ever work? How do I know you won't leave me even more broken than before? I... I... wont be able to take it. I need love Christian, I am not a heartless submissive who is satisfied with the idea of being your pet because of how wealthy or handsome you are. I will never like you buying me things. There is so much more to you than all that stuff you put on display and I know it." My eyes start watering as my stomach knots thinking about all the nights I cried myself to sleep longing for something I knew I could never have.

"Loosing you was the worst thing that has ever happened to me." He says.

I look into his eyes, picturing him sad and alone in his tower in the sky. "Do you want to be loved?"

"Only if it's by you. My world is gray without you Ana." He leans forward on the table and cups his hands together in front of him. "I know we can never go back and get the time we lost back but I will make up for it. Please Anastasia, I want you back and I will give you more than hearts and flowers." I can tell he has never had to beg for something he wants.

"I dont want your money, it was never about that." I gasp at him.

"I know." he whispers.

"I need to go or I wont sleep at all tonight." I already doubt I will be able to sleep much anyways. I proceed to get up from the table and turn to walk away. Christian is right behind me in a flash, he grabs my elbow and turns me to him.

"Please, I need an answer. I need to know if I have you back or not." He pleads quietly.

"Yes." I say. He is so stunned he lets go of my elbow and I use that an an opportunity to leave. He doesn't follow me, he just stands there shocked as I walk away. My heart beating out of my chest. I speed walk to my car, dodging all the bustling people in the street. When I finally make in inside my little white cloud of quiet, I lean my head on my wheel and cry. Christian wants me back and he says he changed. Will he let me finally touch him now? The whole way home I am thinking about grey eyes and copper hair.

* * *

 **(A &C Songs)**

 **"I'm A Mess"- Ed Sheeran  
"Lay Me Down"- Sam Smith  
** **"Still Falling For You"- Ellie Goulding**

 **I hope everyone enjoyed this, I didn't want to make it to intimate.  
But also give him enough time to explain himself, I for one can see him changing  
certain things for her.  
Sometimes you have to fall before you can fly.**


	5. Chapter 5

**I hope everyone is enjoying this so far!  
I can't wait to keep growing this story with you all.  
**

 **Thank you for all the reviews and feedback!  
** **I take time to read everything people leave me,  
** **it helps me keep going!**

 **Please keep reading and leaving your thoughts,**

 **Enjoy this extra long chapter as a treat for being amazing  
-A**

* * *

When I arrive home I am surprised to see Jose waiting in my driveway for me. He is standing outside his driver door. Leaning against it with one foot on the panel and his arms crossed. I turn off the car and slowly get out.

"If I knew you were stopping by I would of came home sooner Jose. I'm sorry." I say as I walk around my car towards him.

"I tried calling." He says, I stop. I didn't even think to look at my phone when I was with Christian.

"Sorry." I say again. "Is there a reason you stopped by?" I'm not trying to sound rude to him, but right now I really want to go and just digest everything. Alone.

"I never got to say goodbye this morning, Kate kicked me out. I was coming by to check on you and she tells me your on a date. With Christian Grey. What's going on with you Steele? Please tell me you told him to go strait to hell."

"Actually, we are back together." I say to him. His face drops, he stands strait up and walks over to in front of me since I was stopped in front of my car in the driveway.

He puts his hands on my shoulders. "Is it the money your after? I don't understand why you would want to go back! He's hiding something, I know it..."

I put my hand up and cut him off. I back out of his grasp on my shoulders, "Jose, how dare you accuse me of such an awful thing. I don't want him for his money. I don't have to explain anything to you!" I walk around him, he tried to follow me but I turn back around. "No. Go home Jose." I say and then proceed to walk into the apartment, slamming the door behind me. Kate comes running out of her room.

"Ana! Is everything okay? Oh no, what happened?" She runs over and wraps her arms around me. Throwing me off balance.

"It was Jose." I say through her hair in my face. She pulls away and keeps me at arms length.

"What?" She tilts her head. "I'm confused."

"He was waiting in the driveway for me just now," I point back at the door, " I pulled up and he said that you told him I was on a date with Christian. He had the balls to accuse me of only wanting Christian for his money." I say. She gasps. "So I told him to leave and slammed the door in his face, that's all."

"He waited there for over an hour just to tell you that? Thats... odd.. and well you know that's not true. And Christian knows that's not true. I want to hear about your date!" She jumps, grabs my hand, and she plops me on the couch. "Spill Steele."

"It was not a date." I say. Leaving her hanging on my words but not saying anything. "He was a gentleman."

"Annnnddddd..."

"His business is doing good." I laugh. She rolls her eyes.

"Annnnnddd..."

"And he wants to get back together, he says he's ready for a serious relationship." I say. She squeaks and claps her hands together.

"You said yes right? He is still so head over heals for you Ana."

"Yes." I reply back quietly and giggling.

"Oh Ana! I knew when I saw him look at you the night of the Galla that he still had feelings. He couldn't stop looking at you. Every time I would see him that night, he watching you. You two belong together but just... take it slow this time. Make him work for you a little." She reassures me.

"You know, I really have to thank you for this. For kinda bringing us back together. I want everything to work out and I see how sincere he is and I do still love at him. I never stopped." I smile at her.

"I know babe." She says and brushes some hair out if my face. "Your glowing again you know..." She gives me a big hug and jumps off the house and bounces into her room. I sink into the couch and just smile. Oh I can't wait to see him again, but I'm not jumping into bed with him so quick. He for sure has to shown he's changed. From the sound of it he has. I decide to look at my phone. I notice a missed email and 2 missed calls. I roll my eyes at Jose's missed calls and open my email.

* * *

To: Anastasia Steele  
Subject: Dinner  
Date: June 06 2012 8:36PM  
From: Christian Grey

I would like to discuss maybe going on an actual date? Not that I did not enjoy tea with you, I will do that anytime.

But I would like to be in an more intimate setting.  
Perhaps, tomorrow night? I can pick you up at 6 from your place.

* * *

I reread it twice and decide to go get in my pajamas and crawl into bed. An intimate setting? Hmmm, I will hold my ground at no sex. I look back at my phone and respond to Christian.

* * *

To: Christian Grey  
Subject: Dinner Sounds Nice  
Date: June 06 2012 8:45PM  
From: Anastasia Steele

I would be delighted. I look forward to it.  
But I can't stay late, I have work in the morning.

* * *

My stomach flutters. I can't wait to see him again, yet I am so nervous. What if he really hasn't changed? But what if he has? Will he miss it? I turn off the light and fall asleep.

The drive to work was excruciating knowing I have to work a whole day before my date tonight. Everyone seems to be driving extra slow today or maybe it's just my patients. I get to work and I'm greeted at the front door my co-worker Elizabeth. She is making a b-line for me.

"Ana!" She is yelling, "Ana!" By the time she gets to me she is practically out of breath from pushing through people.

"Whoa, is everything alright Liz?" I try to help her catch her breath.

"Yes, yes. I just had to tell you..." She is breathing heavy. "When I got here this morning, and you know I am always the first one here, there was a rose on your desk with a small gray ribbon tied around it. I don't know how it got in here. I think you have an admirer, or worse, a..." She leans forward and whispers, "...stalker?" Her eyes widen and she looks around us at the people entering the worse place. I giggle at her, it has to be Grey's doing, but how did he get in here or know what desk is mine?

"It's okay Liz, I'll take care of it."

"Are you sure?" She says, her eyes still wide.

"Yeah." I say, I link arms with walk her and head upstairs. When I get to my desk, I look at the singular rose. He probably wanted me to think about him all day without bugging me. Even though I already was going to be thinking about him. I wonder if he is thinking about me? I hold the rose in my hand and smile. I walk to the break room and grab a glass of water to put it in, Jack is in there and I immediately try to avoid him. Its to early for his shenanigans. I almost make it back out of the break room but I hear his familiar eerie voice from behind me.

"Miss. Steele, did you finish the manuscripts I asked you to do over the weekend?" He says. I slowly turn around and he is about a foot away from me. I can smell his cheap cologne trying to cover his cigarette stench. Its nauseating.

"Yes Jack, they are in my desk. I will bring them right over to you." I say and make a quick exit before he can try any other conversation. The rest of the day drags by and by 4:45 I am clocking out and hoping Jack doesn't notice that I have gone early.. . I need extra time to get ready for tonight. Elizabeth catches me at the door.

"Hey, where are you off to so fast?" She smiles at me, but looks confused.

"I have a date." I say, not wanting to get into more detail.

"Ohhh! With who?" Shes shocked, and frankly I am even shocked I am going on a date. I laugh nervously.

"Ummm, see you tomorrow!" I yell as I run out the door. She is standing there, eyes wide. Yeah, I would be too if I was her but I dont want people know I am dating Christian Grey.

I wait by the front door at 5:55. My heart about to leap out of my chest. Kate isn't home from her newspaper reporting job for Seattle Times so I am left to wait alone. I pace around the room wondering if I am wearing the right thing. I borrowed a dress from Kate that I know she has been dying for me to wear. Its pale blue thigh length cosmo dress. The thin straps cross in the back while the sweat heart dip in the front, its just lightly hangs under the baby doll waist line to the soft cotton fabric. I check the buckles on my white wedges and look at my self one more time in the mirror and fix my hair to sit in just perfect waves. I look at my phone. 5:58. Why am I so nervous? I grab my white knitted cardigan and clutch and continue pacing the room until the doorbell rings. I take a deep breath, walk over and slowly open the door. He is wearing slim dark blue suit, a crisp white dress shirt, and a gray tie. THAT gray tie. Is he trying to intimidate me. He is doing a damn good job of it.

"Anastasia, you look beautiful." He says. His eyes scanning my body, I certainly feel desired.

"So do you." I say, then I realize what I said. "Well, handsome. You look very handsome." I correct myself. He smiles at me his fifty million dollar white smile and laughs a little. Amused.

"Shall we go?" He says, motioning his hand to the car where Taylor waits for us.

"Yes, please." I say, almost to eager to see what he has planned. I promised myself to leave by 8, at the latest. That gives us 4 hours. 4 hours of avoiding any sexual things. I look down to make sure I have everything and lock the door. AS we walk to the car he has his hand behind his back, almost like he is avoiding touching too. Every time I look up at him he has a smile on his face that makes me knees weak. I really want to wrap my arms around him and hold him close. Feel that he is really here with me right now. He doesn't say anything while walking to the car. He is being very quiet.

"Hello Taylor." I say kindly. Though I feel slightly awkward now, the last time he saw me I was quite the wreck... _both_ of the last times.

"Hello, Miss. Steele." He says and tips his head.

"Ana. Please call me Ana." He open the door for me.

"Ana." He says and looks up towards Christian but I cant see his reaction because he closes the door. He walks over to the other side and getting it. Undoing his jacket and sitting back a little. He looks so hot. I am tempted to take my phone out and take a picture but I feel this is not the appropriate time to ask for one. Though his mood is so good, I second guess it. _Nope. Nope._

"How was work?" He asks me. He is leaning sideways to be able to look at me. His eyes dont leave my body. I dont understand how he can make my skin tingle with just his looks.

"Fine. Well, it was actually slow, very slow." I dont mention the flower to see if he will bring it up. It now has a special place on my desk in a glass of water. Next to my picture of Kate and I from our first apartment. But he doesn't bring it up. I guess I will just mention it at dinner.

"Tell me about your boss." He says. His perfectly manicured fingers reach over and gently touch my bare shoulder. Sending goosebumps down my spine. I look at him and frown, "Can we talk about something else? I think I have enough Jack Hyde today." He raises his eyebrow at me. I decide to quickly change the subject. "Where are we going?" I ask, looking out the window. I notice we are heading towards the bay. "I hope I am dressed appropiatly. I didn't have alot of time to prepare." I say.

"You are perfect." He smiles at me.

"So, there are no rules anymore? Right?" I question him. He frowns but I need to lay some ground rules if this is going to work. If he isn't serious I will have Taylor pull over and drop me off here, knowing there was never hope for us might be might key to moving on.

"Like?" He brushes his bottom lip, I can tell I caught him off guard, he probably thought I was going to wait till dinner to get down to the nitty-gritty.

"Like, I can stay at my place when I want? And drive myself if I want to?" I say, Im fiddling with the fabric of my dress, anticipating his reaction. I want to stay with him, but I need to know I have an out to clear my head if he gets to be to much. Hes a lot of... man. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. When his eyes open back up they are soft gray, but I can tell he is holding back his frustration with these demands.

"You can stay at your place when you want. We can negotiate you driving later." He says. He looks forwards and then down at his watch. His watch probably cost what I make in a whole year, the thought unsettling.

In about 45 minutes we pull up to a large restaurant designed to look like a old wooden lodge. It is consumed by an enormous car port out front that is made of wood, it's connected to the 3 floor restaurant, Fiona's. Looks more like a hotel but the signs say restaurant/bar. It's right on the water, the views from here is amazing already from what I could see when we arrive. Christian always knows all the best places.

"I love it." I say to him when we step out of the car. I'm smiling ear to ear. He buttons his suit jacket and takes my hand as Taylor pulls away. I know he is just going to sit in the parking lot till we are done and the thought saddens me. Does he ever get time off? I turn my attention to Christen when I catch him staring at me. He kisses each one of my knuckles and then turns my hand over slowly to kiss my wrist. The sensation is mind blowing. He is so gentle with me, like he is going to break me. He looks up into my eyes and smiles at me.

"Nothing in the world could top my happiness right now." He says. My heart stops for a second and I just break out in a huge girlish grin. "My God your beautiful." I feel the heat rise to my cheeks and he smiles when he notices I'm blushing and I shy away from his look, he tilts my face back to look at him. "I never want you to hide from me. Iv missed out on to much time with you already that I can never get back." He says quickly and moves away but still has my hand. He leads me into the restaurant. Ignoring glances from passing patrons. He obviously looks out of my league. I accept that.

Inside the restaurant it's light with dim yellow lights giving off a very warm feels. There are lots of people on the bottom floor, I glance around. Tables full of families that want to enjoy a night out. They look happy, some laughing so loud the table next to them in cowering away. I spot couples enjoying a meal together, they look so in love. The place looks crowed. To crowed for Christians taste. The hostess in the front almost falls over when she sees him. Shes a dainty red head with big green eyes. She's very beautiful, if she would take off some of that makeup. She way overdid it.

"Reservation for Grey." He says in a cool tone that even makes me want to faint. I catch myself staring at him and I look away and bite my lip. Suddenly I feel a pull at my chin and my lip frees from my teeth. I look up at Christian and gasp. So does the hostess. He leans in and whispers, "That still has the same effect on me." And he slowly pulls back and looks in my eyes. I'm just staring at him wide eyed. He squeezes my hand a little bit. I am startled when the hostess tells us to follow her.

We follow her over to the elevator, "Floor 3 is all yours Sir. Enjoy." He nods at her, and she presses the up button and the elevator door pops open and Christian pulls me in. She doesn't stop looking at him till the doors are closed.

"The whole floor?" I look at him and he smirks at me.

"I don't like an audience." He says. I'm confused. I watch the floor numbers change while Christian still firmly holds my hand. His other behind his back, almost like he is resisting touching me as much as I am him. The doors open and when we walk in it take me a second to take in everything I'm seeing. Christian lets go of my hand and let's me walk forward on my own. I out my hand on my chest to try to still my heart and I walk towards a table elegantly set for two in the middle of a large, beautiful decorated banquet room. The whole wooden room is empty except for the small setting in the middle for the two of us. The rest of the room is filled with bouquets of red roses. Scattered about the room in various way, I run my hand over some of them as I pass. Stopping at some to smell them. The whole room is filled with the fresh scent of rose. I turn my attention to the wall of glass over looking the setting sun on the sound. The water glistening where the sun hits it just right. I spin around and look at Christian who is still standing by the now closed elevator doors.

"You did all this for me?" I gasp at him. He nods his head in a way of relief that I like it. He starts walking towards me. "It's... It's amazing Christian." This explains the rose.

"I would do anything for you, this..." He gestures towards the room, "Is nothing, just dinner."

"It's everything to me." I say, looking into his eye, and then his lips. I want to kiss those lips. He goes over to the table and pulls out a chair for me. I walk over and sit, taking a sip of the water on the table. He sits across from me and I can tell his eyes are on me and I look out over the water, it's starting to glow orange with the setting sun.

"I have never seen it like this before." I say. "It's really something else." I look back at him after a minute and he is resting his chin in his hand, looking at me smiling. We are interrupted by the waiter.

"Your wine as requested Sir." He says and pour the glasses. Of course Christian planned everything ahead. Above us some soothing piano music starts. It's ties the whole evening together. I take a sip of the wine, it's refreshing and sweet. It goes down so smooth that I finish the whole glass. Christian chuckles.

"Leave the bottle." He says to the waiter and waves him off. He leans forwards and pours me another glass except I don't touch it. I have to pace myself so I take a gulp of water. "I need you to be honest with me Anastasia." He says, his tone has changed to serious and his eyes are not as gentle as they were a few minutes ago.

"Okay." I say. Wiping my mouth with the napkin cloth.

"Do you still love me?" He asks.

"I tried not to..." I say honestly after a few seconds. "I didn't plan on falling in love with you. But I did because there is so much about you to love, you just didn't see it." His closes his eyes for a second. "And it hurts me that you thought yourself unlovable."

"I felt undeserving of you. That you needed something more genuine than what I was looking for. Thats why I didn't reach out after you left. I was not going to force someone into that type of lifestyle." He finally says when he opens his eyes back up, they look almost closed over like he is holding back tears.

"What do you feel now?" I ask.

"That I cant live without you. That I can offer you that something more, I dont want to be alone anymore Anastasia. I was scared before. I am not anymore." He sits up strait and leans into the table, reaching across and taking my hand. "I loved you from the second you fell into my office and I still love you to this very second. I never stopped."

"Will you let me sleep in your bed with you?" I ask.

"I can't sleep the same since you left, I need you there with me. I want you next to me every chance I get since you insist on going home some nights." He huffs. I laugh at him and the waiter brings out our dinner. We eat, watching the sun set over the sound. It's beautiful. Watching the sky change from orange to red and then to black. The city lighting up in front of my eyes and the sounds of passing ferries. Its soothing. After a filling dinner of steak, potatoes, steamed veggies, and two more glasses of wine, I am full and getting tired. Christian was done way before me so he has be patiently waiting till I finish every bite on my plate. After a second to digest he stands up and walks over to me and puts his hand out.

"Dance with me." He says. I look at his hand and then at him. He has removed his jacket but he is still wearing that tie. I bite my lip when my eyes land on it. His mouth parts alittle. I push my chair back and take his hand. He lightly pulls me up and walks me over to the window. He pulls out a small remote from his pocket and the room is instantly filled with Coldplay, Fix You.

He puts the remote back in his pocket and takes my hand, wrapping his other around my back, his hand sprawled out slightly over my side. He pulls me tight to him and he starts moving. He moves with such grace that I dont feel like I don't actually know how to dance. He twirls me around the room and all the flowers. My hair brushing along my skin. The fabric of the dress lightly swaying against my sensitive skin. I forget about the last year. All those nights without him, thinking he had moved on or found a new sub. He was actually doing the same thing. Waiting.

After a few minutes he stops and dips me effortlessly. I tilt my head back, my hair brushes the floor. I close my eyes enjoying the weightless feeling. He very slowly pulls me up, letting go of my hand and moving it to my neck when I reach standing position. He sings in my ear with the music, "I promise to look for my mistakes." Oh wow, he can sing. Really good too. He pulls away and looks down at my lips and leans in. He is holding the side of my face in his one hand his other tightly sprawled out over my back. Holding my body flush to his. His thumb rubs my cheeks as his lips meet mine.

His kiss is slow and soft, molding to mine, pressing me closer to him. He parts his lips and his tongue grazes my bottom lip slowly before deepening his kiss. Im holding onto his elbows for support. I feel the floor come apart beneath us and everything disappear as if we are the only two people left in the world. Oh I have missed this. He grazes my top teeth with his tongue. Leaving behind a minty taste. I move my hands to his hair and pull him to me. I have never wanted anything as bad as I do for this moment to never end.

He pulls away to soon. "Its getting late. I should get you home."

* * *

 **(A &C Songs)**

 **"I Won't Let You Go"-Snow Patrol  
"Fix You"- Coldplay**

 **I once again apologize for an mistakes in my spelling or grammar.  
I might overlook a thing or two when prof reading. :(**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi everyone, Sorry for the delayed update,**  
 **I have been really sick and so have the kids,**  
 **so here is a small chapter I have been working on.**  
 **I really want to show Christian's softer side without**  
 **into the main plot of the story.**

 **I have been getting some questions about a Pintrest.**  
 **I did start one 'StarshipLight' for chapter one.**  
 **If people would like me to continue I will do every chapter after its uploaded.  
I will also go back and do all the chapters I have already written,**  
 **So let me know in reviews! I would love to if people will look at it.**

 **Enjoy, and always, thank you for taking time out of your**  
 **day to read this :)**

* * *

It's Friday and Jack has me busy at work. I had to bring work home every night this week and I was up till midnight some nights working on it. Now, today, I have skip lunch and I have to bring work home with me for the weekend. Christian is upset because I haven't seen him since Monday. I can't stop laughing, thinking about our date. He does know romance, and well. As much as I want to see him, I told him I don't need distractions and that I need Jack off my ass. I'm putting together the last of my stuff to leave the office today when my cell phone rings. I look around for Jack's disapproving look of cellphones in the workplace. He must have left for the day. I look at who's calling; Christian. My heart quickens and I clear my throat and answer.

"Hi," I answer in a quiet voice.

"Hello, Miss. Steele. It's Friday. No excuses; I must see you," he says. I look over the folder in my other hand and decide it can wait. Jack will be mad for it not being finished by Monday but I deserve the weekend off. I will just work late next week. I open the top drawer of my desk and slide the folder in.

"I need to get my car home," I say. My little G6 will get towed if it is parked on the street all weekend. "You can pick me up from my apartment; I need to pack some clothes anyways. Do you want me to spend the whole weekend? I need to be back by Sunday night, though." I hear him let out a long breath on the other end. Relief? He is probably as impatient as I am to see him but I can't ask Taylor or Sawyer drive my car home for me. I love driving and this was one of my conditions.

"Of course. I will be there at 5:30. Laters, baby." He hangs up. I pull the phone away from my ear and look down at his name on the screen. Baby? Ohh, my heart hums with joy. A voice behind me startles me.

"Ana, Jack wanted me to give you these three manuscripts to go over. He wants them done by Monday," Elizabeth says and pushes the green folders into my open hand.

"Monday?!" I say so loud that two of our co-workers stop and look at me.

"Yeah, something about being important potential clients and..." She looks around her to make sure no one is near and leans in closer. "...and that you have no life." She backs away quick. "His words, not mine, Ana."

"Well not like it's any of his business but I am going out with..." I look down at the folders in my hand, "It's not important. Anyways... yes, these will be done." I put them in my briefcase and grab back out the other one from my desk. Guess I'll work on them when I am with Christian.

"You have a boyfriend?" She's gasps and hugs me. "I knew you looked happier!" She giggles. Is it that obvious? Yes, he makes you happy. "Who is he? Do I know him?"

"Umm, probably not. He is kind of a loner," I say, which is true. She might know of him but she does not actually know Christian.

"Well maybe I can meet him someday. Got to go, Ana, if you need anything just call!" She hops off to clock out. Great, just how I want to spend my weekend. Working on stuff for Jack. I pack up the notes I'll need and head out the door.

I arrive home with only 15 minutes to pack. I rush around my room, grabbing my black leggings and sweatshirt, for when I get cold, and I throw in a few summer dresses and whatever else I think I'll need. I'm sure I over packed but I don't know what he has planned. I'm putting my toothbrush in my bag when the doorbell rings. I zip up my pink and white pinstriped bag from the 10th grade and head to the door. Oh, this is heavy. I grab my briefcase and struggle to open the door.

As soon as Christian sees I'm struggling he takes the bag from me. "Whoa, what did you pack?" he asks, raising an eyebrow at me.

"I have no idea what to expect, so I basically packed a little of everything. Oh, and my briefcase because I have work to do. Boss's orders." I lift up my briefcase a little to show him and then I frown at him. "I tried to get out of it."

"I'm sure we can find time for you to work on whatever you need to do. But not tonight; tonight you are all mine," he says. He reaches over and wraps his free hand around my back almost knocking me over. His lips meet mine fast and eager. The warm softness of his lips against mine ignite every atom in my body. He pulls away all too fast, leaving me breathless and with a hint of mint on my lips.

"I will not argue to that," I giggle.

"Oh, how I have missed your laugh." He closes his eyes and opens up to a softer gaze. "Let's go." He unwraps his arm and walks towards the door. I lock up and we walk hand in hand to the car.

"Hi, Taylor." I smile at him.

"Evening, Miss. Steele," he says. I smile and shake my head at him. We need to work on this name thing. I climb into the car while Christian gets in on the other side. "You look beautiful," he whispers in my ear and puts his hand on my leg. I am still wearing my white blouse and grey pencil skirt with white flats. My hair is up in a bun with some hairs falling slightly out of place from rushing to get packed.

"You look... hot," I say and blush. He is in his light grey dress pants with black dress shirt. He looks really hot, like straight out of an Express catalogue. It should be illegal to look that good. "How was work?"

He sighs, "Productive, I would say. All technical. I'd rather talk about what you want to do this weekend." He leans against the door and rest his chin in his hand. His 5 o'clock shadow has started to take form and he looks relaxed.

"You are the one who is good at planning things. I'm sure you have some ideas." I have to admit, the only thing I want to do is stay in and make out.

"My parents would like to have everyone over for dinner tomorrow night. I thought we could go to that. But I want you to pick something." He smiles at me. His thumb drawing circles on the fabric of my skirt. Causing the skin underneath the become sensitive.

"Maybe we could stay in and watch a movie." I say and look out the window at the passing cars and buildings, thinking about today.

"What's wrong?" he asks and pulls me closer to him, startling me. I look up into his eyes and he is serious. "You seem distracted." Do I tell him I can not stop thinking about my fight with Jose and how I have been avoiding his calls? Do I tell him about what Liz said about Jack and me having no life? Why does Jack have it out for me? I decide to opt out of both.

"I'm just tired. I'm sorry." I frown at him.

"Well you can take a nap when we get inside. I actually have to work in my office for an hour or so to finish up so my weekend can be free." He reaches up and caresses my cheek with his thumb. I lean into his touch and close my eyes.

"A nap in your bed sounds nice," I say, already tired just thinking about a nap. His bed is so soft and comfortable. His pillows are like sleeping on something made specifically for me. He chuckles and releases my face and I lean onto his shoulder. Closing my eyes, listening to his breathing. I'm almost asleep when Christian lightly shakes me away.

"Ana, we're here. Just a little longer and then you can sleep," he whispers in my ear. I sleepily open my eyes and sit up. I blink till I can focus and then look over at Christian who is already standing out of the car with an outstretched hand for me take. He helps me to my feet but my body is still drowsy and I sway a little. He notices and holds me to his side. "Do you want me to carry you?" he asks quietly in my ear.

"No, no. I'm okay." I smile up at him. We start walking towards the elevator. My heart starts pounding, thinking about Christians apartment and how calm I feel when I am here. I slowly watch the floors change numbers as I catch a glimpse of Taylor holding my pink bag and briefcase. I want to tell him I will carry it but for once I really appreciate the help. Christian's hand is firmly on my side and I lean my head into him. He reaches up with his other hand and lightly brushes my cheek with his fingertips. Mm, I could fall asleep right here. The door dings open to Christian's castle in the sky. I step out with Christian as he takes my bag from Taylor and leads me to his room. The memories here in this room can be overwhelming. I walk over to the bed and run my fingers over his comforter and pillows. I turn and look at Christian who is leaning against the doorway, just watching me.

"I forgot how big you bed was," I laugh at him. He stands up straight and walks over to me, his eyes not leaving mine. "I... I..." Before I can finish he closes the space in between us in a few strides. His hands twist in my hair, pulling me to his lips. He kisses me while pushing me back till the back of my knees are against the bed. He slides his one hand down my back so he can slowly lower me onto the bed without breaking our kiss. Ohh, I want him. Right here and now. He's laying on me, his weight hovering over me supported by his elbows, his body warming against mine. He pulls away and gives me a few small kisses before moving a stray hair from my face.

"You are the most beautiful creature," he says as he starts trailing kisses over my jawbone and then down my neck. My breathing quickens and a need in me awakens. He pulls away and slides off the bed, pulling me into a standing position with him. "I have to finish a few things and then I'm all yours, baby," he says and gives me one last kiss and leaves the room, leaving me breathless and wanting. I suddenly remember how tired I am. I grab my bag off the chair where Christian set it and change into my sweatpants and hoodie. I take my hair down and it falls in waves brown my slender frame. I draw the blinds closed and crawl into bed, falling fast asleep on a cloud.

My eyes snap open to the sound of my phone vibrating in my bag. I slip out of bed and grab my phone. Jose. I roll my eyes and click accept.

"Ana! You finally answered. Look, I am sorry about what I said. I didn't mean it, it's just you have been so down for so long and..." He is rambling and my eyes are not even all the way open yet.

"Jose... Jose... I don't have time to talk right now," I say, rubbing my temple with my other hand.

"Let me make it up to you. Drinks on me tonight?"

"I am actually spending the weekend at Christian's place. Maybe next week." I hear him sigh on the other end.

"Okay, I will hold you to it Ana." He sounds disappointed but I honestly don't care.

"I have to go," I say and hang up. I don't know if I can forgive him yet. Some friend, he was such an ass. I glance at the clock; I've been sleeping for almost 2 hours so Christian should be done working. I put my phone back and decide to go find him. When I enter the living room, I hear his voice coming from his office.

"No damn it... no... fix it... I am off for the weekend... yes." I stand in his office doorway, watching his CEO demeanor but when he looks and sees me, his body language changes instantly. His mouth forming a perfect smile. "I have to go... no, don't bother me all weekend. I'll see you Monday Ros." He hangs up his phone.

"I'm sorry if I interrupted you." I frown at him. He starts walking to me with this... look.

"You can interrupt me anytime," he says. "Are you hungry? I think Gail left some lasagna in the fridge we can heat up."

"Is she here? I haven't seen her in..." I stop and decide not to finish that sentence. "I always liked her."

"She was very fond of you too. She never actually said it but I know she was disappointed when you left. You can see Gail tomorrow; I sent her home for the night. Actually, I sent everyone home. It's just the two of us here." He reaches up and rubs his hands down my arms. "I'm going to go change. I'll meet you in the kitchen." He grabs the bottom of my chin and kisses me, leaving butterflies in my stomach as he leaves me standing in his office. I never knew what it looked like in here, I walk over to his desk, looking at the perfect stack of papers in the corner. My eyes scan everything till they fall on the glider that I left for him. He still has it, all put together in the corner of his larger desk. I walk over to it. I slowly pick it up.

"Remind of you of a better time, still?" His voice says from behind me. I spin around and he is dressed in a white tee and grey sweatpants. I shouldn't be snooping.

"You kept it?" I ask, looking down at the glider in my hands.

"Of course I did. It reminded me of the best few weeks of my life," he says, taking the glider from me and setting it back on the desk. He turns tilts his head at me. Damn, he looks hot. "So what do you want to do?" He asks, wrapping his arms around me, bringing my body flush to his. I have to tilt my head up to look at him.

"Do you have any movies here?" I smile at him.

"Do I get to hold you close if you get scared?" he asks.

"Maybe you will be the one scared and I will have to hold you," I laugh at him.

"I don't get scared, Miss. Steele," he laughs at me and let's me go. He takes my hand and leads me into the living room. "In the cupboard over there should be a few movies. Elliot tends to leave one here once in awhile so I put them there. I doubt there are any good ones. If not, we can rent one on demand. I am going to heat up some food."

He walks into the kitchen and I venture to the black shelving unit on the wall. I pick up the stack of about six movies. Lara Croft Tomb Raider... such men. Boring, boring, boring. I'm about the set the movies down when a silver disk falls to the floor. I pick it up and in white letters on disk it only says JAWS. I set all the movies back but the one. I walk over to the kitchen, catching Christian putting some lasagna on hot plates.

"What's Jaws?" I ask. He looks at me and raises and eyebrow.

"You have never seen Jaws? It's a classic," he says.

"Nope," I pop my lips on the 'p'.

"Let's eat first and then we can watch it," he laughs and shakes his head at me with a big smile on his face. He is enjoying this.

The lasagna tastes like heaven. I will have to tell Gail when I see her that she makes a to-die-for dish. I have missed her cooking. During dinner, we talk about Kate and Elliot. Christian thinks Elliot is ready to pop the question. I am nothing but happy for Kate; I nearly fall out of my chair with excitement. Afterwards, I clean up the plates while Christian sets up the movie. I plop down on the couch next to Christian with the big black blanket from the other night, snuggling under his arm. Within 5 minutes, I'm hiding my head under the blanket and Christian is laughing.

"I. Do. Not. Like. Sharks," I state, sternly.

"Are you scared?" he asks. I peak my eyes above the blanket at him; he's leaning on the arm on the couch with his chin in his hand, quietly laughing.

"A little." He reaches over and hooks his arm under my legs and pulls me onto his lap.

"I'll protect you from any sharks," he says. He reaches up with his one hand and brushes some hair out of my face.

"You can't fight off a shark if it's attacking me," I laugh at him.

"Have you seen me in the gym?" He looks at me and smirks. His ego might have grown a little bit right there. "Clyde would disagree with you." He smiles. We watch the movie with me curled on his lap and his arms around me. Half the time I covered my eyes with my hands and curled up closer to Christian.

He makes me feel complete; whole again. And for the first time in a long time, I am content with life. I ignore the nagging part of my brain telling me I should be working on those manuscripts right now. Jack was right though; for the last year I have done nothing but work so I really didn't have a life. I didn't go out like everyone else. Now I have to tell him I need less work so I can actually spend some time with Christian because when I am with him I don't have any worries. By the end of movie, I have sworn off oceans for the rest of my life and Christian is laughing at me.

"They are not that bad, it's a movie. Everything is more dramatic in movies" he laughs and before I can answer his mouth caresses mine. We are intertwined in each others arms to the credit music of Jaws. His one hand is sprawled out on my back and I sit across his lap. With a swift movement, he has me on my back and is hovering over me. The blanket falls to the floor as he moves his body on top of mine. His tongue pushes through my lips and my hands fist in his hair. He pulls back and looks down at me. I slide my hand down to his cheek and he closes his eyes. I trace under his eye with my thumb and down to his jaw. His lips part. "I want to make love to you," he whispers and turns his head to kiss my palm. I freeze. Am I ready for that?

 **Edited By: dontcare89**

 **Micheal buble- everything**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi everyone, here is a much anticipated update  
I hope you enjoy, as always, thank you for taking time to read this!**  
 **I appreciate all the support!**

 **Don't forget I started a Pintrest, StarshipLight**  
 **Follow for outfits and maybe some clues to questions asked :)**

 **-A**

* * *

"I want you to make love to me." I answer, he smiles and leans in to kiss my neck. I close my eyes and focus on the feeling of his lips on my skin. Listening to my breathing. He pulls me up into a standing position with him and leads me to his room. He keeps looking at me with a smile on his face, I bite the end of the sleeve of my hoodie in anticipation. We get in the room and he stands me in the center of the room. He dims the lights and removes his socks. Who knew someone could make remove their socks look sexy. He walks over to me and slowly pulls the hoodie sleeve from my teeth. He licks his lips and his eyes scan my face.

"Since the moment I met you it's only been you. I could never look at another girl the same. I guess I was waiting for you to come back into my life somehow." He pushes a lock of hair behind my ear, giving me goosebumps. "I am not letting you go again." He says softly, grabbing my chin softly to look at him directly in the eyes. "You. Are. Mine." He says between soft kisses to my lips. "Forever." He puts both his other hand on my back and pulls my flush to his body, I can feel his erection digging into my stomach through my hoodie. Needs in my body start to flicker. A need for him.

He reaches his hand around and slips it under the back of my hoodie. His fingers gliding across my skin. I close my eyes and tip my head back. His fingers on my chin slowly trace the skin from my chin down to the neck of the hoodie. I roll my head to the side and he runs his fingers back up my neck to my ear. Then he trails them along my jaw and he starts kissing my exposed neck. We slowly start walking backwards till I feel the bed behind me. He backs up, leaving me needing his skin on mine. He reaches for the hem of my hoodie and slowly pulls it up. His knuckles grazing my skin as he lifts it up over my body. When I open my eyes back up and shake my hair out his mouth parts a little. I want to touch him, I need it. To feel like I have him, not just a part of him but all of him.

"I need to touch you." I tilt my head to the side, softening my face. His eyes study mine, flickers back and forth between the two. He reaches for the hem of his shirt and pulls it off his head. I take a second to look at the broadness of his shoulders, he is more fit than the last time. His arms are slightly bigger and as I look down to his abs, they are more cut. My inner goddess wipes the drool off her face. He pushes me on the bed, startling me and causing me to let out a small yelp. I start giggling as he crawls over me and hovers over my face. "You HAVE been working out." I say. He grabs my hands and pins them over my head. I gasp. This is unfair.

"I want to touch you first." He says, "To make sure you are still real." He lets go of my hands. I grab onto the blanket for something to hold onto while he starts kissing down my neck and over the dip in my collar bone. I haven't removed my bra yet, he kisses around it. But I want his mouth on my breast. I want his mouth everywhere on me, my body screaming for it. I wiggle under him, he reaches his hand up and sprawls it over my tummy to hold my down. Each kiss sends me deeper and deeper into the cloud. _Cloud Nine._ I start letting out small groans and his fingers flew on my stomach, his need is growing to. Right into my leg. I tip my head back and let out a gasp and his tongue slides across the waistband of my sweatpants. My inner goddess hulk rips off all her clothes and screams TAKE ME. He slides off he bed and with it slides my pants. The crisp air gives me shivers.

Just as soon as I am cold I am warm with Christian's chest touching mine as he puts his lips to mine. His chest hair tickle on top of my breasts. He rolls me over so I am laying on him, then he sits us up into the sitting position. Reaching behind me he slowly undoes my bra, the anticipation is building. With ease he slides the strap off my arms and my body groans for his touch. I close my eyes and his hands glide over my breasts and his kisses on my neck. His hands travel around to my back. He pins me to him and flips me onto my back again. Hovering over my almost naked body.

"I feel like I have waited a thousand year to see you again." He says, looking into my eyes, brushing some hair off my face from flipping me. Its practically everywhere. "You enchant me." His eyes water up a little, this is a far more intimate moment than we have ever shared. I reach up and touch his face, his scruff itching the inside of my hand. I lift my head up and kiss him, bringing his head back down to the pillow with me. There is so much I want to say but right now all I want to do is be wrapped up in his touch and I know he needs that too.

His hand is under my neck, pulling me to him. His mouth mimics what I do, he shifts off me a little and runs his knuckles down my stomach to my cotton panties. He slides his hand in between the fabric and my skin and i find myself already about to let go. His fingers slip lower and lower. He catch his breath against my mouth at how ready I am for him. He kisses me back with need. He then insert his finger. I gasp and he moves his lips to my neck as I moan at the feeling. he rubs my with his thumb and my body quickens.

"Oh, no, not yet. I have waited to long to let you come that fast." He says in my ear, and continues kissing my neck. He removes his fingers and moves away from me off the bed. Im breathing loud and a chill flows throughout my body, leaving behind the tingle of the tip of an orgasm that he left unfinished. He slips my underwear off and I am completely vulnerable. He slips off his pants and boxers to spring free. He reaches over to the top drawer of his dresser and pulls out a condom. I watch as he rips the foil and slowly guides it on. He slides onto the bed over me. I slide my hands down the sheets and raise one slowly towards his chest. He is hovering over me giving me enough room to slowly place my hand over his left peck. He closes his eyes and lets out his lips part. I sprawl my fingers out into his light hairs. I can't tell if he is in pain though.

"I would never hurt you." I whisper. His eyes open and he looks down at me. His face looks younger, relaxed. He lefts his one hand up and steady his body on his other elbow. He puts his hand over mine.

"I have known for to long what it feels like to not have your touch. I am not going to push you away anymore." My heart melts. He wants me to touch him. He lets go of my hand and reaches up, cupping the side of my face. He is yearning to be loved and we have denied our feelings for each other for to long. He slowly slides his hand down my neck, the feeling so good I close my eyes and lay my head to the other side. He continues down my over my breast and down my ribs. His fingers dipping in between each rib dent. He moves his hand over to my hip and around to my but, lightly squeezing it before grabbing the back of my leg. He holds me still as he eases into me. The feeling is overwhelming, my body almost heating up from the inside. I arch my back as he continues to fill me. I feel all the air leave my lungs as he pulls back slowly. _Oh My._ It feels so good.

"Ahh," I moan out.

"Oh, Anastasia." He says into my ear. Rhythmically he moves in and out. My nerves tingle and the rest of my body relaxes. I open my eyes and look up at him at his soft gaze. He quickens a little, my body pulsing under him. I feel it coming, my release. I hold onto it, the warm tingle in my inner core that will spread through out when I come. His breathing deepens and his fingers dig deepening into my thigh. Hes close too as he pulls me closer. My hips rock up to meet his, he lets out a loud groan and together we both hit our climax. Our bodies hot and covered in a thin layer of sex sweat. It smells sweet and salty. He smiles down at me and I cant help but smile up at him.

"Do you have any idea what you do you me?" He says, slowly pulling out. I wince at the sudden emptiness I feel when he is gone.

"I wish you knew what you did to me." I say back, I watch as he slides off the bed, removes the condom, and puts just his sweatpants back on. They hang on his hips in that way that makes my mouth go dry. _Round Two?_ No, I am completely exhausted now. "Can I ask you something?" I blink at him as he crawls towards me on the bed. I am still naked but I am holding the blanket around me. He gives me a kiss, biting my lip as he pulls away.

"Anything." He says.

"What did you do for... you know... your needs?" I say, looking away from him, embarrassed. I know he instantly knows what I mean, he chuckles and lays down on the bed next to me, I stay sitting up.

"I perfected self pleasure." He says and smirks his rare sexy smirk. I instantly feel silly for asking. "What about you?" My eyes shoot to his and I tilt my head.

"Nothing. I went my whole life avoiding sex that it was easy to just... not want it. At least not anyone but you." I say and throwing the blanket over my head to hide my blushing. He sits up and pulls the blanket from over my head.

"I should have never let you walk out that door. It was the biggest mistake of my life. I will never make that mistake again Ana. I promise you, your life will be everything you want it to be." He pushes hair off my cheek, his ends tracing my jawline.

"I just want all of you. No secrets, no boundaries, no rules." We stare into each others eyes for a minute. I could stay like this forever. I reach my hand through the gap in the blanket to touch his chest. He closes his eyes. "You are more than what you lead on to others. I want to know that side of you. I never want to let you go either." He opens his eyes back up and they are fire. He grabs my face and kisses me. pushing me onto my back. The blanket falling off from around me. He kisses me everywhere from head to toe. I giggle against the feather kisses.

"No. Secrets." He says in between kisses to my stomach. "No. Boundaries." He travels down to my inner thigh. "Some. Rules." He says. I freeze and suddenly his tongue is THERE. Oh. I groan into my hands as his tongue traces circles. I wasn't ready for another round, but now I am. I feel my body getting ready to release again but he stops and slips off the bed. Grabbing another condom, pulling off his sweatpants, and rolling it on. He slides over me and his mouth is on mine. Passionately he kisses me, or tongues gliding against each other. I grab into his hair, pulling his closer as he slowly goes in. He groans against my lips. He leans to the right and rolls me over on top of him. Oh, hes deep, I could climax right now. "You are in charge." He says and puts his hands on his thighs. I see that even with the littlest movement his eyes roll back a little. He is not one to have someone take charge of him like this. _Except Miss. Robinson_ I push that thought far from my mind for now.

I slowly rock my hips back and forth, I can feel him so deep and it feels so good. I place my hands on his chest and his eyes meet mine. I pick up my pace and he throws his head back and lets out a loud moan. There is something about having this power over him that makes it even more hot. I close my eye and roll my head back.

"Oh. Fuck." He says and tightens his grip on my thighs. I release and let my body feel the growing sensation of my climax.

"Christian." I call out his name and clasp on his chest. He places his hands on my back, lightly massaging my sensitive skin, I feel myself drifting. With such ease he puts me back onto my back and pulls out of me. I dont even open my eyes, I just roll over and let sleep start to take over. Christian climbs into bed behind me. I feel his weight on the mattress as he gets on. The soft blanket slides up my skin as he covers me. He plants soft kisses in my hair as I drift off to sleep.

* * *

 **(A &C Songs)**

 **"Never Be Like You"- Flume  
** this song belongs more in chapter 2 or 3, but I love this song for them. **  
"Need You"- Ember Island  
"Latch (Acoustic)"- Sam Smith**

 **I have to admit, I was really nervous to write this chapter...**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello,**  
 **I am going to answer a few questions or statements without giving anything away.  
Some will be answered through this chapter.**

 **Q: Is the rose from Christian?**  
 **A:I can not revel, there will be more about it soon.**  
 **Q/S: She wouldn't be able to hide from Christian for a year.**  
 **A: I never said he didn't keep tabs on her, more to come...  
Q/S: About my dialog being a bit wooden.  
A: I totally understand, I hope as I progress I am able to get better, I am still nervous about all of this.**

 **I understand what I write here is not perfect but I enjoy it, its a great feeling knowing  
so many of you out there are reading this. I cant believe I hit over 500 followers! I literally cried.  
You are so supportive and encouraging. I love it and appreciate all of it.  
I promise to write as much as possible between my boys, husband, and my full time night job.**

 **Again, thank you for reading!**  
 **Reviews are always appreciated!**

* * *

"Mmm," I groan as I open my eyes. I smell bacon and it's mouthwatering. I sit up in the empty bed, clock says 9:30. I throw my clothes on from last night and head towards the smell. "Mm," it smells so good from the top of the stairs. I slowly walk down, looking around the large space for Christian. I reach the kitchen and I stop when I see Gail. I watch her for a few seconds. She moves around the kitchen, she doesn't notice me so I knock on the door frame to get her attention without scaring her. When she looks up and sees me she smiles from ear to ear. She puts everything down and wipes her hands on the towel.

"Oh, Miss. Steele! I am so happy to see you!" We meet in the middle of the kitchen in a big hug.

"Please, call me Ana." I giggle. We pull away but hold each other at arms length. "It is so good to see you again." I smile at her.

"Will you be staying?" She says.

"I hope so." Christians voice says from the doorway. We both drop our arms, he flashes a smile at me. He's still in his sweatpants and t-shirt from last night, he looks so laid back and carefree. I wonder what he has been doing. I shyly smile at him and look back to Gail.

"Come sit, I will make you some tea Ana." She smiles at me and gets back to work. I walk over to the barstool and Christian follows, sitting next to me, he places his hand over mind and grazes my knuckles with his thumb.

"Did you sleep well?" He asks with a satisfied grin knowing instantly what he is referring to. I look at him with an 'is this appropriate to be talking about' look. Christian pays no attention to Gail.

"Better than I have in ages. How about you?" I blush and look at his hand on mine.

"Never better." He says and runs his fingers through my hair.

"After breakfast I have to do some work." I frown up at at him.

"Okay." He leans over and gives me a kiss. I instantly melt into a puddle on the floor. Oh, he makes something so little mean so much. We eat breakfast together, talking about what to expect at dinner tonight.

"My mother will be ecstatic." He laughs and shakes his head.

"I look forward to seeing her. She is so kind and loving. You are lucky to have such an amazing mother and father." I say to him. Thinking about their love makes me blush. I want that, the way they look at each other.

"That I am. But I am also to have such an amazing girlfriend." He smiles. I love when he smiles, he looks so much younger. I finish the last of my french toast.

"Thank you Gail. I missed your cooking." I laugh at her and I get down.

"Well dear, you could use a few pounds on you. Whatever you want, whenever. You just let me know." She says. She's right, I need to start eating more.

"Thank you." I say as I follow Christian out of this kitchen. "Umm, I am just going to sit on the couch if that's okay. If you have work to do, that's fine." I shrug at him. "I should only take an hour our two."

"Okay, I will come check on you in a little bit." He says and scoops me into a wet kiss that tastes of fresh orange juice. He sets me down and kisses the top of my hand before disappearing into his office. I stand there, frozen, my heart beating out of my chest. I get my briefcase, my phone, and the big black blanket from his room and make myself comfortable on the couch. In my briefcase I have four manuscripts that each require minor tweaking. I don't know why this couldn't wait till Monday. I much rather be in bed with Christian again. I pull out my old thick blacktop that is surely hanging onto its last circuit. Sometimes I loose work and it infuriates me but it's a laptop. I pull up notes that I have on the first manuscript. I am focusing away when I look up and Christian startles me. He is standing at the end of the couch looking at me and looking at my laptop. I slam it shut and put it under the blanket.

"What?" I smirk at him. His hands are behind his back and his face strait. I know what he's thinking. "No Christian, it's fine." I say and put my hand up.

"Was it your father's, it looks ancient." He says.

"Your ancient." I say to him. He rolls his eyes and start walking always. I turn and look over the back of the couch at him, "Did you just roll your eyes at me Mr. Grey?" He freezes and turns around. I set my hand on the back of the couch and my chin on top. He looks towards the kitchen to see if Gail is near. Then he starts walking towards me. When he reaches the back of the couch he leans down and whispers.

"Are you going to punish me?" He pulls away and smiles. Just then my phone rings, ruining the sexual tension I feel boiling inside. I search through the blanket for it, Elizabeth? I open it and answer.

"Hi Liz." I say. "What's up?" It's strange because she never calls me... unless Jack needs something.

"Can you come down to the office?" She sounds out of breath.

"Whats wrong?" I say worriedly.

"Jack is flipping out on me and he wants you to come down here right now. A whole book printed wrong. We have a shipment of 300 books coming in Monday and ugh. It's just a mess and he's pissed." She is talking so fast I don't really understand what she means. I look up at Christians confused face.

"Can't it wait Liz, I am sorta busy at the moment." I'm still looking up at Christian.

"Jack insists you come down to the office RIGHT NOW." She says. I drop my head into my hand.

"I will be right there." And I hang up the phone. "I have to go to the office." I say into my hand, I hope Christian isn't mad. I slowly peak up at him, his eyes are narrow.

"I will take you there but first, let's take a shower." He put his hand out for mine.

"But.." How can I argue with a shower. I need one. "Okay. A quick one." I smirk and take his hand he to eagerly leads me into his bathroom. He lets go of my hand just to turn the water on and he's back. Almost instantly the mirrors start to fog. His hands are in his hair and his lips are in mine. His lips move along my skin.

"Rule 1: You must get on birth control." He says. He straitens up with a serious face.

"It's my body." I say and cross my arms.

"Are you saying you want to get pregnant?" He raises an eyebrow at me.

"No." I say and look down. He has a point, I do not want a baby and if we are going to be sexually active then I should be on something.

"Then what's the argument." He says.

"Why do there have to be rules? I don't understand." He closes his eyes and pulls me to him.

"Just things that apply to your health and safety. I need to know you are safe at all times. Not that you wouldn't make lovely babies, now is not the time. We have a lifetime together to worry about that." He says into my hair. It's almost like he is apologizing. Clearly he doesn't understand that I am in no position to be a mom right now. I just started picking up my own pieces.

"We will talk about this later. Speaking of time, we need to shower quick so I can make it to work and fix whatever they messed up." I mumble into his chest. He pulls away.

"I can do quick." He smirks. He pulls me into the sculling hot shower. Clothes and all and instantly it feels heavy. He backs me up in to he wall while the water falls on us. His lips on mine and our hands in each others hair. My need for him growing and he knows it. He pulls away and starts peeling off my clothes. His eyes never leaving mine as he slowly peels the heavy wet hoodie off me and drops my sweatpants. He throws them in the corner and stairs at me, I am naked underneath. He licks his lips as he hastily peels off his own clothes. My mouth is watering as I watering for him and for his mouth on mine. I reach out and pull him to me once hes stripped. I press my lips to his, needing him. He responds by wrapping his arms to me, holding me close to him. His erection digging into my stomach. He groans into my lips.

I dig my fingers into his skin as we deepen our kiss. Its more than just that though. Its like we need this as much as we want it. My body ignites and my breathing quickens. He pulls away and turns me around. Running his hands down my arms and kissing my shoulder. I close my eyes and just allow the water to fall around me. I roll my head to the side as he moves his kisses to my neck. I let out a moan of pleasure. He reaches around and grabs my breast and sprawling his other hand across my stomach and down till his fingers graze the lips of my vagina. He insert his finger and starts making circular motions. I press my hands against the wall and steady myself.

"Don't move." He whispers into my ear. Like I was going to anyways. He pulls out his fingers and I suddenly feel empty. He looks into the pocket of his sweat pants on the shower floor. I hear him rip open the packet and then silence for a second. I focus on the sound of the water hitting the tiled floor. He comes up behind me and places his hand on my stomach again but reaches between my legs from behind. Pushing my legs open allowing him better access. My body responds by pushing my butt out in to him. "You are so beautiful." He says, but he sounds like he is talking to himself. He eases into me. I let out a whimper almost as he goes deeper and deeper. It is so tight. He slowly starts moving in and out. He cries out for me as he quicken his pace. He holds me steady with his hand on my stomach. I feel my body about to release when I hear him let out a long breath. I let go and we both climax and then collapse on the floor together.

After composing ourselves we make haste and shower. I'm standing in just my towel I go through my bag of clothes on the chair and look for my jeans.

"Crap." I mutter. I forgot my good jeans at home.

"Whats wrong?" Christian emerges from his closet in dark jeans, black socks, and a black t-shirt. His face is scruffy and hair in a sexy mess on his head. He looks eye popping.

"I forgot my favorite jeans back at my apartment." I say. He smirks at me then a worried look washes over his face. "What?"

"I know you will find this strange but the closet upstairs is still full of all your clothes." I dont know if I should be shocked or thankful. I still hate the idea of wearing clothes he bought for me but right now I am in need of some jeans.

"I should yell at you right now, but I dont have time." I pout at him. Right before I am about to leave his room I stop in front of him. I look into his eyes and sincerely say, "Thank you." I stand on the top of my toes and kiss him, wrapping the hand not holding my towel around his neck. He sighs and kisses me back. Melting in my arms. I pull away a few inches. "How did I get so lucky to have you all to myself?" I tilt my head a little to the side and smile at him.

"I am asking myself the same question about you." He says. I give him one last quick kiss and run to get dressed. The closet upstairs is a dream girls closet. It actually puts Kate's to shame. I run my fingers along the fabric of the dresses and down to the shirts. Even the shoes are top designer and not to mention gorgeous. I grab some clothes, quickly dress and head back downstairs to Christian. He is waiting by the elevator for me with Taylor. "Ready?" He asks.

"Yup, lets get this over with." I sigh at him. He takes my hand and we head to SIP. When we pull up in front of my work I am nervous to ask Christian to stay in the car. "Can you just... stay here? I would be quicker with no distractions." He scoots over next to me and looks out the window up at the building.

"What floor?" He asks.

"14." I says. "I will only be 20 minutes." He looks at me with his eyebrows creased.

"Hurry up." He says. I scoot out of the car and rush into the office building. When the elevator door opens I hear them before I see them. Jack is yelling at poor Elizabeth. I walk over to the office and stand in the doorway. Jack is sitting on the front of his desk while Elizabeth is over by the corner. Almost cowering from him.

"Jack, what is the problem?" I say. He snaps his head at me.

"Oh, look who finally decided to show up." He says and rolls his eyes.

"I am entitled to a life outside of work you know." I say back, crossing my arms. I walk in to the office and stand next to Liz. "Now whats wrong so I can fix it, my ride is waiting for me." He gets up and walks around the desk to fumble with some papers. He pulls out a sheet and scans it over with his eyes.

"On Monday you sent out the revised copy to "Green Moon". Am I right?" He says with a snarky attitude.

"Yes." I say, I look over to Liz and put my arm on her back and start rubbing it up and down. She looks exhausted. Jack is so hard on her too.

"Well you fucked up! You sent them the unrevised copy and they are shipping them here on Monday. Thats three hundred $30 messed up books!" He yells. I admit I have been distracted with thought of Christian but there is no way I made that big of a mistake. I checked the email twice.

"I will send them the new email right away. I am really sorry Jack. It won't happen again." I say. I turn to walk out the door to go to my desk.

"You think that I am going to let a mistake like that off the hook?" I stop and turn to look at him. He stands ups trait and tall, like he is proud of himself or something. He finally caught me in a mistake after slaving for his ass for a year. He starts walking around the desk towards Liz and I. I catch her gaping at me.

"I know I sent out the right email. " I try to explain.

"Really?" He spits.

"I'm serious, let me show you in my emails." I turn and walk out the door towards my desk, quickly turning it on and looking for my recent sent emails. Jack hovering over my shoulder. Liz follow close behind and watches Jack with wide eyes. She cowers under him. I look through my sent emails and find the one to the Golden Printing Press. I reread my email and it clearly has the correct files attached. I find a second email, one that says the first one was the rough draft and this one is the new one. I open the file attached and its the rough copy.

"I did not send that email Jack. Someone must of hacked into my computer because I don't know how it got there." I try to explain. I am looking at the email over and over. It was sent the same day but after I clocked out. I was on my date with Christian.

"Jack I am sure this is a mistake. I know Ana, she wouldn't mess up like that." Liz squeaks from behind me. I turn and smile at her and mouth 'Thank you'. She nods.

"Shut up." Jack hisses at her. In a flash Jack bends down and with his arm pushes everything off my desk except my computer. My picture frame goes crashing onto the floor, the glass shattering everywhere along with the glass with the some-what wilted rose. "You are going to pay for your mistake one way or another, higher up will not let me fire you because it is MY ass on the line. Corporate is very unhappy and is looking for any reason to fire me right now. I will not let some little bitch mess this up for me. Now clean this mess up and get out of my sight." He yells and storms off into his office. Slamming the door so hard the frame on the wall shakes violently. Tears prick in my eyes and I bend down to grab the frame.

"What an ass, Ana. Don't worry about it. I am sure we will figure this all out." Liz says from next to me, she picks up some office supplies and papers. I start picking up the shards of glass, thinking who knows my password. Most of all, who would do that? I's so distracted that I cut my finger. Small amount of blood starts trickling.

"Oh, shoot." I whisper. Liz looks at my finger.

"Oh, you cut yourself." We both stand up when something catches her eyes. She looks past me at the door. I turn around and Christian is standing in the doorway.

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 **Who liked Jamie as Christian in the movie?  
** **I personally like scruffy Jamie, not movie Jamie**


	9. Chapter 9

**I was up all night to finish this chapter,**  
 **I hope everyone enjoys my quick updat. Its not a long chapter**  
 **but I wanted to continue with what happened**

 **Thank you for reading xoxo -A**

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His eyes are narrow, he looks pissed, I wonder how much he actually heard between the three of us. He walks over to me with a glaring gaze that does not leave my eyes,.

"Do you know him?" Elizabeth says in my ear but I ignore her.

"Christian." I breath out. "What are you doing up here?" My heart is pounding. I'm holding my finger and blood trickling out. Liz is silent at me and clearly drooling over Christian. He pulls out a monogrammed delicate handkerchief out of his pocket and hold it on top of my finger. He is acting cold towards me though, it feels off.

"Grab your things." He says through his teeth.

"Excuse me?" I say looking up at him.

"You are not coming back here. Do I make myself clear?" He says.

"Is this your boyfriend?" Elizabeth whispers. I look towards her and then look back up in Christian.

"I told you to not come up here." Christian holds the handkerchief to my finger and looks at Jacks office door intently. "How much of that did you listen to exactly." I look past Christian to see Taylor walking into the large room. Suddenly I hear Jack's door swing open and him start to yell...

"DID YOU..." I spin my head around and his face is pale. "Mr. Grey, I was not expecting you." He looks down at Christian hands lightly holding my finger.. I haven't had a chance to see how bad the cut is or if I need stitches. "I'm sorry if my employee is causing a problem." I whip my eyes to Christians.

"Is this how you treat your employees Mr. Hyde?" He growls. I can feel his grip on my hand tighten.

"I don't understand what you are talking about. This mess? Oh it's nothing, a little... accident. Miss. Steele here is quite clumsy." He says. Christian looks down at me.

"That she is." He says. His face expressionless. His eyes flicker over to Liz and he almost makes a face of disgust before looking up to Hyde. "Tell me again about what exactly Miss. Steele has done wrong?" He says. I look back at Hyde who's face pales after he realizes Christian heard what he said.

"I am not sure what you think heard, but it certainly is not what you think and certainly none of your business." He try's to explain. He starts walking over to us. My anxiety kicks in and I start trembling, maybe out of fear of what Christian will do. Does Hyde know how powerful Christian is.

He leans down and whispers in my ear, "Go wait in the car." I look at him, he is angry, his brow is creased and his eyes dark.

"Anastasia, how about you go wait in my office while I have a talk here with Mr. Grey." Jack says from behind me. "Let me have a look at that finger."

Christian's one hand moves to my hip and he pushes me to the side, never letting go of my finger. "Don't you dare touch her." He growls at Jack.

"I do not see why you have such an interest in this matter, it does not involve you." He says. I look up at Christian and he is staring Jack down. My eyes falls to Elizabeth who is standing in between two desk closer to us. She looks petrified. I look at Jack who is looking at me when my eyes meet his. I instantly look away. Christian takes a deep breath, looks down at me, and grabs my other hand with his free hand. He takes my fingers and places them where his just were.

"Keep pressure on this till I look at it." He says. "Taylor. Take Anastasia and her friend downstairs." His eyes never leave mine. Taylor takes a step towards me.

"I am not going anywhere." I say, standing my ground.

"Now is not the time to argue with me." He narrows his eyes at me. He looks over at Taylor who approaches my side.

"Come Miss. Steele." He says.

Before I can register what happens Jack grabs my arm trying to pull me away. "She doesn't want to go with you." Christian takes one look at Hyde and punches him right in the nose. I hear the crunch of the breaking cartilage.

"Christian!" I yell and cover my mouth as a loud gasp escapes. Liz squeaks and jumps back. Jack stumbles back and falls right on his ass. Blood pouring out from hiss now flattened nose.

"You fucker." Hyde stands back up and takes a swing for Christian. Taylor grabs my shoulders and moves me out of the way. Christian is much faster and his moves are cleaner. He steps to the side and lands a blow to the side of Jacks neck and then a upper cut to the gut as he was hunching over. Liz starts crying.

"I should kill you for talking to her like that. If I ever see you again I will." He says. I can almost feel his anger.

"Stop! Stop!" I yell. Christian looks at me. His eyes on fire. Jack sputters on the ground and gasping for air. I almost feel bad for him.

"Christian, let's go." I say, Taylor let's go of my shoulders. Christian steps around Jack and puts his arm around me. "You shouldn't have done that. Now I am out of a job." I say. He raises his eyebrow, he just defended his girlfriend and I am worried about a job. I wiggly away over to grab my picture and the rose off the ground. Jack is still on the ground, Elizabeth walks over to him and comforts him. Traitor much. I shake the glass off the picture of my and Kate. I walk over to Christian and he puts his arm around me and we leave. I look back one last time at Hyde and Liz, the image imprinting in my brain. We get to the car, I am holding my finger tight.

"To my mothers, Taylor" he says.

"Yes, Sir." Taylor nods and pulls away into traffic. Christian eyes my stuff.

"Why is the flower so important?" He says as he slips the out from under my arm.

"Because you gave it to me." I say back, his face drops.

"Where did you get this?" He says. My heart quickens and I break out in a cold sweat.

"It was on my desk." I say. "I thought after seeing dinner that it was from you..."

"I would never send you just one rose Anastasia. When exactly did you find it?" He takes my hand and hold the handkerchief for me.

"Umm.. When I got to work Monday morning... Liz stopped me in the hall to tell me that it was on my desk when she got there. And she was the first one there so she didn't know how it got into a locked building." I say. I look down at the rose. "It had a grey ribbon on it." I think back to how I took it off and used it to tie my hair back on Thursday. He pulls out his phone.

"Welch, I need you to get me all the security tapes to the cameras outside SIP all week and Monday morning... Yes... By tonight..." And he hangs up.

"Someone hacked into my emails when we were on our date." I whisper. "Thats why I got called there in the first place. Someone purposely sent out an email to get me in trouble. But who would do that? Who could hack into my emails?" He looks at me. He pulls out his phone and calls Welch again, demanding the logs to my work computer for Monday night.

"What does the rose mean?" I'm shaking. Is someone trying to set me up now that I am back with Christian, no one even knew except for Kate. I shake the thought of accusing her out of my head instantly. "Who do you think its from?"

"I don't know." He pulls the handkerchief off my finger and blood gushes out. "But I will find out." It's my pinky finger of my left hand, so much blood for a small finger. "You need stitches." I pale. I have never had stitches and I do not like needles.

"Are you sure?" I wince.

"Awe baby, don't be scared." He pulls me close to him and wraps his arms around me and puts his nose I'm my hair. "I should have killed him." He says after a minute. I just remembered... I pull away and look at him.

"What if he presses charges? What if you are arrested?" I gasp at him. I had not thought about that. "My job... All the work I have done. Gone." I frown. Tears prickle in my eyes. I planned on moving up in SIP, maybe one day take Jack's job. Christian raises his hand up to my cheek, using his thumb to wipe a stray tear. His warm palm cupping my face.

"I am not getting arrested," he chuckles, "Let's not worry about that stuff right now, okay?" I feel like throwing myself face first into a pillow and crying my eyes out. Hours and hours of lost sleep this past year to just loose it all in one day is heartbreaking. I sniffle up my tears and decide I will just let it all out next time I am alone.

Sniff, "Okay." He kisses my forehead and I lean into his armpit with his arm wrapped around me.

"We are almost to my mother's." Christian says, he is lightly shaking me awake, I had fallen asleep on the way. I sit up grabbing my finger out of his. "I am really sorry about your job. I know it meant a lot to you. But I think something better will come out of this. Trust me. Okay?" He kisses lips softly and tucks my hair behind my ear.

"I do trust you. I guess I could use a mini vacation anyways." I say, that small nap has me feeling a little rejuvenated.

"Will you stay with me?" He says.

"Well I don't know how long I will be out of work for. I don't want to burden you or anything." I say. He chuckles and smirks at me.

"Burden me? If I remember correctly you are the one who wanted to only come on weekends." His arm is stretched behind the seats, he moves his hand to touch my neck. The littlest of his touch sends shivers down my spine.

"Here sir." Taylor says. Perfect timing. I slide out of the car super fast. Before Taylor can even get out and open the door for me. Grace opens the front door.

"Ana is that you? My darling I was not expecting this!" She comes with open arms toward me but stops when she she's my hand.

"Dr. Grey, it is so nice to see you again. I know we are early but I umm... Had an accident at work this afternoon." Christian comes up behind me and wraps his arm around my back.

"Oh come in dear, let me look at it. Christian go grab my bag out of my office, please." She comes and takes me from Christian, wrapping her arm around me. I turn and look back, he frowns at me and I just flash him a smile. Grace and I walk into the house. I forgot how big and elegant their house was. Grace has such lovely taste in furnishing and decorations. I follow her into the kitchen and sit on a bar stool at the end of the island. She pulls out a clean wash cloth and gets it wet with warm water.

"Thank you Grace." I says. She looks at me confused.

"For what dear?"

"For welcoming me back into your home after you know..." I look down at my hand and Christian's poor ruined handkerchief. She walks over to me and places her hand on my shoulder.

"Christian was only ever truly happy with you. I am more than delighted that you worked it out. Everyone in the family is. Your such a delight Ana, please don't think we will ever think less of you. Things happen." She smiles at me. She instantly made me feel a thousand times better. I wish my mother was more like her. She removes the handkerchief and examines my finger, some blood gushes out. "You will defiantly need a few stitches. Good thing I know a good doctor." She winks.

We both break out in laughter when Christian comes in. "Were you guys talking about me?" He laughs and sets Grace's bag on the counter.

"Not everything is about you son." She says. I blush and look away, laughing but trying to hide it from Christian. After a half hour I have acquired 6 new stitches on tip of my finger. "Not to bad, huh?" Grace says.

"Not as bad as I thought but I surely don't want anymore." I chuckle. She puts a white bandage over my finger and cleans up the mess. Christians grabs my hand and pulls me out the back door in to yard. "I should help clean up." I say before exiting the room.

"No, no, it's okay. You kids go." Grace says.

"Thank you Grace. For everything." I smile at her.

"You are family Ana. Anything for you dear." She smiles and turns back to cleaning up the blood soaked gauze. I feel bad but Christian has me out the back door in a split second.

"Not so bad right?" He smiles down at me. We stop halfway down the yard and I look at the light glistening off the sound.

"I guess not." I say looking down examining my new bandaged finger. I frown when I remember everything that has happened. "Everything is changing." Christian moves around to stand in front of me, blocking out the sun. he puts his finger under my chin and makes me look up at him.

"My feelings for you have never changed and never will Anastasia." He says. "But I have changed so I can have you in my life again because I never want to know feel that emptiness when you are gone. I am sorry about your job but you will get something better. You were being held back of your potential anyways there."

I sense that he feels bad I can't go back. I wrap my arms around him and slam into his chest, letting tears flow down my cheeks. "I love you Christian. That will never change." I say. His arms around me tighten. He kisses the top of my head and I feel his whole body relax. I have to stop denying that I feel the best when I am with him and his arms around me like this.

From behind me hollers a squeaky familiar voice. "ANA!" Mia yells.

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 **Thanks again for reading!  
All my followers are amazing, thank you for all you kind reviews!  
**


	10. Chapter 10

**I am so sorry that I vanished for the last month...  
Things came up and on top of the discouraging messages I got,  
I needed a break and to think about if I wanted to continue.  
And I have decided to, I wont update everyday. Maybe once or twice a week.  
** **But I have almost 700 people who I see want to see this story and it warms my heart.  
**

 **Your reviews really do push me to keep going,**

 **So enjoy this answered filled chapter and let me know what you think!**

* * *

I wiggle out of Christians arms just in time for her to run into me. She wraps her arms right around my neck almost knocking me over. "I am so happy you two are back together. Oh, this makes me so happy." She squeaks.

"Me too." I giggle into her hair. She lets me go and holds me at arms length.

"I can't wait to catch up." She laughs. "Tell me, how are you."

"Im good." I look over to Christian and smile. Looking back at Mia, "Really good."

She smiles from ear to ear. "So your not mad at me or Kate about the gala?"

"Not at all." I laugh. If anything I should be thanking her.

"I'm going to go inside and find dad." Christian says from next to me. He leans down and kisses my cheek and then my hand with the injured finger before taking off. I watch him walk all the way back into the house. I look back at Mia.

"You're glowing you know." She laughs.

"Am I? Iv been having quite the day." I giggle.

"Tell me all about it, we can go sit by the water in my favorite swing. We have plenty of time before dinner. I want to tell you all about my trip to Italy last May." She grabs my hand and we walk down to a swing by the water. It's peaceful here. One can only dream to grow up in such a place. We talk about her trips and all the boys she met. I tell her I didn't really do anything the past year but work. I leave out what happened today. I don't want to talk about that.

"I love him you know." I say while staring at a passing sail boat. "I never stopped. I just didn't think I was what he was looking for." I look over to her.

"He never forgave himself for letting you go. You were the best thing to ever happen to him. He was so hurt." She says. "No one can ever doubt you two love each other. The way he looks at you, he has never looked at any girl that way." She laughs. "I hope one day to find someone who looks at me that way."

"What way?" Christian erupts from behind up. He walks around to the front of the swing. Mia sticks her tongue out and her thumbs in her ears, she crosses her eyes and makes a funny face. I laugh so hard I almost snort.

"That way butthead." She laughs and wraps her arms around me from the side. Christian just raises an eyebrow at us. I look down at my new jeans, there is blood on them and I just notice. I run my thumb over it and frown, Christian instantly picks up on my mood change.

"Come on Ana, lets go for a walk." He says and pulls me from Mias arms.

"Not fair, I wasn't done playing with her." She pouts. I giggle at her, she is the only one who can act like that with Christian and get away with it, their bond is unlike any other he has.

"She was mine first." He says and wraps his arm around me, we start walking down the small grass hill towards the large wooden dock on the water. He holds my hand while we walk. I look at the water flowing under the dock between the wooden boards.

"I thought I'd never see this place again." I say quietly looking over the water, Christians hand tightens around mine a little. He stops and spins to look at me. He takes my head in both his hands. He breaths out. Looking deep into my eyes. "Sorry I shouldn't of said that. I guess I'm just overwhelmed. Everything is changing so fast." He rubs his thumb on my cheek and looks over my face.

"For the good I hope." He says softly. I reach up and place my hand on his chest.

"Nothing bad can come out of being with you Christian. I love you and the fact you don't shy away from my touch anymore..." I sprawl my fingers out and look down at my hand. "... There is nothing I want more than to be here, with you right now." I look back up at his eyes.

"It took loosing you to realize how much I loved you. I never felt such loss. Such emptiness. You were everything I told myself I didn't want, but everything I knew I wanted. I had never loved someone before and I never wanted to love anyone else but you." He lets go of my face and runs his hands down my arms and takes my hands. "I never will love anyone but you." He looks down at my bandaged finger. I notice the throbbing again and wince. "How about we go get cleaned up. Elliot and Kate will be here soon." He says.

"But I don't have any clothes here, I have blood on my pants." I frown. He looks at me and smiles.

"I'm sure Mia will help you out." He says, he leans down and pulls me into a deep kiss. His hands sprawling out over my back, his body flush with mine. For a few seconds the world stops around us. Only the sounds of the water beneath us clapping against the dock and a few passing birds. His lips leave mine to soon and I'm left breathless my hands wrapped around into the nape of his hair. My body craves his. Here and now. I try and push my needs down deep but they are fighting back. "Tonight." He says to me. There he goes with the creepy, knowing what I'm thinking thing. I look back over the water, wrap my hands around his back and lean my head on his chest. He holds me like that for awhile. I feel at peace until I hear my name loudly being shouted in the distance. I turn my head and squint my eyes. It's Kate. She's waving at me and shouting from the middle of the lawn. I look up at Christian.

"Let's go." I laugh and grab his hand. Walking back to the house. I occasionally look up to find him always looking down at me and smiling. Giving me butterflies. I meet Kate in the middle of the lawn.

"I have been trying to get ahold of you." She looks down at my hand. "What happened?" She's says.

"Oh nothing." I wave off. "Let's go inside, I need to clean up."

"Sure." She says and then looks at Christian. "Elliot is inside looking for you."

Christian looks down at me, "I will tell Mia to find you." He plants a soft kiss on my lips and disappears into the house.

"You two seem so happy." Kate beams.

"Yeah, everything is great." I smile at her.

"I need to tell you something important. It's really hard for me, because your my best friend in all." She takes a deeps breath. She's hesitating.

"Tell me Kate." Maybe she is pregnant.

"Okay, well... Elliot asked me to move in with him and I said yes." I can see she is trying to hide her happiness to spare my feelings about her moving out. I'm actually genuinely happy for her. She sacrificed a lot the last year to keep me happy as she could, and if anything I would have never met Christian if she didn't get the flu, and we wouldn't be back together if she didn't take me to the gala with her.

"I'm happy for you Kate, really. Congratulations." I give her s big hug and squeeze her a little. I let go and she is smiling so big, he glorious Kate white smile.

"What are you going to do?" She's ask, and I honestly don't know.

"I really don't know right this second. So much is changing Kate and right now I have not even wrapped my head around it." I cross my arms and close my eyes. Trying to push everything to the back for now. I open my eyes. "I think for now, I'll just stay with Christian. He likes the company." I say.

"Of course he does." She winks. We both laugh and Mia pops out from the back slider.

"Come with me Ana, Christian gave me permission to dress you up!" She runs over to me and grabs my hand. "I'm stealing her for a little while Kate." She beams a big smile at Kate. She waves her hand to go on and just laughs at Mia. We go strait to her room. Not passing anyone on the way, I wonder where Christian is.

For the next hour Mia has me try on outfits and she does my hair. We talk about high school, she had a much different experience than me. By the time we are done I'm dressed in a short pale pink satin summer dress with black flats and a thick black belt wrapped around my waist. My hair hangs in big waves down my frame and thick black mascara. I feel beautiful.

"Mia, you really outdid yourself." I say looking into the mirror at my reflection.

"That dress looks much better on you. Keep it. The color suits you." She finishes her hair and we head downstairs.

We bump into Kate and Elliot first. They are drinking beers on the back patio. We join when Carrick and Grace join us. We are all standing around, everyone drinking wine and beer. Carrick welcomes me back to the family and we all clink our glasses and bottles together. I feel at home here. The hair on my neck stands up as he slowly wraps his hands around my waist from behind me and nuzzles his nose in my hair. I smile and turn fifty shades of red in my cheeks as everyone watches us. I try to hide my face in my hair.

"Sorry, work called." He whispers in my ear. After a second everyone looks away, making me feel less awkward. Christian spins me around and I can't help but melt into his gray eyes. "Hi." He says. His hands sprawl out on my sides. His thumb circles the fabric.

"Hi." I whisper.

"You look beautiful. I defiantly approve of this dress." He smiles down at me. I blush and look away. Christian let's go of my sides and grabs my hand, lightly looking at my finger.

"It's fine Christian." I says to him. Trying to take my hand back but his thumb pins my wrist down. I frown at him.

"You will need to change this bandage later." He says. He kisses my palm.

"We are just waiting for one more person to show up and we can eat." Grace says from behind us. Christian's eyes shoot over to his mom.

"Who?" Mia asks for everyone.

"Oh, Elena Lincoln is in town and I invited her." I watch Christians face change. "She's a charming lady Ana, you will like her."

"Can't wait." I smile at Grace but look back at Christians blank face. He grabs my hand and squeezes it tight, I can tell something is wrong. "Christian?"

"Hmm." He looks down at me.

"Do you have any Tylenol? My finger hurts a little." I just want to get away from everyone so I can ask him what's bothering him. Does he not like this woman?

He shakes his head as to clear his thoughts, "Of course." He leads me away from everyone and back into the house. We walk up the stairs the second floor and into a bathroom off the corridor. I could get lost in this house.

"What's wrong Christian?" I ask once inside the closed bathroom. "Who is she?" He ignores me, fiddling through the large medicine cabinet on the wall. "Stop." I say loudly.

"She's no one." He says coldly.

"Doesn't seem like a no one." I cross my arms and watch him tap two small pills in his hand and fill up a glass of water. He holds his hand out for me to take them. I refuse and give him a scowl. Then my brain seems to put two and two together. "Is she Mrs. Robinson?" His eyes flicker to mine then away.

"I will tell my mom we are leaving." He try's to walk around me but I block the door.

"We are not leaving." I cross my arms.

"This is not up for discussion Ana. Move." He puts his hand on my side to move me.

"You do not get to decide for me Christian." He rolls his eyes at me and pouts his face. He doesn't want to fight with me, nor I with him. I look up at him, "I will not be rude and leave the party. I haven't seen your family in a while and quite honestly I miss them. Also, I am quite curious on what this woman looks like." He raises an eyebrow at me and shakes his head. He looks at the wall above my head and thinks for a second.

"I don't like this but fine, we will stay." He says looking at the wall above my head, I can tell he is bothered by me wanting to stay, why do I even want to stay, I really don't want to meet this woman but I need to find out what she looks like so I can put a name to a face. He finally looks down at me. "You are one frustrating woman Anastasia Steele." He plants a kiss on my cheek and takes my hand. I love so he can open the door and we hand downstairs together. When we get to the bottom I hear some laughing I'm the hallway, unfamiliar laughing. It must be her. My heart starts to pound. We turn the corner and there stands an emasculate tall blonde. She is beautiful and suddenly I feel the color from my cheeks fade and my knees weaken but I hold steady. I can't let Christian sense that I am completely and utterly uncomfortable right now with this situation. He squeezes my hand.

Elena is talking to Grace by the back door. They both look at us and instantly Elena breaks out in a large glorious smile. It makes my stomach turn. Christian use to have sex with this woman and she manipulated a teen, she is a pedophile in my mind but I will not show my disgust in front of Grace.

"Oh, Christian dear, I haven't seen you in a few weeks. How have you been?" She's says as she walks over and wraps her silk blouse arms around his neck. My heart drops. A few weeks? He gives her a one arm hug because he doesn't let go of my hand. "Is this Anastasia? What a surprise..." She draws out the last word while looking confused at Christian. He looks at me for my reaction to all this and I can't tell what he can read on my face. He looks at her.

"Yes Elena, I would like to state Anastasia and I are back together." He says and pulls me in closer to his side. I feel so awkward and I regret not leaving before this.

"And what a wonderful surprise it is that they are back together." Grace happily chime in behind Grace. "They are just lovely together. I already consider Ana like a daughter." She says. I feel myself blush and Christian leans down and kisses my cheek. Okay, now I feel a little better.

"Thanks Grace. How sweet of you." I say back.

"Let's join the others." She claps and turns the stunned Elena around and locks her arm in hers. I'm thankful Grace has turned her around so I can't see her face. They walk outside, Christian hold me in place. I finally let out a long breath I didn't even know I was holding. Christian spins me around to look at him, he talks both sides of my head lightly in his hands.

"I know what you are thinking. She is ugly on the inside, believe me. And under all that makeup is a whole lot of nothing. You are naturally beautiful Anastasia. You don't need makeup, your most beautiful when your naked." His thumb traces my cheek.

"I wasn't thinking that." I lie. Blushing. "She said a few weeks... did you go back to her when we broke up." I look down. He makes a disgusted almost laughing sound that makes me look at him.

"Absolutely not, it was a business meeting. Don't think such foolish things. I said I haven't been with anyone since you because I haven't. I don't lie to you, I don't have secrets." He says. "I love you, now that you met her let's join the party and get this night over with. Ignore anything that comes out of her mouth." He says. He kisses me softly but passionately on the lips and then we head to the back.

After dinner we all stayed outside and waited for the sun to fully set, everyone is chatting and laughing, in groups of two or three. Kate and Mia are sitting on a bench by the edge of the patio between two large mum planets in big vases but I can't help but feel I am being watched. Every time I looked up at Elena who standing near Grace who was talking with Elliot, she was grilling me. Watching my every move. It was unsettling and made my stomach turn. I didn't tell Christian, I don't want him to think I can't handle things like this.

The sun is almost set, I can see some stars popping through the slowly darkening sky. It's beautiful from her. I feel myself tiring. Christian is a few feet behind me, talking with his dad about a baseball game. I wonder when Christian finds time to watch baseball, I can see him just looking up stats to make sure he is on track when he sees his dad. I giggle to myself at the thought and Christian looks at me and smiles.

"I'll be right back." I say and slowly proceed to walk away, Christian leans down and whispers in my ear that we are leaving soon. I smile up at him, thank goodness because all I want to do right now is be draped in his arms in bed. My feet hurt and I'm starting to get chilly. He goes back to talking to his dad and I hurry inside and upstairs to the one place I know there is a bathroom. After washing my hands and running my fingers once through my hair I exit the bathroom to find Elena standing right in front of the door. She puts her hand on my chest and pushes me back into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. Her eyes never leaving mine. She then puts her finger up to her lips and masked the sush sound. I want to scream for Christian but by staying I asked for this to happen.

"What do you want Elena?" I say with as much attitude as I can to hide that I'm secretly terrified of this mannequin model looking woman.

"I want you to understand one thing here Miss. Steele, I can take you down. Turn your whole world around. If you don't leave Christian, things are going to get bad for you." Her eyes almost have an evil red tint to them.

"Try what you must, but I'm not leaving him. Never again. In fact... I agreed to move in with him." I wide smile at her and tilt my head to the side. I'm trying to make a dig. Her face blanks and then she curls up into a evil spiteful smile.

"You think moving in with him is going to make him want you, in time he will remember why it wasn't going to work out in the first place. Just remember this.. the longer you two are together... the more hell I am going to cause for you." She winks. "Have fun finding another job, I am watching you." She giggles and leaves the bathroom before I can even get a word in.

She is the reason I lost my job? She hacked my computer and sent the false email? The rose... a warning that she is watching. Instantly my eyes start to water and I lean against the counter. I tilt my head back to keep the tears in and not ruin my makeup. I don't want Christian to see this. After a minute I compose myself enough to leave the bathroom, I want to leave right now. I'm walking down the stairs with my head down, thinking about everything that has happened since I have been with Christian again, and I can't wrap my head around this woman. I look up before the bottom step and he's standing there with his hand out for me.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"Noo..nothing." I stutter. "Can we go? It's been a long day."

"Of course baby, let's go say bye to everyone and then we will leave." A sigh of relief washes over thinking about just the two of us alone.

"Thank you." I whisper. He leans in and kisses my forehead and pulls me into his embrace. We take a few minutes to say bye to everyone, I mostly wanted to spend more time with Grace but I will try to come back another day. I need her to understand that I love her son, I need to tell her myself and explain the last year to her. Even if she is happy to have me back, I won't feel welcomed until I do.

When we reach Kate I give her a lingering hug, "Lets get lunch this week and we can discuss what to do about the apartment. I glance up at Christians confused face.

"Kate is moving in with Elliot. I was going to talk to you about that later." I frown, feeling like Kate put me in a bad spot.

"Oh you didn't tell him?" She makes an O with her lips.

"I was hoping I could maybe... move in with you." I look away from Christians gaze, feeling all the color rise to my cheeks.

"Is that even a question." He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me closer to him. I look up and he leans into whisper in my ear. "I can't wait to get you home." His voice echos home in my head and honestly it wounds amazing. Im just hoping we are not moving to fast. But I need to get Elena off my back and if she sees I am not going anywhere maybe she will back off. We say bye to everyone but Elena. Christian blatantly avoids her, and Mia promises to stop by during the week to have some girl time.

I felt my whole body relax once we get inside the car and Taylor heads towards Escala.

"Are you made?" I say.

Christian raises his eyebrow. "Mad?"

"Yeah, I kinda put you on the spot like that. I know you wanted me to come stay with you but move in... I just didn't know how comfortable with that you would be. I just dont want to stay in that apartment all alone..."

"Anastasia..." He grabs my hand and pulls me to him, he wraps his one hand around my cheek and into my hair. "I never want you to leave my side. I told you I wanted you there with me. You have made me the happiest man in the world." He smiles at me.

"Are you sure?" I shrug.

"Yes." He breaths out. He leans in and kisses me. When he pulls away my lips tingle.

"Okay." I bite my lower lip and slip down under Christians arm and close my eyes. He holds me close and I can feel the heat radiating off his body. I quickly fall asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

**Just a shorter chapter of more a more loveable Christian,  
** **I plan on bringing out the more dominant side soon.  
** **Thanks for all the reviews. You are all so amazing.** **  
**

 **Thank you for reading!**

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Christian is in his office, I guess he had to finish some paperwork. I don't mind. I need time to think, after we got home last night I went right to bed, I didn't want to talk about dinner because I didn't want to bring Elena up because I don't know how he's going to handle the news. I need to digest it myself. I'm walking around the apartment, looking down on the city through the window. I close my eyes and just breath in, trying to calm myself from the anxiety i feel after last night. If I tell Christian, I know he won't let her do anything that would possibly break us up but from the sound of his raises voice from his office. He doesn't need that stress right now.

I feel two hands wrap over my shoulders from behind and slowly start massaging them. He leans down and places his lips to the tops of my head. "You are being really quiet since last night." He says against my hair.

"We haven't really had much chance to talk." I say quietly. Looking down at my hands in my lap. He shifts away from me and walks around the couch to sit next to me. He is in jeans, a black t-shirt, and black socks. All showered and smells amazing. Me on the other hand am a just rolled out of bed and exhausted. He takes my hand and kisses my palm and pushes some hair out of my face. He looks deep into my eyes and I want to blurt everything out right now but I just... can't.

"Are you upset about your job." He asks.

"No." I say, resting my head against his arm along the back of the couch and look at him.

"Something is clearly bothering you." He says.

"No, no. I'm fine. Don't worry about me." I say and close my eyes, I could easily fall back asleep.

"It's my duty to worry about you. In fact, it seems to be the only reason for my existence anymore." With him saying that I open my eyes slowly and look up at his perfect face.

"Can you promise me something." I whisper.

"Anything." He says while running his fingers down my cheek.

"That you won't let anyone get between us." I look down, unable to keep my gaze on his. He pulls me close into his chest and wraps his arms around me.

"Nothing will ever get between us. I promise you." He says and plants small kisses on the top of my head. His phone in his office rings. I feel him sigh really hard. "I have to get that. I am almost done." He slowly slips away, leaving me by myself in the large room. I take the time to go upstairs to shower and get dressed. In my closet I run my hands along all the different fabrics. I have to get use to all this if I'm going to be staying here. I shower and get ready in record time. I go for some black skinny pants and pale pink lace top. I grab some black flats off the wall of the closet and skip down the hallway, humming. I'm entirely happy being here with Christian. As I get to the top of the stairs I halt. I hear Christian talking to someone by the elevator, the voice back makes my skin crawl.

"Come on dear, just lunch." She says.

"No Elena, not right now." Her name rolling off his tongue sends me chills.

"It was just so good to see you last night. I thought maybe we could talk.."

"There is nothing to really talk about. Please, I will call you next week to discuss the building plans. Now if you will excuse me...Taylor... Will you show her out." I hear the click of her heals. He halts in the middle of the living room and looks up at me, almost like he senses I was there. "Come Ana, let's go have lunch." He says, motioning for me to come down to him. "How long have you been standing there baby?" He says when I meet him in the middle of the room."

"I just got there when you saw me." I lie to him. I just have to find the right time to talk about Elena and now is not it. I wrap my arms around him. He holds me tight. "I'm so happy to be back here."

"Me too." He chuckles. "Want to go get some lunch?" He says. Right on cue my stomach growls. "I'll take that as a yes." He backs away and hold me at about arms length.

"What?" I blush at the way he is looking at me.

"You are so beautiful." He says.

"You are not so bad yourself." I smile at him, he cups his hand around the base of my neck.

"A dim star compared to you." He says. He spins me around the room and ends it with a long kiss, giving me the ultimate butterflies. He runs his hand through the bottom of hair. "If I had things my way, you would never leave my sight." He laughs.

"You would want me handcuffed to you." I giggle and roll my eyes. He pulls me tight to him.

"That's not a bad idea. Don't temp me." He leans down and kisses my neck. His other hand sprawled out along my back. He makes me feel so desired, even here in this room just by holding me. The rest of the day was just as amazing. We went to a restaurant at the top of an all glass building, I could basically see all of Seattle. It was amazing. I couldn't stop looking at the city. It an angle I have never seen it from. Every time I look at Christian he is just smiling at me. After lunch we went for a walk in the park, holding hands, just being a normal couple for a day. Taylor of course lingered no to far behind. Some people may have noticed who Christian was by for the most part, everything was relaxing and quiet. I just wish everyday could be like that. When we got back to the apartment, I just couldn't wait to take my shoes off. When we step off the elevator Christian swoops me up over his shoulder. I let out a hard gasp and giggle. I send an apologetic look at Taylor who is smirking at us. He quickly looks away and Christian carries me into the bedroom. Shutting the door behind him he walks over to the bed and slowly slides me off his shoulder.

"Thank you for today." I smile at him. "It was perfect." His smile could light up the world, I swear.

"Don't move." He says and quickly disappears into his closet. Within a few seconds, but feels like minutes, he is back with a medium size black velvet square box. Wrapped in a silver ribbon. "I wanted to give this to you yesterday but you feel asleep." He shrugs. I shakingly take the box from him.

"You didn't have too get..."

"Stop. I wanted to. I picked it out myself." He says. I could tell he is getting anxious, and the idea of him going and picking come thing for me makes my heart just swell with love. I undo the ribbon, putting it on the end table. Slowly I crack open the box to reveal a beautiful gold necklace. It's a delicate simple chain with a simple diamond threaded on it. The diamond slightly jiggles in place with every movement to reflect maximum shine, it's beautiful and simple.

"You picked this out? For me?" I gasp. My fingers tremble and the slide down the chain and down to touch the rather expensive and large solitaire diamond. I feel as though I shouldn't even be touching it. "It's... beautiful." He takes the box from my hand and removes the necklace, when it hands from his hand the diamond vibrates in place catching all different light from the room. Christian with ease undoes the small clasp. I turn around, pushing my hair over my shoulder giving him better access. His arms come over my head and he places the necklace on my collar bone, it's cold at first. I wait for him to finish the clasp and his fingers trail around my neck, lingering on my skin, I slowly turn around and face him, reaching up to touch the necklace with my hand. I walk past him to the mirror over the dresser. Looking at the necklace around my neck. A piece of jewelry that feels so foreign on me. It looks expensive. To expensive but... perfect.

"It's beautiful Christian." I say, turning around to look at him.

"Now I want to see you only in only that." He says into my ear when he reaches me. He picks me up and I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck. I press my lips to his as he drops me slowly on the bed. His hands firmly on my back. And we make love all night in the moonlight shinning through his grand window. Nothing could be more perfect than what it is right now.

The next morning I wake with a small note on the pillow next to me. _Beautiful, I did not want to disturbe you. Monday has come way to soon and I must go to work. I will be home around six. Don't hesistate to call me if you need anything. I love you. Christian._ He is so sweet. I place the note down next to me in bed. I pull the duvet tighter to my front. I reach up and touch the necklace that hangs right on my collar bone. I still can't get over how simple and beautiful it is. I pull my knees up and place my head on them, looking out the window. The sun hitting my naked back. I think back to last night. He was so gentle and I don't think there is a place on my body he didn't kiss. I close my eyes remembering his lips on my back and his hands sliding down my arms. No one in the world could possibly love someone as much as I love Christian and I want to do something special for him tonight.

* * *

 **(A &C Songs)  
** **"Turning Page"- Sleeping At Last  
** I more feel this is a song from Christian to Ana


	12. Chapter 12

**I figured I would treat everyone with a chapter,**  
 **all your reviews are so kind! Thank you!**  
 **Everyone wanted to see something done about Elena...**

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The day drags, I shower and get dressed. Admiring my new necklace in the mirror, I put my hair in a high pony and make sure to take extra time on my minimal makeup. I can't stop smiling as I swirl around the living room, listening to some music on my iPad. I look down at my watch, 5:45. I hug my iPad and sit in the chair facing the elevator doors. Listening to "Turning Page". Through my headphone I hear the ding of the elevator. I stand up, still holding my iPad. He's early. My smile dims as its not Christian who walks through the elevator, it's Elena.

"Can I help you?" I say as I pop one of headphones out.

"Oh, you'r here." She snickers and her face makes a disgusted look.

"Yes, I told you I live here." I say shocking back. "What are you doing in Christian's apartment? I'll be sure to remind him to change the elevator password." I say, the last part under my breath, an out loud reminder to myself. I don't know if she even heard it.

"You only live here cause you are a homeless little rat. Yes, I know poor Kate moved out so you don't want to be alone. You are so pathetic." Her words echo through the apartment, her heals clicking on the floor as she walks over to me. She's wearing a slim tight black dress with thick black straps and a square neckline.

"That is not true. You need to leave. Right now. I am telling Christian what you did. I'm sure he..." I say.

"He will what? Cut off ties with one of his biggest investment partners. Please little girl. He isn't going anywhere, at least for me." She lets out a laugh that makes me want to hurl.

"Wanna bet?" I say, raising my eyebrow at her.

"Just be a good girl and leave. " She threatens me.

"I am not going anywhere, I left once and it was a mistake." I shutter under her cold gaze.

"You think you can really make him happy? You don't know a thing about what makes him tick. Makes his... body... tick." I literally have to suppress vomit.

"You are a disgusting pig Elena. A fucking child molester." I sputter out. "Leave." I say through me teeth. Tears prickling in my eyes. She looks down at my new necklace and nice clothes.

"You can dress up a pig in Tiffany's, but it's still a pig." She says. 6 O'clock on the dot the elevator door opens and Christian walks through the door, unbuttoning the top of his crisp navy blue suit jacket. He looks like a dream CEO right now, I want to run to him and wrap my arms around him. Just feel his embrace but I'm glued between him and Elena. He quickly gathers the situation and his eyes scan me from head to toe and then strait to Elena.

"I was not expecting a visit from you today Elena." He sets his briefcase down by the island table in the foyer and walks over to stand beside me. Placing his hand on my back. Rubbing it slowly. "What is going on here?"

"Me and Ana were just having a little girl talk." She says all peppy, completely switching her personality.

"Clearly not." He says looking down at me.

"What happened?" He asks me and I look up at him and back to Elena.

"She doesn't want us together." I say, steadying my shuttering breath.

"I just want to see you happy Christian, that's all." She says, reaching forward to touch his shoulder but he steps back.

"Ana makes me happy." He says. "My personal life is not your business anymore Elena."

"She..." Oh god, the tears, I hold them in... "She is the reason I lost my job." I say. I look down and squeeze the iPad in my arms, hugging it close, the song still on repeat in my headphone. Trying to stop my tears but in reality loosing that job is still a soar subject for me. I was really hoping to advance soon there and all the work I did...

"What?" He says looking from me to the witch, "What did you do Elena?" His fingers flex on my back. He turns and stands in front of me, putting his hands on my shoulders. "Hey, baby, look at me." I can't help but slowly skin my eyes up his frame and the perfection of his suit. I look up into his light gray eyes. "Can you please go wait for me upstairs." He kisses the top of my forehead. He lifts up my other dangling headphone and places it in my ear running his thumb over my cheek before giving my a slight nudge on my shoulder to go. I put up my index finger for him to hold on a second, I walk into the kitchen and pull out a bottle of wine, grab a glass, and walk back through the living room. Elena is staring with vicious eyes at me, like a lioness on the prowl. I can almost feel her eyes burning though my skin. I glance at Christian whose is now turned towards Elena, angrily. His eyes meet mine and he winks at me, giving me a half smile. I then leave them in the living room by themselves as I walk up the stairs awkwardly as I know at least one of them is watching me. I have a feeling in my stomach like I'm going to be sick. I don't want those two alone, but I trust Christian and I know he will put her in her place.

It's six thirty and Christian is still downstairs and I am almost a bottle of very expensive, very good wine, deep. I have removed and tried on almost every shoe in this closet, narrowing it down to my favorites. Im sitting on the floor and I take the last sip of wine and twirl the red shiny heel in my hand. This shoe probably cost more than I paid for Wanda back in the day. The thought disgust me but I can appreciate the beauty and perfection of the shoe. Two feet appear in front of me and then he squats down to my level and pulls my headphones out simultaneously.

"I am impressed you managed to finish that whole bottle of wine." He says. I let out a giggle.

"Me too." I say looking at the empty glass in my hand. He placed the shoe on the ground and the glass and helps me to my feet. "What did she tell you?"

"Everything. Nothing you need to worry about right now." He says. My legs feel like jello.

"But I wan't to know how she managed to send that email." I walk out of the closet into the cooler crisp air of the room to clear my head a little from the wine.

"She seduced an intern there and got him to do it." My stomach drops.

"Who."

"She would not tell me." He shrugs.

"I just don't know why she can't let you go." I say. Instantly my eyes flicker to Christian's. He almost looks embarrassed. "I mean," I motion my hand up and down to him, "I know why." I laugh. No one would ever want to let that go. I never truly did.

"She is never going to have me back. She knows that. I really don't know what brought this on from her. It is... unlike her. But she is out of our lives for good now. Do not worry. Please, trust me."

"The other night at your parent's house, she cornered me in the bathroom." I walk around to the windows of the room. "That's why I was so upset. She said if I don't leave you things were going to get worse for me and that she could ruin me." I shiver.

"Ana, I would never let that happen. Why didn't you tell me this Saturday night or yesterday.?" His brows crease. I look him in the eyes.

"Because I didn't want to ruin a perfect weekend. I was going to tell you." I look away, "Just didn't know when."

"I could have prevented this evening from happening if you would of just told me." He says. He walks over and pulls me into a deep hug.

"Yeah, I realize that now." I lean back in his arms to be able to look at him. "What did you do?"

He clears his throat, "First, I told her I am severing all ties of the company with her. In the morning I will inform Ross to pull my money out of our company. Give her full control of the Salons but without my funding. In a few months she will go under no doubt. I no longer have interest in dealing with her anymore. Second, the fact she waltzed in like that and threatened our relationship because of her own insecurities, makes me more angry than anything and you did not need to see that, or hear." He taps my ear and then cups his hand around the back of my neck. "I told her is she sets foot within 100 feet of you I will blow her into her husband about her new submissive Jake."

"She still has submissives?" I gawk at him. He sighs.

"Yes." He breaths out. I know he doesn't want to talk about it anymore than I do.

"How about I cook you dinner. I gave Gail the night off. I thought it would be nice to be just... me and you." I smile.

"How about I cook you dinner, I don't trust you around an open flame right now." I put my my head into his chest and laugh.

"You are probably right." I feel his chest ripple with laughter at my words. We head downstairs and he sits me in a stool while he goes and changes. I place my head on my arms and still my spinning head. I feel his hand on my back. "Tonight didn't go as planned."

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 **Is this the end of Elena?**

DUN DUN DUN...


	13. Chapter 13

**Bonus Chapter!  
I could not wait to post it, everyone has been so encouraging**  
 **it really motivates me to write more.**

 **Thank you everyone for reading and enjoying this story with me!**  
 **-A**

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"I need to find a new job. I will start applying to other publishing houses." I say while cleaning up the dishes after dinner. Christian has been holding back on me, he is an amazing cook. He stands being me, his arms around my waist and his nose in my hair. I am running warm water over the dishes in the sink.

"Not right away." He says while running kisses down the side of my neck. He reaches over and shuts the water off. He spins me around to look at him. "I want you all to myself for awhile." He runs his hands up and down my neck lovingly.

"But.." I start to say.

"No buts about it. I really rather have you here with me, no distractions or stress for you. Let me just take care of you for a little bit." He says. His voice so sweet.

"I don't need you to take care of me."

"I know, and that's one of the things I love most about you but baby, I missed out on a whole year with you because of our stubbornness. Please, let me just..." He pauses and rubs his chin, "Let us enjoy some time together with no distractions."

"You have your work, what do you expect me to do all day. Sit around and wait for time to pass?"

"No, not at all. You have freedom to do as you please while I am at work. There is nothing stopping you from going out." His eyes narrow. "You are not a prisoner Anastasia. You just have to take Sawyer with you. That's all I ask. Your safety is still my main concern." I can hear his concern in his voice but I also can understand where he is coming from. "Would you rather I not go to work?" He says confused and raises an eyebrow. "I could take some time off."

"No. No. That's not what I'm saying," I sigh and close my eyes. "I don't want to become a burden, that's all. Now that I'm jobless."

"Anastasia, look at me." I open my eyes and look at him. "You will never be a burden. Do not ever think that of yourself. What Elena said to you is just her own insecurities talking, okay? And what she did is unforgivable." I look into his eyes and can tell he is speaking from the heart.

"So you don't want me to work because..." I still haven't gotten a solid answer on that question.

"Because I want you clear minded and relaxed as can be without the stress of a job right now. Let me spoil you." His smile could light up the world. He loves the idea of buying me things though it makes me uncomfortable. I mean... I could use some time to sleep in, relax. Maybe read a few books.

"One month." I fold my arms and he rolls his eyes and sighs.

"You don't need to work Anastasia." He sighs. I look away almost in defeat of this argument, I don't want to argue with him, not now. Not ever. "Three months and it's a deal." He whispers in my ear.

"Okay Mr. Grey, for three months you can have me all to yourself. All summer I'm your's." He squeezes me tighter and stand ups strait with me in his arms. He spins me around and sets me on my toes slowly.

"I love you." He whispers. "More than anything in this life." We stay like that for awhile. Holding each other tightly.

* * *

The next morning Sawyer takes me back to my apartment to start packing. When I arrive I am startled to see Jose's truck in the driveway, and Kate's car. I jump out of the car and start walking to the house. Sawyer is quickly behind me, I spin around and put my hand up.

"Sawyer, you don't need to come in with me. I feel bad enough you have to wait here." I say, his face hardens.

"Mr. Grey gave me strict orders to not take eyes off you." He says.

"Well I am giving you new orders to wait out here. These are my friends." I say, crossing my arms. He looks around nervously.

"I will be outside the door if you need me." He finally says.

"Thank you Sawyer."

Inside I find Kate and Jose packing up some of the living room.

"ANA!" Kate nearly drops a box when she sees me. She runs to me and embraces me in a huge hug. "I wasn't expecting to see you today. I'm so happy you are here. We need to figure out what to do with all this stuff." I look around the room at all our furniture.

"Maybe we could donate it." I shrug. I can't see putting any of this in Christians sophisticated apartment.

"That's such a great idea!" She claps. Jose comes out of Kate's bedroom with a box full of stuff.

"Ana! It's so good to see you." He puts the box down and walks over to me.

"Hi." I say and give him a small hug. I'm still slightly mad at him for what he said to me.

"Ana and I have decided to donate everything. Except for our personal stuff." She says. And starts pointing out and naming already packed boxes donate and non donate.

"So your moving in with him, huh?" He says when Kate walks to the kitchen to get us all drinks after some time packing. We sit down on the couch.

"Yeah. It feels right."

"Do you think you are moving to fast?" He says and rubs his knee nervously. I sit back in the couch and cross my arms and just glare at him.

"No, I love him and he loves me." I say. He looks at me intently.

"I don't want to see you get hurt again Ana. I mean, if you would of saw yourself.."

"Yeah I know Jose. I know what I am doing. Trust me, okay. If you want to stay friends you have to just accept me and him are back together. Or bud out, okay?"

He puts his hands up in defeat. "Okay. Okay." Kate come waltzing in with glasses and a bottle of cheap wine.

"This is all we got. Sorry." She shrugs and holds them up.

"It's 5 o'clock somewhere." I laugh. I get up and take the glasses from her so she can pour it. It's bitter, nothing like the wine from last night. But nether less it goes down smooth and quenches my thirst.

"Hey Kate," I ask her while we are in her closet packing her clothes. "I have to tell you something." She stops and slowly turns.

"I um, lost my job." She puts the shirt in the bag and walks over to me.

"Sweetie, what happened?"

I clear my throat. "Well Christian kind of beat up Mr. Hyde for insulting me. It was quite intense really."

"Oh my..."

"Yeah, and because Elena had some intern hack into my email and mess up an order." I wave my hands in the air. "It's hard to explain but Christian caught Jack yelling at me about it and it was just downhill from that."

"Are you okay," she places her hands on my shoulders.

"Yeah, I will be. I'm going to take some time off then find another job. I want to spend some time with Christian. I think we owe it to ourselves."

"So Elena is out to get you? Why?" She makes a twisted face. Oh shit, how do I explain this without giving away Christian's secret.

"She is a long time friend of the family. She watched Christian grow up, it's because she thinks I'm after him for his money and she wants to make me miserable. But if anything...now that I think about it , it opened up my whole summer to spend with him."

"In that bitch's face." She laughs.

"Yeah." I laugh back.

"You can't tell no one though Kate. Christian already rang her out for it and cut off a business partnership they had. I hope it's over now and she is just out of my life for good. She gives me the creeps."

"She does look like an old Barbie. But I promise, I won't tell a soul. I'm happy that you told me Steele. Really, I want to be able to be best friends for life, you can count on me for anything. I mean hell, we could be sister in laws someday." She says as she turns around and puts another shirt into the keep bag. It feels so good to get this off my chest to someone.

"Your always going to be the sister I never had." I smile back. "I just need to know that if I ever need you to back me up, I can count on you. Just in case she does something."

"Why are you so scared of her?"

"I'm not scared, I just don't know exactly what that woman is capable of."

"Do you think she has a crush on Christian or something?" She laughs so hard she snorts. I nervously laugh.

"No no. I just think she thinks she is looking out for the family. They are all very close. Or were... But everyone knows I am not with him because of the money."

"You deserve the best life Ana. Regardless of what anyone says, really. He obviously loves you very much. The way he looks at you, Elliot don't even look at me. Your a lucky girl." I knew I could count on you to make me feel better.

"Thanks Kate. Your amazing."

"Okay ladies." Jose pops in the closet. "All done. You are officially all packed." He smiles. I look down at my watch. Five thirty.

"Shit." I say, walking out of the closet.

"What's wrong Ana?" Kate says following behind me.

"Nothing, Christian gets home at six and I want to be there, umm... I labeled my two keep boxes over in the corner. I will grab them this week. It was so nice hanging with you guys today." I give them each a quick hug. And head out the door. Sawyer still standing in the same spot as I left him earlier in the day.

"Lunch later this week Steele?" Kate calls after me as I am heading out the door.

"Call me!" I yell to her as I walk outside, shutting the door behind me I look guiltily at Sawyer. "Hey."

"Miss. Steele." Sawyer nods.

* * *

He is already in the entrance of the apartment when I arrive back.

"Hey you." I say. "I'm sorry I am late, I got so caught up packing that I lost track of time."

He wraps his arms tight around me. "Sawyer let me know."

"I umm, need a shower." I wiggle away. " I just need a few minutes and I'll be back down." I start walking away but he grabs my wrist.

"Where are you going? The shower is that way." He raises an eyebrow to me and pouts to his room.

"That's your shower." I say.

"Our shower, everything here is yours too."

"But my clothes are upstairs." I raise my hand and point upstairs.

"Tomorrow I will have Gail bring your stuff down. I don't know why I didn't before. That's my fault. Everything here is ours, not mine. Remember that." He leads me to his room.

"Are you taking a shower with me?"

"Yes." He laughs but doesn't look at me, we stop in the middle of the bathroom. He lets go of my wrist and goes and turns the water on. Slowly steam rises in the bathroom.

"But you already look so clean." I say nervously. No matter the amount of time I spend with him, he still gives me butterfly's. He looks at me and raises an eyebrow. Slowly undoing the buttons on his black suit jacket. He lays it on the counter and moves to his black tie then white shirt. Letting them fall to the floor. I am literally panting as I watch him undress. He is in just his pants when he walks over to me, still frozen in awe of him. He walks over and runs his hand down my cheek. It was almost like his touch went down through my skin. Electrifying it. I close my eyes and lean into his hand.

"I will never get tired of this you know." I say lightly.

"Well I sure hope not." He says back. Kissing my neck on the other side. I turn and kiss his palm. "Now let's get you out of these clothes." He stands back and slowly peels my shirt up over my head. His lips turn into a large perfect smile.

"Did you have braces as a kid?" I ask. He freezes with my top button and laughs.

"What a random question, but no." He undoes my zipper and pushes my pants down till I am just in my bra and underwear.

"I did and it sucked." I shutter at thinking about how awful those two years of high school where.

"Well it was worth it wasn't it?" He say. He lifts up my chin so I look at him. "I bet you looked cute," he smiles and let's out a chuckle.

"I defiantly did not." I frown.

"Well if it's any consolation, I think your smile is perfect." He leans in and gives me a kiss. He steps away and removes the rest of his clothes.

"Sometimes you have to endure the bad for things to get better." I shrug. He looks at me.

"I couldn't agree more." He smirks.

I undo my bra and throw it on the floor along with my underwear. He grabs my hand and leads me into the shower. Putting me directly under the cascading water from the ceiling. It's almost like showering in a warm rain. He stands under the water with me, pulling me flush to his body, his hands on either side of my face, kissing me deeply. The warm water flowing over is. I feel his need for me in his kiss, and I return the need in mine. I surrender myself to him.

* * *

 **I hope everyone enjoyed this lighter chapter!  
Don't worry, drama will arise and get interesting in a few chapters :)**

 **(A &C Songs)  
"Sad Song"- We The Kings ft. Elena Coats**


	14. Chapter 14

**One major part of Fifty Shades is the red room,  
I felt it important to address that.**

 **Thank you for reading and all your kind reviews!**  
 **Keep em' coming!**  
 **-A**

* * *

While Christian gets ready for work the next morning I sit at the kitchen counter with Gail. I couldn't sleep last night, every time my mind flashed to sleep mode... I kept seeing the red room. I tossed and turned all night, images of leather floggers and handcuffs. I woke up from one of the episodes with my whole body on the brink of an orgasm. I still can't explain it but I know there is something I must do. I feel a warm hand slide over my shoulder. I close my eyes and shake my head to clear my thoughts.

"You should be in bed." He says. His fresh cologne fills my nostrils.

"I can't sleep." I stare into my tea as he sits down next to me.

"Is there anything I can do?" He asks. He rubs his one hand on my back. I look over at him and place my hand on his leg.

"No, no. I'm fine. Go, you are going to be late for work." I fake smile at him and then rest my head on my propped up hand.

"I don't have anyone to yell at me." He winks. "I could stay."

"I'm fine, really. I'm going to go lay back down right now."

"Call me if you need anything, I'll come right home. Rest, that's an order." He stands up and kisses my forehead, his fingers brush my cheek. "Gail, make sure she rests."

"Of course Mr. Grey." She says politely.

"I love you." He says to me as he buttons his royal blue suit top.

"I love you to." I smile at him and watch him walk out the kitchen. It remains quiet until the elevator doors shut.

"Is there anything I can make you Ana?" Gail asks.

"No, but can I um... have the keys to the room upstairs." I blush, embarrassed.

"Of course." She unlocks a small set of keys off her waist and walks them over to me. She places them on the counter next to me and walks back around. "This not might be my place to say but he hasn't been in there since you left."

"He hasn't gone inside? Why?"

"Well dear, that's not for me to ask." She turns around nervously and starts fiddling with some silver wear in the sink. I slide off the stool and leave the kitchen, saving anymore embarrassment on either side.

I freeze outside the playroom door for a moment before making my way inside. I am nervously shaking. I don't know what type of memories are going to flash back once I enter in here. I turn on the light and the red engulfs me. _Should you really be doing this?_ My inner goddess growls at me, something I have not felt in a while. I shut the door and walk forward into the room. The walls were just as vivid as I remembered. They were the color of pain and pleasure. My insides instantly intensify. A fire inside of me ignites unexpectedly. I reach down and put my hands over my stomach.

"Woah," I was not expecting to feel this way. I thought I was having bad dreams of this room, but maybe it was dreams of pleasure. I run my hands over the red satin sheets. Closing my eyes, remembering when Christian made love to me on this bed. I look up at the shackles hanging from the ceiling. The intensive orgasm I felt hanging from there, my legs around his waist. Releasing myself to him was empowering. Allowing him that much control over me, allowing him to do as he pleased in here, was...hot. He was hot.

I run my hands down the tall wooden post and over the cuffs hanging from one of the corners. I bite my lip thinking about how it felt to be so vulnerable to him. I didn't think I would miss it, I thought maybe I was afraid to come back in here in fear of reliving the pain I felt in here. But my body misses this room and the different type of pleasure I endured. I miss. My eyes fall to the whips and canes on the wall. I shutter. I defiantly don't like that stuff.

I sigh heavy. What would Christian think of all this... if he hasn't been in here in a year did I scar him from ever wanting this again. I want some of this though because it was part of the reason I fell in love with him the first place. There could never be a man who makes me feel more treasured than him. Make my body feel the way it does when I'm around him. I want this part again but with boundaries.

I quickly leave and close the door. I give hail back her keys without trying to make eye contact. I shouldn't be so ashamed but yet I feel like that is such a private thing, even though he told me Gail goes in there to clean it. Which makes this even more awkward.

"Mr. Grey mentioned bringing your clothes down here. Would you like to help me so you can show me how you want it?" She says, I finally have the nerve to look at her.

"Yeah, that sounds great." My stomach growls. "But first. Breakfast."

"Right away."

* * *

I literally leap into Christian's arms when he gets home. He just has enough time to drop his briefcase before he catches me. I wrap my legs around his waist and lock my arms behind his neck.

"Hi." I leans in and kiss him. I pull away smiling.

"Hi baby." He says. I slid out of his hold to my stand on my tippy toes and wrap my arms tight around him to hug him. "I missed you."

"I can tell. A man could defiantly get use to this." He smiles. I pull away but keep my hands locked behind his back. His hands rubbing my shoulders lightly. "You look better."

"I feel better. Gail and I moved my clothes down here and I took a nap." I let go of his back and he takes my hand and leads me to near the couch. He removes his jacket and sets it on the back of the couch. I love watching him go from professional to relaxed. He rolled up his sleeves and loosens his tie. Is it proper to lust after him the way I do. I can't believe he is mine.

"I have something for you." He says while leading me to his office.

"Stop getting me things." I pout.

"No." He looks at me and says with a strait face. "You have to accept that part of being with me. Its new for me and I actually quiet enjoy it." He opens his office doors and let's go of my hand in the middle of the large room while he walks over to a tall wooden cabinet built into his wall of shelves and books.

"But I don't need anything." I say. He takes out two flat white boxes. One smaller than the other. He balances them in one hand so he can close the door.

"I thought about what you said about just sitting here..."

"I didn't mean it like that." I say, I hope he didn't take it offensively.

"I know what you meant," he smiles. He stands in front of me and hands me the boxes. I take them but not without giving him a disapproving look. They have a little weight to them but they are fairly light. I walk over and sit down on a black leather couch nearby. I set the boxes next to me and pick up the smaller top one. I open it, inside is an slim white iPad mini. I pull it out of the box.

"This is perfect." I smile up at him. "But I have one." Not as nice as this one.

"It's loaded with 15,000 songs."

"I couldn't even listen to that many songs in my whole life." I say. He laughs and points to the second box. I could give my other iPad to Ray now so we can FaceTime. I wonder if Christian knew I was planning on getting Ray one myself.

"Thank you Christian." I say before setting down the sleek new iPad on the couch. I grab the other box and slide the top off, inside is a large white Apple laptop. I don't even think these are on the market yet. I pull it out all the way and slide my fingers over the smooth metal material of the outside. I look up at him and he looks worried, like I don't like it. I look back down at the new laptop, I open it and admire the newness of it. I doubt anyone's hands have touched this it's so new.

"It's linked to your iPad so you will always have all your notes in one place." He says after a few moments of silence.

"It's really great, thank you Christian."

"In the big box is also some headphones you should like." He points to the box. I close the laptop and reach over and grab the large headphones. They are pearly white and slide over both my ears perfectly, I could get lost in some mellow music in these. Meant for comfort and sound rather than fashion. I slide them off and look at them. Admiring the big Dre wording on the side. I set everything to the side and jump up. I wrap my arms around him and squeeze.

"They are perfect. Defiantly gives me something to play with." I chuckle. "And here I am trying to do something nice for you." I frown thinking of how could I top any of this.

He brushing his fingers along my cheek. "You don't have to do anything for me. I have everything I need right here." My heart flutters. "Except food. I'm starving and I can smell dinner from here."

"Gail and I have worked really hard preparing it." I smile.

"Have you now?" He takes my hand and we head to the kitchen.

* * *

"Do you miss it?" I ask him, I'm sitting Indian style in the middle of his bed after our night shower, I'm comfy in some black sweatpants and my SWU university shirt I grabbed from earlier today. It makes me feel more, me, wearing this than the fancy clothes and nightgowns. Though Christian is disapproving of my old clothes.

"Miss what?" He says as he emerges from the closet in grey pajama pants.

"The red room?" I feel awkward for asking but we need to have this talk. Everything has been so vanilla that I'm worried he is he is holding back because I can't handle it again.. He presses his lips together and sighs.

"No." He finally says, his eyes narrow.

"Why not?" I say. Scooting off the bed I walk over to him and place my hands on his bare chest, running my fingers down his abs. He pushes some hair over my shoulder and then runs his hand down my arm.

"Because I don't need that with you." He says. He sighs loudly.

"Do you ever want to do that with me again though?" I ask. He arches his perfect eyebrow.

"Do I want to? Well... Yes. But do I need to? No." My inner goddess purrs.

"What exactly do you want to do to me?" I say, I stand on my tippy toes and run my fingers though his hair. He grabs my hips and stills me.

"What are you getting at?" He says. I stop and plant my feet flat on the ground.

"I'm just saying there are things I'm willing to do and thinks I'm not." I don't want to flat out say to him I want to go up there and get flogged. But I would like to go maybe, spice it up a bit. I bite my bottom lip and look away. He grabs my chin with his fingers and makes me look at him, tugging my lip from my teeth.

"I clearly remember what you don't like." He says. "Are you telling me you want to go back in there?"

"I.. I.. I do but I am also scared you will hurt me. That's all."

"I would never hurt you."

"Would it make you happy?" I can see him contemplate his answer, maybe to word it properly. He slowly let's go of my chin, his finger never leave contact with my skin and he trails my jawline, his fingers reach into my hair. His eyes scanning my fave. My senses heighten at his touch, every hair on my head stands up to his fingers trailing over my scalp.

"I don't want you to leave again."

"I won't. I'm not." I say, I back out of his grasp "You think I will leave again?" I wrap my arms around myself. "Do you really think that?"

"No. But there is always that possibility though I hope it will never be a reality. I can't..." He swallows hard. "I can't loose you again Ana. I just can't." He walks towards me and grabs my face. "Being with you makes me whole. You.. just as you are. I don't need all the chains and whips to suppress some need for control when I am around you." He moves his hands to my shoulders. "On another note. Ties are not out of the question."

"We could start there. Maybe slowly move to more. I mean, I kind of miss the kinky stuff. Not that this isn't..." I feel the heat rise to my cheeks and turn pink. "Amazing." I look away. He chuckles loudly.

"That it is."

He pushes me onto the bed, I let out a giggle as he crawls on top of me, hovering above me with his weight in his elbows. He starts kissing me. I grab his face in between my hands while he shifts his weight so he can trail his hand up my shirt.

He cups my breast in his hand and then he stops and slowly slides his hand out of my shirt. He pulls away from our kissing.

"Do you think I will not want you if we don't go back in there?" I drop my hands off his face to beside my head. Its like sometimes he can read what I am thinking.

"No, I just..."

"You doubt my genuine love for you?" He breaths.

"No. No." How did this conversation turn into this. I sigh. "I know you love me Christian but I also know you can't just give up something you..."

"Did Anastasia. DID." He cuts me off. He's still hovering over me. He is resting his body in between my legs ignites a fire deep down, but I suppress it. Now is not the time. "I gave that all up a year ago when you walked out on me. I am not the same man and I don't want to risk loosing you again."

"The whole point of this conversation was for me to get you to take me in there." I cover my eyes. Embarrassed. He shifts his body so his one knee is between my legs so he can move my hands off my eyes. I keep them shut.

"You want me to take you in there?" I open them, first staring at the ceiling, I slowly turn and look at him.

"With boundaries and lots of hard limits." I roll out of his hold onto my stomach. It churns from embarrassed even though nothing should embarrass me in front of the man. He reaches over and rolls me back onto my back. My hair sprawling out around me. He moves a few strands off my face.

"I don't need that to make me happy. I want you to understand that."

"I do understand Christian." I sit up. "I want it though, but not as your submissive. When we were in there I felt... alive. More alive than I ever had. So close to you and yet so free. I just don't enjoy the pain aspect. The torture. I don't want to be punished." I look out the window. I regret bringing this up now. "It's a compromise." I say to him. Thinking back to our first conversations at the Heathman.

"Yet it is." He leans back and puts his hands behind his head and looks at me, raising his eyebrow and smirking. He lets out a huff.

"You never stop amazing me Miss. Steele." I roll over to straddle on top of him. He moves his hands to my hips.

"I went in there today."

"In where?" His expression changes before I even answer.

"The playroom."

He sits up and wraps his arms around my waist. "You did?"

"Yeah, I was... curious." I shrug. "Because I had dreams about it."

"What kind of dreams?"

"At first I though they were nightmares. I felt pain, fear, and being so helpless." He flinches at my words. "But when I went in morning I didn't feel that at all. I felt.." I blush and look away. He puts his palm against my cheek and turns me to look at him.

"What did you feel?"

"Pleasure." I whisper. His eyes scan me like he is looking for the answer on my face. He presses his lips together and sighs.

"Okay. I will take you in there, but not as my submissive. Purely for play." He leans in and kisses me. My hips flex against his, I need to unleash this growing desire for him. Our kisses are deep and passionate, his fingers digging into my back through my shirt. Slowly he lowers me so he is flat on his back. He tightens his grip and flips me onto my back. He hovers over me but when I see his face he has the smile of a boy on Christmas. He sits up straddling me. He grabs the hem of my shirt and pulls it up my stomach and I put my arms strait over my head but he stops when the shirt reaches my eyes. Pinning my arms up and me blindfolded. He trails kisses down my stomach until he reaches my sweatpants line. "Is this what you want?" He says, his hot breath against my stomach.

"Yes." I moan and get my mind gets lost in an endless sea of Christian.

* * *

 **I hope you guys liked my interpretation of how the red room  
would be brought back into the relationship.**

 **(A &C Songs)  
** **"Addicted"- Saving Abel  
** I feel this was very appropriate here


	15. Chapter 15

**I know I haven't had any BIG scenes in a few chapters**  
 **and those will come I promise. I think in the beginning it's important**  
 **to reconnect them before testing their relationship...**  
 **not just yet.**

 **As always, I want to thank everyone for reading  
and letting me know what they think.  
I am trying my hardest to express my story  
through my eyes and I hope I am meeting peoples standards.  
I love your reviews!  
-A**

* * *

I am waken up in the middle of the night by some soft melody floating through the air. A sound I haven't heard in a long time. Christian playing the piano. I listen to the music for a little bit before slowly pulling myself from the bed. I put on my sweatpants, a t-shirt, and head for the sound. He doesn't see me at first, I linger in the corner. The room only lit by a small dim light in the corner. He pauses when his eyes catch me.

"Don't stop." I walk over and sit next to him in the bench. "Please." He nods once and continues to play. The music is calm but the overall feel of it saddens me. I just close my eyes and listen. He stops after a while, I slowly open my eyes, half asleep sitting up. "That was beautiful."

"You like it?" He says gently.

"I love it. Could you teach me?" He looks puzzled at my question.

"You want me to teach you to play the piano?"

"Yes, I have always wanted to play though I doubt I will be any good." I shrug and he looks at me for a few seconds. In these few second in the dim light of the living room I admire his perfect features, thinking clearly I must be dreaming.

"Okay. Let's start with the basics." He cracks a smile and grabs my hand. He puts my index down on a key.

"F." And with that emerges a side of Christian I have not seen. A gentle and very intimate side of him that I am not sure anyone has ever seen. He is delicate with his hands and his beautiful voice fills my ears with talk of harmony. I will ask him for piano lessons every night to see this side of him. At some point in the night I fall sleep on his shoulder.

* * *

The next morning my eyes flutter open and I am much to warm. I try and move but the weight of Christians heavy arm on my body stops me. He rubs his nose into the back of my neck. I look at the clock. Eight thirty.

"Shouldn't you be at work?" I whisper.

"I am taking you somewhere." He says. I spin around in his arms so we are nose to nose. He moves a few strands of hair from my face. I look into his eyes and just take him in, just as he is. Beautiful and relaxed his copper hair in slight curled on his head.

"Really?"

"I couldn't help but think we haven't had much alone time together." He sighs.

"I uh.. agree." I hadn't really thought about it since he came back into my life that we haven't had a lot of alone time. "Where are you taking me?" I giggle.

"It's a surprise." He kisses the top of my nose and then my forehead.

"Can I get a hint?"

"No." He smiles, his eyes look between mine. "I want to wake up to you everyday for the rest of my life Anastasia Steele." He says and runs his fingers down my face and he rolls on top of me. "There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think about you. Worry about you." I frown.

"You worried about me?" I cock my head to the side. He's propped on his elbows just enough that his hands can reach my head, his fingers dig into my hair. I feel his grip tighten slightly.

"Of course I worried." He says and presses his forehead to mine.

"But I wasn't yours to worry about anymore, you didn't have to waste time thinking about me." I frown at him.

"I never let you go Ana. I hoped everyday you would come back." He sighs and pulls away to look at me his eyes quickly glance to the clock. "Come on, get out of bed. We have to leave in an hour." He slides away leaving a lingering warmth for only a millisecond before I am wishing he would just crawl back into bed with me. I sit up and look at him.

"I never let you go either." I say low but he hears me. He stops before the closet door and looks back at me, his eyes don't match his smile. I decide to change the subject. "So no hints, huh?" I pout.

"Nope." He shakes his head. "Gail already packed for you."

"Packed? Are we going somewhere overnight? Surely you didn't have to miss two days of work for this. Couldn't it have waited till the weekend?" What could Christian possibly be planning?

"Anastasia, just so you know I have not taken a day off of work in over 10 years. We will be gone till Sunday night."

"Don't you get sick?"I say crawling out of bed and stretching. Following him into the closet which now is rearranged to fit my clothes, though I feel a slight ping of guilt for taking over half of his closet.

"No." He says as he changes and dresses in dark jeans and white shirt. I catch myself looking at him for to long and turn my attention to the clothes. I hear him chuckle behind me.

I dress in a creme top and black jeans with creme flats that have delicate flower designs on them. I grab a black cardigan and go into the bathroom to fuss with my hair. When I come out of the bathroom Christian is putting his wallet and phone in his pocket.

"Ready." I say, slapping my hands on my sides and popping my lips. He looks up at me for a split second and looks back down at his watch. But then he looks up and really looks at me from head to toe. It's like the first time he didn't get a good enough look. It makes me feel... desired. "Don't look at me like that." I giggle and shy away.

"Anastasia, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on." He says as he stalks toward me. His strides even and strong. He comes and grabs my chin and makes me look right at him. His jaw clenched and his eyes narrow. "You deserve the best life Anastasia and I am going to give that to you." He slightly cocks his head to the side.

"Why me? I'm just ordinary." I shrug. "I mean it's no wonder Elena thinks I am with you for the money." I look away.

"Anastasia, look at me!" I jump and my eyes snap to his. His hand wraps around to my back and pulls me to him. His other still on my chin. He looks pissed. "If you ever say anything like that again I will put you over my knee and so help me..."

"I'm sorry." I lift my hand to his face. He instantly relaxes. "I sometimes feel so undeserving of the life you want for me."

"For us, Ana. I want you in every part of my life. I know you aren't in it for the money. You turn pale just from me buying you lunch." He chuckles. He lets go of my chin and runs his fingers through my long hair.

"It's overwhelming. You are overwhelming." I sigh. He gives me his billionaire smile.

"Fifty shades of fucked up." Oh my insides shake and I press my thighs together, but my heart saddens. My fifty shades. He notices the change in my body language and defuses the situation before we end up undressed on the bed. "We better get going before we miss takeoff." He says into my ear.

"Takeoff?" My eyes widen. "We're flying?" I can't wipe the childish smile I must have plastered on my face.

"What's the point of owning a private jet if I don't use it?" He shrugs and smiles back.

* * *

"Five minutes till we arrive at Flex Airport," Taylor says from the front seat to Christian. His hand his over my knee and my hand over his, he hasn't said or done much the ride here except a few glances and a smile. His mind must be preoccupied.

"Thank you, Taylor." He says. I use this as a chance to strike a small conversation with him.

"I have never been on a private jet before." I say looking at him. He's rubbing his chin and looking out the window. He finally turns his attention to me.

"Huh?" He says.

"Are you okay? You seem... distracted." I sigh.

"Everything is perfect." He reassures me, giving my leg a squeeze.

"Okay." I say, knowing damn well he is lying. He looks back out the window. I watch his facial expression for a minute. Hoping to get some clue to what wrong.

"We're here." He says and I finally look out the window to see a large sleek grey jet with an over sized G on the side in white lettering. It's the private jets of all private jets.

"Wow." I manage to say when I exit the car. Christian never lets go of my hand as we meet up with two men and a woman clearly dressed as pilots and the flight attendant. She's sleek, tall, and blonde. Her name tag says Diane, she didn't look like a Diane. Clearly not Christians type though he likes to surround himself with playboy models. Her face tells me she is clearly taken back when she sees me. I feel my body slug a little when I get close and admire her beauty. Actually, they all looks decently shocked when they see me. I am just happy Christian doesn't notice. The pilots and Christian exchange formalities but reveal no destination hints. When we reach the top of the stairs I turn to Christian stopping him dead in his tracts.

"Am I the first girl you have brought on this plane?" I ask. He looks confused for a second.

"Yes, actually. Another first Miss. Steele." He smiles.

"Not even Miss. Robinson?" His face goes serious and he glares at me.

"No, I am a very private man Anastasia. I don't enjoy company. Except when it comes to you, I want your company."

"Oh." I gasp. Feeling a little embarrassed but I needed to know. I turn and step inside. The cabin is large and beautiful. Grey leather furniture with white oak wooden accents. A large television on one wall and two smaller ones on another. "This is bigger than my old apartment," I I sarcastically say, I find myself catching my breath at the sheer clean detail of the room.

"There is a bedroom, in back. I will show you that later. Now sit. We need to take off." A bedroom? Sex I'm the air? I press my thighs together. He smirks when he registers my body shift. He points to a large leather chair. I sit down and he sets down one bag next to me that has all my important stuff in it like my laptop. He sits in the seat across from me and leans forward starts to buckles me in.

"I don't know if I am ready to have you strap me in anything yet." I say. He freezes mid buckle and looks up at me our faces are at almost the same level.

"This is for pure safety. If I had it my way you would be naked in bed with me right now." His voice is low but loud enough for my ears to hear it.

"I like your idea better." I giggle.

"Safety first." He says seriously. Always about saftey with him.

"I know, I know." I roll my eyes at him. The flight attendant interrupts us with a small throat clear to tell us it is time to take off. Christian slowly straitens up, but trails his hand downs my leg and pulls away to sit back in his seat. I feel my cheeks pink. After a while in the air and we are finally aloud to move about the cabin, I finally had enough of his quiet manor so I unbuckle my seatbelt and sit on the edge of my seat. "Whats wrong Christian?" He looks away from the window at me. "What are you thinking about so much you can't talk to me. I feel... shut out."

He sighs. His eyes staring into mine, "I got a text this morning that my family will be joining us Saturday morning till Sunday when it is time to leave."

"And your mad? I don't mind even though I have no idea where we are going."

"But I wanted to spend time alone..." he starts to say.

"Christian, we still have alone time together. Plus, I really love your family. Is Kate going to?" I smile. His mood changes and he stops slouching.

"Yes. Your not mad?" His eyebrow slightly raises.

"No silly." I stand up and move to go sit on his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck. "You want to wake up to me everyday, right?"

His smile could blind someone and his hand around my waist tightens. "Yes."

"Then we have plenty of time together." I move my hand to the side of his face and plant a wet kiss. I feel his smile against my lips and he scoops me into his arms and stands up. Causing me to gasp a little.

"I promised I'd show you the bedroom." He whispers.

* * *

 **Is someone else unsuspected going to show up for the vacation...**

 **(A &C Songs)  
"How Will I Know"- Sam Smith**


	16. Chapter 16

**I love all these amazing sweet reviews from everyone, you are so kind!  
I know I have some spelling mistakes, especially in the first few chapter which I intend to fix.**

 **Someone has pointed out that I lack "sex scenes". Okay, I have to give my honest answer in case anyone is wondering. I don't think the whole book should be based on SEX. It's about being a couple, growing as one, and the ups and downs. This is not s porno and for those of you who rather read that I am sorry. There will be some scenes, don't get me wrong... I love me some sexed up Christian Grey. But I feel it's about much more than that. So that's why I choose to sometimes end where I do. I am sorry if that upset anyone. With spending less time on every sex scenes I can focus on the real nature of their relationship, which is everything from communication to control.**

 **I also can't wait for Christian to sink his teeth into the vile Elena ... when the time comes.**

 **Also, I have been updating my Pintrest, and a lot of this chapter I did because I wanted people to visualize where they are.**  
 **The exact house from this scene is on there but also just other ideas of the house they are in.**  
 **\- StarshipLight-**

* * *

A sudden jolt wakes me up, I sit strait up in bed. Disoriented. I feel a weight shift next to me and his hand touches my hip.

"It's okay baby, it's just some turbulence. It will pass in a few minutes." His sweet voice says. I rub my eyes, oh yeah. I forgot I'm on a plane because this is far to comfortable. I look over to Christian who is setting his laptop down on a close chair and walking back to bed. He is in pajama pants and clearly hasn't slept since our sweet vanilla sex last night.

"I couldn't remember where I was for a minute." Another jolt rocks the plane and my hands shoot flat to my sides to steady me. "Whoa."

"It gets rough near the mountains." He laughs and jumps on the bed on all fours. He's being clearly playful and adorable.

"Are we safe?" I tilt my head at him. He takes one move closer to me. Shifts each limb only a little like he is about to pounce. I have never seen this Christian, so playful.

"Well I have hired the best pilots and we are in the safest private jet money can buy. So I assume yes." He says and shifts one more time a move closer. He's close to my feet but I'm hidden under covers so he has a few moves to get to me.

"Only the best for Christian Grey." I roll my eyes.

"Did you just roll your eyes at me." He slightly tilts his head and makes another move closer. My skin is crawling with goosebumps. "I have been letting that slide but maybe I need to remind you what happens when you do that." He narrows his eyes at me. I duck under the covers for protection and start giggling. I feel him shift and he's on top of me. The cover is the only thing between us. A sudden jolt sends him over onto the bed. I sit up from under the covers catching some air. It was hot under there.

"Alright baby, time to get dressed and back to your seat. I won't take any chances." He says sliding off the bed and taking me with him into a standing position. Certainly to rush me along. I stand there in my bra and underwear and pout at him. He catches my look. "What?"

"You haven't slept." I put my hands on his arms to still him for a second.

"I had some work to do and plans to finalize." He says. He grabs my clothes from around the room and hands them to me. "Here, get dressed." He pulls on his shirt and changes out of his pajama pants fast.

"Do you ever sleep?" I ask while getting dressed. He finishes putting on his last shoe and straitens his shirt and looks at me with a smug look.

"When I know your safe in my arms. On the ground." He says, his words warm my heart but this man needs some sleep.

"Well remind me the first thing to do when we get there, where ever there is, that I take you strait to bed." I point at him. He smiles wide and walks towards me his eyes glaring into mine. He wraps his arms under mine and hooks his fingers around my back.

"Is that an order?" He laughs but without warning a jolt sends my knees buckling and he tightens his arms to hold me. He pulls me strait up, he has much better balance that I do. "Seat. Now." He says sternly and leads me out of the bedroom.

"So mountains, huh?" I crinkle my nose at him.

"Mhm." He hums between his lips.

After the turbulence seems to settle I look out the plane window. We are descending from the clouds. I feel my mouth gape open while watching all the beautiful snow covered mountains in view.

"Wow. That's beautiful." I feel Christian put his hand on my knee. I turn towards him wide eyed, "Where have you taken me Mr. Grey?" He presses his lips together debating on if he should answer. He just shrugs at me.

"Away from reality." He finally says.

"Being with you doesn't feel like reality Christian. I still feel like I'm going to wake up from this dream back at my apartment, alone." I say looking back to the window. We are descending fast. In the distance I can see heavy snowfall clouding the sky. It's breathtaking. I peak a quick glance at Christian who is is frowning and rubbing his chin, his eyes meet mine right away. He winks at me just gesturing everything's okay without having to say a word. That's Christian's way of coping with something he hears that he doesn't want to hear.

Before exiting the plane, Christian stops me. "Wait here." He disappears into the back of the bedroom and emerges with a winter jacket, hat, and gloves. "I do not want you to get sick." I just give him the 'I'm mad you keep buying me things' look but instantly feel warmer as I put on the new creme color double breasted button peacoat. It hugs my waist with a thick belt, the material is thick and soft, it even has a large hood. Christian ties the belt in front tight.

"I have never seen a more beautiful coat. This is defiantly my new favorite." I smile at him. I do a small twirl and he smiles at me, grabbing my face between his hands.

"Your adorable." He kisses my lips with a swift peck. He puts the hat slowly on my head, making sure my hair is perfect he then hands me my gloves so he can slip into his own coat.

"Where are we?" I say just as Taylor opens the door plane door. A gust of cold wind hits me hard, but I'm thankful for my new coat.

"Aspen." Christian says into my ear. His eyes look out the door so I follow with mine. In view are the most beautiful mountains I have ever seen, actually they are the only I have seen but I can't picture it getting more beautiful than this. We are at a small airport in the middle of what seems like nowhere with only a sleek black car waiting on the lightly snow covered blacktop. There is a small tower in the background that is the only thing indicating that this isn't just a random strip of tar in the middle of the mountains. Christian grabs my hand and leads me down the steps.

"This is amazing Christian," I beam up at him. The cold air makes me shiver and he frowns. We reach the car and Sawyer is loading our luggage into the trunk. Taylor opens the door for us to climb in but Christian motions for me to get in first, he stays outside for a moment and talks with Taylor. I can't hear anything they are saying beyond my teeth chattering. I hope wherever he has planned is not outside. He slides in next to me wrapping his arms around me instantly. When the door is shut I start to warm up a little in the car.

"You will be warm soon baby."

"How far till we get to the hotel?" I snuggle under his arm.

"Maybe I should of picked someplace warmer." He sighs. I pull out from under his arm and look at him.

"No, I love the snow. I just rather look at it more than be in it. I get cold so easily. The mountains here are beautiful. I want to see more." I say and give him a reassuring kiss. His lips are soft and warm against my cold lips. His hand molding to my cheek. I pull away and blink up at him.

"We will be at our destination shortly." He says and tucks me back under his arm. In a few minutes when my body isn't shivering from the core I move from under his hold and look out the window. It's completely serene. Everything covered in a beautiful white blanket of snow.

"I have never seen something more perfect." And from the corner of my eye I swear even Taylor is smiling at my reaction. "I don't know if it gets any better than this." I smile at Christian.

"Me either." He says and he is rubbing his chin grinning at me. Is he talking about Aspen or Me. Soon in the distance I spot a beautiful log house, three stories from what I can see. It's built into the mountain so perfectly. The back walls are all glass overlooking the most perfect view of a frozen lake in the distance and mountains that go on for days. Some of the lights are on side from what I can see, illuminating a romantic soft orange glow. Smoke pumps slowly from a chimney on top.

"Whoever lives in that house is so lucky." I look back at Christian who cocks an eyebrow.

"I happen to know who lives there." He smirks.

"Oh, have you seen it from the inside? I bet the view is..." I look back out the window, "... perfect."

"It is." He says and the house disappears in the trees as the winding road goes deeper into the mountain. I relax back into my seat, fumbling with my new cloves. The stitching is beautiful, these probably cost more than a months worth of rent in my apartment.

"How is your family getting here? That seemed like the only way in or out." I ask. I just want to hear his voice in the silent of the car ride.

"They will arrive in my parents jet, like I said, I don't like company in mine. It's mine." His eyes narrow at me. His thumb grazes his lower lip while never looking away from my eyes. I blush thinking about what I want to do to that lower lip.

"Five minutes sir." Taylor announces from in front of us, breaking the sexual tension.

"Good." Christian announces. I can't wipe the smile off my face, thinking about having Christian all to myself. "If I knew taking you away would make you this happy, I would of did it a year ago." He says, leaning over and kissing my cheek. We pull up to a log cabin from a winding road. I know he's examining my reaction to tell if I love it and of course I do. It's strait from a winter edition of Home & Decor. The large cabin is three stories tall. It looks familiar and it isn't until Christian says, "I told you I knew who lived here," that I recognize it. The large frosted glass wooden double doors surrounded by 4 large pullers that form a porch. The windows are large but I can't see inside due to the curtains drawn. It's absolutely amazing, I wish I could live here full time.

"You own this place?" I gape at him. He nods. "What happened to staying in a hotel? Christian this house is amazing." He straitens his jacket and puts his hand on the car doorknob.

"I never said hotel. You did." He gets out of the car and walks around to open my door. I listen to his feet crunching on the snow, there is more here than the airport and it has started to snow heavy. He opens the door but instantly his brows press together when he looks at my delicate flats on my feet. He shakes his head and bends in the car, scooping me into his arms, causing me to let out a small squeak.

"I would have dressed for the occasion if I knew where we were going." I giggle and burry my face in into his neck to block out the cold. He sneezes me tighter while making the way to the entrance. Sawyer opens the large door and I am instantly surrounded by warmth. The smell of cinnamon and pine filling my nose. I peak out from Christians neck and he slowly lowers me to my feet, the floor is a beautiful solid dark oak running parallel down the open foyer surrounded by a grand staircase. My eyes can't soak it all in.

"Make yourself at home, I will be right back." He says, brushing my cheek with his fingers. After he goes outside and shuts the door I walk strait over to the wall of windows. Christian has a thing for big scenic views so this doesn't surprise me. I pass by a large stone fireplace, already lit and warm. I close my eyes and inhale the warmth before turning my path back to the windows. I stand in front of the view, eyeing everything I can at once. I slowly remove my gloves and hat, shaking out my warm head. My hair is probably quite a sight right now. I run my fingers through it and then start working with the buttons of the jacket. This is so much different from anything I have ever own, I can't wait to show it to Kate. She will want one which will lock in what I'm getting her for Christmas now. I lay it over a large chair near the fireplace and walk over to the warm flame. On top of the mantle are various vases, I'm sure some designer just picked these up for looks. I can't see Christian picking vases. I run my fingers over the delicate porcelain, it's expensive. I instantly feel I shouldn't be touching them and pull my hand away. With my clumsiness I'll break at least one thing by the end of the weekend. In the corner by the window is a large white grand piano. I laugh to myself, the white is very fitting for this place. Reminds me of what's outside. I press down the key I remember as F and the sound echoes through the room beautifully. My heart starts beating fast thinking about Christian sitting in this great big house alone, playing here. Tears fill the corner of my eyes but I blink them away.

The large door opens and Christian steps in with Taylor and Sawyer, cold air sweeps through the large great room. I watch as he shakes the snow out of his copper hair and runs his hands through his soft short curls. His gray eyes look up and meet mine, I have to turn away to keep from my knees going weak. I put my arms around myself and rub my arms turning back to the warm flame, rubbing my face with my hand. I hear him walk behind me and toss his coat next to mine. His arms engulf me from behind, his nose in my hair. He feels warm, like home. I don't need the fire to warm me up, just Christian. I glance down at his watch, it's three in the afternoon. The drive here was longer than I thought and with it so snowy and gloomy out it feels later. I spin around in his arms.

"I really like it here." His hair is still damp from snow and it glistens in the glow from the fire.

"Me too though I don't get to come nearly as often as I want to."

"It's so secluded here. No city of people under us." He smirks at me.

"Indeed Miss. Steele. I have you all to myself and I don't plan on letting you go at all." He tightens his arms a little. I lean my head on his chest and listen to his heart through his shirt, placing my hand on his collarbone.

"I'm not complaining." I murmur. Soaking in the warmth.

"How about a hot bath?" He says into my hair. I instantly perk up at the thought of lavender soap and Christian in a hot bath. I beam up at him.

"That sounds so nice right now." He pulls away from me and takes my hand. I follow him up the broad staircase but when we get the to landing he turns and goes up another staircase and leads me all the way down the hall to a set of doors. The biggest doors in the hallway.

"I have never shown anyone my room here before. My family is not allowed in here. Only the housekeeper Martha who is around here somewhere."

"Is it another playroom?" I blink up at him.

He leans down and brushes teeth along my earlobe, "As much as I want you in my playroom right now, No." He pulls away and looks at me. "No playroom here. I would have never brought a submissive here. It's... to intimate. But you were never a submissive and one day I hope your more than just my girlfriend." His words sending chills down my back into my core. "Close your eyes." I do as he says. I him rattle with a set of keys. So he keeps this key on his at all time? The door clicks open and Christian slowly leads me inside. I instinctively put my other hand in front of me to feel where I'm going but Christian takes it and cups it with my other in his large right hand. "I won't let you run to anything." I hear him say. He stops me after about 10 steps. "Don't move."

"Okay." I start chewing on my bottom lip. I hear the soft start of a fireplace and I feel it against my face, the warmth. I smile. "Can I open yet?" I say about to sneak a peak but Christian stands in front of me.

"Don't you dare." He warns me close in my ear, I smirk at him. I hear the click of his bedroom door, he must be grabbing our luggage. He shuts the door. And I hear him move around a little but before long he is back in front of me. He inhales. "Okay. Open." He takes my hands and I slowly open my eyes. Blinking a few time to focus them. I look around. In the corner is a large stone fireplace that goes from floor to ceiling. The bed is the same color as the floor with a thick white blanket and creme pillows. Across the end of the bed is a fur creme blanket that I really want to wrap around myself right now.

He only has one large lounge chair by the fireplace on top of a very large dark brown bear rug. He really isn't use to having company. There are two dressers and a large chest that rest and the end of the bed. But what really catches my attention is when Christian spins me around, the view from here... A whole wall of glass overlooking the frozen lake and mountains. The snow is now falling harder in large soft snowflakes.

"Wow." Is all I manage to get out. I walk over to the window, placing my hand against the glass and looking down and around. "This is simply..."

"Perfect." He finishes for me but his eyes are looking at me, not the view. I shiver from his glossy stair that sends an urge in my abdomen the just fuck him right here on the floor for taking me away from the city and lights, for allowing me in his room, for doing things with me he has never done with anyone else. For mostly making me feel so cherished. He slips away into a set of wooden double doors and I hear the sound of water turning on. I have to peel myself away from the view to follow him into the bathroom. Its white marble from top to bottom but what really catches me is the tub, its in its own little cubby off the bathroom surrounded by windows in a circle, like taking a bath in the snow. Christian walks over to me and rubs my arms.

"How often do you come here?" I ask, reaching up and running my fingers through his hair. He closes his eyes.

"Not as often as I'd like. Maybe twice a year. If I am lucky." He opens his eyes again. He slowly starts undressing me since the tub is almost full.

"And your family?"

"More than I. I always allow them to stay here though. I refuse to have them in some cramped hotel when I have platy of unused room. I think Elliot comes the most." He removes my shirt and pants, leaving me only in my bra and underwear. He steps back and looks at me from head to toe, licking his lips. "When I talked to my mother this morning I mentioned my plans and she was so eager to get us together as a family she told everyone. They all want to come and spend a night. We have not all been here at the same time since I actually got the place 3 years ago... I never usually tell anyone my plans but she was insistent on us coming over for dinner. She just adores you, everyone does. It is impossible not to love you."

"Well I love your family too. They are so kind and warm." I smile up at him. I think hes reaching around to hug me but he undoes my bra and slowly lets its slide off. My skin erupts in goosebumps. Im now naked in front of him.

"Bath now, I will be back up in a few minutes once I make sure everything is in place." He lifts my chin slowly with his index finger. "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. When I come back I am going to make love to you. The right way."

"We haven't yet?" I tilt my head at him. He shakes his head and his eyes soften.

"Not the way I want to show you tonight. I don't think I have shown you yet exactly how much I need you." He gives me a small kiss and point the tub. He leaves the bathroom after I have eased myself in. Its warm and refreshing all at the same time, warming me from the outside in. The tub is big enough I can almost swim in in. I slide over as close as I can to one of the windows and just watch the snow fall while the smell of lavender fill my nose and I could't be anymore content with life.

* * *

 **I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter of more loving Christian.  
I love Dominant Christian but he is also Prince Charming in my eyes. Trying to whooo the girl.**

 **Please let me know what you think, or suggestions!**


	17. Chapter 17

**SURPRISE!  
a new chapter so soon?  
yes! I can't stop writing...**

 **I know I said I would write in when his family arrives in this chapter,  
** **but i decided to do something else first.**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

After awhile Christian still doesn't come back and I decide I can't stay in the water any longer or I will prune. I leisurely get out and wrap one of the big soft white towels around me and head for my luggage to see what Gail packed. I struggle with the weight of my bag as I drag it closer to the fireplace. I kneel in front of the large white suitcase and click it open. I sit back and look at the variety of clothes, rolling my eyes yes at the name brands. I reach in and start pulling things out until my fingers skim across something satin. I push some stuff out of the way and pull out a long creme colored satin robe. I dry off and put the robe on, tying it around the waist and then towel drying my hair. I walk over to the door and slowly click it open.

I peak out down the hall and I don't hear or see anything so I open the door and make my way to the landing but am startled when Christian is just a few steps down. He smiles when he sees me.

"I'm sorry baby, I had to make a very important phone call before I came back up. Everything is all set now. It's just me and you." He reaches the landing where I am standing. He wraps his arm around me, his thumb rubbing small circles on my back. "You should be in the bath, what are you doing out here." He looks around.

"I was going to shrivel up if I waited any longer." I say and shrug, he smirks down at me.

"Was I gone that long? Hmm..." He scoops me into his arms. "Let me make it up to you." He carries me to the room and locks the door behind him. He slowly sets me on the ground and walks over to the dresser to empty his pockets. He picks up a remote and the room fills with beautiful peaceful piano music. He looks at his phone for a second before powering it off and setting it down. He runs his fingers through his hair and then his eyes dart to me. Almost making me jump. My heart starts pounding.

"What if someone needs you?" I say pointing to the now shut off phone on the dresser.

"The only person that's needs me is standing right here." He says and slowly walks over to me. He cups my cheek in his hand and runs his thumb under my eye.

"Everything is so amazing, Christian. Thank you for bringing me." I smile at him.

"I wish I would of brought you sooner." He chuckles.

"That was the most amazing bath, the only thing missing was you." I frown. He grabs my head between his hands. His fingers in my hair.

"I'm sorry baby, I know work comes in the way a lot." I don't want to ruin the mood between us by talking about work so I reach up and run my fingers along his stubble assuring him it's okay.

"This is hott," I smile at him changing the subject.

"Oh yeah?" He raises an eyebrow at me slightly.

"Mhm, I like it. You should keep it." I reach up and kiss his jawline. The stubble tickling my lips. I giggle slightly.

"Mm, if you do that more I will debate it." He says. He wraps his one arm around my back and the other hand comes to my face. His hands are soft and warm, I close my eyes and lean in. "Thank you for coming into my life my sweet little Anastasia, thank you for giving me your innocence. You leave me speechless in a moment where I want to tell you so much." He looks between my eyes. "I am never letting you go. Do you understand that?"

"I'm not going anywhere Christian. No matter what. I'm yours forever." I reach up on my tippy toes and kiss him hard, wrapping my arms around his neck. I pull away only to catch my breath.

"Forever?" He reaches forward and presses his lips firmly against mine. His kiss means more than air at this moment. He pulls the tie on my robe and it falls open allowing his hand to slides into the rode, his fingers graze my stomach. He smiles against my lips and pulls away, resting his forehead against mine. "Your naked." He breaths. "Mm." He brings in his other hand in and reaches down a little to the back on my thighs. He picks me up and I wrap my legs tight around his waist, the motion causing me to gasp. I'm balancing between my legs around his waist and my hands around his neck, his one hand hold the back of my thigh, his other in my hair. His kisses deepen and I yelp when he bites my lower lip.

My robe hanging off my one shoulder. At this moment it has become worthless but I enjoy the feeling of the silk against my sensitive skin. He walks over the the bed, laying me down on my back without a ever breaking our kiss. By now I'm basically panting for him to take me. He looks down on me after sensing I need air.

"You...leave me... breathless." I laugh and steady my breathing. His face is serious now.

"I have a proposition for you." I tilt my head, I wonder what he could possibly want to negotiate right now.

"Oh really? Right now?"

"Mhm." He hums. His fingers move against my scalp and along my neck. My whole inner body screams for him. "I'll take you back in my playroom on one condition."

"Umm... Is it painful?" I say.

"You really want to go back in there? Are you sure?" I wiggle under his gaze. He is making me nervous.

"I'm sure as long as your gentle and it's not for punishment."

"Marry me." He says, his gray eyes burning into mine. My heart stops, literally stops. "I need to know you won't leave again." He closes his eyes and presses his forehead to mine. Seconds pass, maybe even minutes before I let out a long breath I have been holding.

"You want... to marry... me?" I finally manage to say once my mind catches up to me. He looks down at me and kisses my nose.

"More than anything. If I had it my way we would be in Vegas right now but I want to do this right and I promised your dad I wouldn't do that." My heart is about to beat out of my chest.

"You called Ray?"

"Mhm, who do you think the important phone call was to?"

"I... I..." My hands start shaking. Who am I kidding, of course I'll marry this man, he even already asked Ray. I love him more him than life itself. More than the air I breath I need him. It isn't just about the playroom, I know it's because Christian needs to know I am not leaving him again. He's just as scared as I am to loosing him. Tears start to form in my eyes, one slides down my temple and he slowly wipes it away. My voice is gone so I just nod.

"Say it," he breaths. His hand smooths some of my hair from my face, "I need to hear you say it." I take a deep shuttering breath.

"Yes, a million times, yes." He closes his eyes, taking in a big gust of air. When he opens his eyes back up they are the lightest I have ever seen. He cups my face between his hands and kisses me. His one hand moves to my side and slides down my hip till he's cupping my butt cheek in his hand. He flips me over so I'm straddling him but he doesn't give me any time before he sits up and wraps his arms around me, kissing me vigorously and without stopping. He finally breaks when I grab the hem of his shirt and lift it over his hand. He grabs my face again right away and pulls me back to him.

His warm skin against mine makes me moan. In the background I hear the wind against the windows that makes a low howling, the crackling of the nearby warm fire, and our breathing. Nothing else in the world matters right now except this. I break away to unbuckle his pants, he gets the hint and lays down, his hands behind his head. He watches as I slowly unclasp his belt and shimmy his pants off his hips till he in in just white boxer briefs. Even through his underwear you can tell his package is huge. My eyes widen and I catch a peak up at Christian who has an amused smile on his face. His gray eyes locked on mine. He sits up and flops me onto my back, grinding his erection against me, I start panting again. He runs his nose down the bridge of my nose.

"Breath Anastasia, breath." He whispers. He starts trailing small kisses over my jawline, slowly moving to my neck, then back up to my chin. My insides are screaming for release but I want to enjoy this moment. I close my eyes and just think about how perfect he is, my Christen Grey, and he wants to marry me. He slides off me and eases off the bed. Taking my hand so I am standing up with him. He looks down at my shoulder and raises his hands slowly to push my robe off me. It falls to the floor in slow motion, grazing my skin as it falls. I should feel cold right now but my blood is about to boil over and my body feels flush. "You have such perfect alabaster skin, so soft." He runs the back of his fingers over my shoulder and down my arm, his eyes flicker up to me. "I am going to make love to you now, the way I should of our very first night together. I should of been more gentle, easier." He lifts my chin up and he brushes his lips against mine before tucking some hair behind my ear.

"You were very gentle." I remind him. I reach up and run my hands down his stomach. "I just couldn't touch you then and I wanted so badly to." I shiver at the thought of not being able to hold him or touch him again.

"I was scared." He says, placing his hand over mine, he picks it up and brings my palm to his lips. He looks at me and places my hand over his heart. "Now," he reaches up and touches my face, "now I'm scared of what it would feel like to never feel your touch again."

"I'm not going anywhere." I wrap my arms around him and bury my face into his chest, "I promise." He wraps his arms around me, engulfing me in the aroma of Christian. His warm skin agains my naked body.

"I know," he pulls away to look down at me. He sees the goosebumps on my body pucker up and he lowers me to the large bed. The skin on my back lands on the soft creme blanket that was previously at the end of the bed but now its flipped all over the place. It's so soft and plush, I run my fingers down some that lay near my hip. Feeling the fine hairs tickle my palm.

Christian springs free of his boxers and crawls on top of me. I feel his tip touch the entrance and my insides are screaming to flex my hips towards him but my heart tells me to allow him to take his time. He places his hand on the side of my head so my ear is I between his spread out thumb and index finger. His other hand slide down my ribs, over my hip, across my cheek, and grab softly behind my leg. He slowly eases himself in. I gasp and close my eyes.

"No Anastasia, I need to see you." I open them back up, blinking a few times. I honestly don't know what to do with my hands so I bury them in his hair. Pulling him to me hard so I can feel his lips on mine. He repays me back by thrusting in causing me to throw my head back and cry out. "You feel so good." He says against my neck, grazing his lips up from my ear down to my collar bone. I lay flat down and he slowly start moving. A slow rhythm as his fingers hold firm on the back of my leg. His other in my hair. He kisses me with passion, with meaning, with purpose. I feel his love when his tongue skims mine. There is nothing being forced or thought about. All we want in this moment is each other. He looks down at me while keeping his slow rhythm. "I." Kiss. "Love." Kiss, "You." He whispers in between deep kisses. My fingers are sprawled out on his back, holding lightly on to his defined back muscles. I want to say it back but all I can think about it how amazing this feels and how wanted I feel in this very moment. No woman on earth has probably never felt more loved than I do right now. I reach up and kiss his neck, sending his body into overdrive, he quickens his pace and he grabs my leg harder. I kiss down his shoulder making his hand move from my head to my back as his thrusts get a little harder I feel my body quickening for a release, I need it.

"Mm, I... love... you... Christian..." I say between kisses on his neck. He lets out a loud groan and together we fall apart in each others arms. He collapses on top of me but he is still supporting his weight on an elbow.

"Oh Ana, you completed me." He whispers in my ear. I wince as he pulls out but he doesn't roll off just yet, he runs his hand down my cheek and brushes some hair away from my face. He doesn't have to say anything else. I'm pretty sure we are both feeling the same way right now. My smile probably says it all or the fifty shades of pink my cheeks must be a clue.

He plants a small kiss on my nose and rolls over. I reach down and grab the soft creme fur blanket and pull it partly over us and lay right on his chest, my hand sprawled out over his heart. He lays one arm behind his head the other wrapped around my back drawing small circles on my shoulder. The warm fire crackling behind us, the heat warming my back. We stay like that till I almost fall asleep.

"Wait here." He slips away from me, startling me from the edge of slumber. He pulls his boxers on and walks over to his black bag in the corner. I sit up, holding the warm blanket to my front. He clasps his hand shut and walks over to the end of the bed. God he looks so hot in his underwear. I'm biting my lip and he tugs it free before putting his hand out for me to take. I take it, clutching the blanket to my front. He walks me over to in front of the fireplace.

"Do you want to make love right here on the rug?" I ask him all confused.

"No. Well yes, not right now." He presses his lips together and looks down at me, cupping the side of my head into his hand. "From the moment I met you I knew I couldn't live without you. Your innocence, your beauty, your intelligence. It proved true when you left. I had no reason to live anymore besides work. I vowed that if I ever got you back I wouldn't let you even out of my sight. Your the one Anastasia. The one who changed the way I saw the world and the one who showed me love does exist." He clears his throat and then slowly lowers himself down on one knee. I cover my mouth with my hand and gasp. Taking a step back. Tears instantly pricking in my eyes, even though I already agreed to marry him, I didn't need him to go down on one knee and ask me, I wasn't expecting this.

"Anastasia Steele, will you do me the great honor of becoming my wife?" He says and opens a small black box. Inside in the most stunning ring I have ever seen. I am not about diamonds and jewelry but this blows me out of the water. It's a large oval diamond sitting on top a delicate gold band. It's a lot to take in, it's breathtakingly beautiful with the way it glistens in the light from the fire. Tears fall from my eyes and I am struggling to hold the blanket up and wipe my eyes at the same time. I start nodding.

"Yes. Of course. Yes." I say, he gets up and take the ring out of the small box. My hand is shaking in his as he slides the ring on my delicate left finger. It's a little heavy but it's beautiful. "Christian, it's perfect." I say looking at it.

"Your perfect." He says and wraps his arms around me, we stand there in front of the fire for a lifetime, holding each other close and me sobbing like a baby. After a while he looks down at me and wipes a few tears off my face. He leans down and scoops me into his arms. He carries me to bed, holding me tight till we both fall fast asleep.

* * *

"Mm," I stretch when I finally wake up. The bed around me is cold which causes me to open my eyes and look around. No Christian. I run my hand through my hair and my eyes catch a glimpse at my left hand. I smile so hard I cover my face with blanket. "It wasn't a dream." I mumble into my blanket. The door cracks clicks and I hide under the blanket, I'm still completely naked.

"Good morning sweetheart. I brought you breakfast." His soft voice says. I peak out from under the blanket and my mouth waters, but it's not breakfast I want. He is in a white t-shirt and black pajama pants. He has just fucked hair and the fact he is bringing me food when I am so hungry just happens to be a turn on.

"You didn't have to do that." I say while sliding out of bed and grabbing my robe off the floor. He sets the food down on a small table in the corner, in front of the window, I hadn't noticed before.

"I want you to relax but eating is a priority. Plus, I wanted keep you up here in bed longer." He winks at me. I blush and cover my face. He lays down on the table english muffins, fruit, eggs, and bacon. It all smells so good. I first down the orange juice. I'm so thirty, and the food is filling. Before long my plate is empty and I'm staring out the window. I keep looking down at my new ring. It's completely breathtaking in the morning sun shining in from outside. I look up and Christian is lounging back in his chair, his ankle over his knee, and rubbing his chin. "What are you thinking about?" He asks.

"How happy I am." I smile at him. "And that maybe we should wait to tell people. They might think it's... sudden." I play with the ring on my finger. I nervously brush some hair behind my ear. His eyes are studying my body language intently, I know because he's quiet. I can't bring myself to look at him.

"Are you embarrassed?" He asks. I snap my eyes to him.

"No, absolutely not. I'm just worried, I mean we have only been back together for two weeks. Are you not worried about what anyone thinks?"

"No, my family adores you. They will be happy for us. Ray is happy for us." He grazes his bottom lip with his thumb. I almost choke on my sip of water.

"My mother doesn't even know we are back together." I look into my water glass, not daring to glance up.

"Yeah, I kind of figured when I called Ray. He was quite shocked to hear from me to say the least. It took awhile to convince him my intentions where all genuine." I look at him though my eyelashes.

"I have just had time to digest it myself." I take another sip of water and get up from the table. Christian mimics my actions and quickly follows behind me as I pace the room, chewing on my thumb nail. I spin around quickly and he catches me.

"Breath." He says calmly.

"I just am so nervous. I don't know. I mean I'm happy nervous. Maybe, partially, in shock still. I can't get over it, I mean you..." I blink at him. He strokes my face.

"It's okay Ana." I just nod my head back at him, I'm shaking, reality of last night is hitting me and tears pool in my eyes.

"I just love you so much and it's a lot to take in." I place my hand over his hand on my cheek. He lifts up my left hand kissing the ring and then kissing my hand.

"Well we have all day today and tomorrow morning before my family arrives. I have a few things in mind that I'd like to do." He bends down and presses his lips against mine. He wraps his arms around my back and pulls me tight to him. I hum against his lips. My desire boiling to the surface. I grip onto his back and pull him as close as I can deepening our kiss. I could do this all day.

* * *

 **I hope you guys enjoyed this sweet chapter, not everyone needs some big proposal**  
 **I felt Christian and Ana were both more private people.**  
 **and plus, I pictured this so romantic.**

 **Thank you for all the awesome and sweet reviews,**  
 **you ALL make me smile and encourage me to keep going.**  
 **putting every thought and detail I can in each chapter without boring anyone.**  
 **Thank you for being my support team!**


	18. Chapter 18

**I hope that everyone enjoyed their Thanksgiving!  
**

 **I can't remember what book it was in that Ana finds out  
Elena taught Christian to dance... but I put it in here.**

 **Thanks for reading :)**

* * *

"Checkmate." I say with a wide smile on my face, we are currently in the living room by the fire playing chess waiting for the house maid to finish cooking dinner. I insisted on cooking but Christian was strict and said no, he wants me to relax. I look down at the board and start putting the pieces back in place. Chess is one of the only things I can think of that I am actually better than Christian at.

"Damn, that's three times in a row." He frowns.

"Ray taught me well." I reassure him.

"Indeed he did." He rubs his chin. The song on the surround sound turns to something charming and flowing. "Do you want to dance?" Christian asks. I'm hesitant for a second but he stands up and puts his hand out. I eye him up and down, he is wearing dark grey sweater and dress pants. It's a different, more laid back, look on him. I like it.

"I'm not very good. Remember our date?," I say while taking his hand, "I will probably step on your feet."

"Well then we need to get some practice in before the wedding." He smiles down at me. He walks me to an open section of flooring near the piano. He takes my hand in his, his other goes to the small of my back. "I'll always lead, naturally." He slightly shrugs and smiles. He slowly starts moving his feet around, carrying me along with him.

"You are so graceful." I say up to him. I lower my head and watch our feet move, I try mimicking everything he does but my feet don't always go the way I want them too. I look up at him and give him the puppy lip after stepping on his foot.

"Stand on my feet." He says. I look down and slowly step on each foot. I rest my head against his chest and close my eyes. He slowly moves along to the music. His hand holds me close. He kisses the top of my head and then slowly dips me. When he brings me back up I'm smiling from ear to ear.

"You make it seem so easy." I giggle.

He tilts his head, "You have a good leader, don't worry in no time you will learn. It is easy with practice. I like dancing with you like this though." He says.

"Who taught you?" His face frowns at my question and I instantly know who it was. I step off his feet onto the floor. "It's okay, I don't..."

"Ana." He goes to grab me again.

"No, no, it's okay, I need to go to the bathroom." I turn around and head through the the living room to one of the side hallways where I know a small bathroom is located. Once inside I lock the door and lean against it. Putting my hand over my chest, stiffening a cry. I shake my head slowly back and forth. I don't want to think of her every time I dance with Christian, knowing Elena was the one who taught him. I look down at my left hand and fiddle with my ring. I let out a deep sigh. I mean, I won didn't I? No matter what she does Christian isn't going to leave me because he wants to marry me. He wouldn't ask me if he thought Elena could break us up. I take a few deep breaths, wash my hands, fluff my hair a little, and leave the bathroom. Christian is looking out the window, hands behind his back, and his feet parted slightly. I wonder what he is thinking about.

Christian has not even touched his phone since last night and I am tempted to ask him when he plans on checking in with work, this seems highly unlike him but I enjoy it. I enjoy what it would be like to be a normal couple that didn't have thousands of people relying on him. The floor creaks as I walk into the living room. He turns arounds and looks at me.

"Are you okay?" He asks me nervously. He takes a step towards me but doesn't touch me.

"Yeah, I just needed a second."

"Ana..."

"What? I'm fine." I do not want to talk about her and I'm sure Christian honestly doesn't either. He presses his lips together and takes another step towards me.

"What do you want to do?"

"You pick, but don't pick chess again because I am tired of winning."

* * *

Dinner is tense, I play with my food and don't dare look up. He is staring at me, leaning back slightly in his chair rubbing his chin.

"Why are you not eating?" I don't answer him. "Ana." Tears well in my eyes.

"I'm sorry Christian." I look up at him. "I am just a little overwhelmed."

"With what?"

"Everything is just moving so fast and seriously, Elena scares the crap out of me." He sits up and takes my hand, I go to move my hand out of his but he tighten his hold. "I mean, I lost my job because of her but yet everywhere I look I'm somehow reminded of her. And it's a lot to take in."

He sighs heavy, "Listen, she is a huge part of my past. I can not change that..." He wipes a tear from my cheek, "You are my future. More so than she was ever my past. I never loved her. I never wanted her. I only have loved you and wanted you. Everyone else is obsolete." I sniffle and give him a weak smile.

"Don't forget about your family." I remind him.

"Yes, naturally they are included but even then... you are first. You are my family now. My home."

"I'm sorry, I don't know why I am crying. I'm so happy. I really am." I smile at him. I really am on cloud 9 here. I just have a hard time with her name coming up. I want Christian to know how I feel because I can't hide it. He pulls me out of the chair onto his lap. I wrap my arms around him and dig my head into the base of the of his neck. "I love you Christian."

"I love you Ana. Now will you please eat?" I chuckle into his neck and pull back enough to look at him.

"I'm not hungry for food." He weighs my words in his mind.

"I have created a monster." He smiles at me. "Eat first then I will fill any need you have after that."

* * *

The next morning Christian is waking me up at what seems like the crack of dawn.

"Ana, they will be here in an hour. Come on baby..." He slowly is pulling the sheets away from me.

"No." I pout.

"We have enough time to shower if you get up now." He whispers into my ear. I slowly open my eyes and wait till they are in focus. I roll over onto my back to look up at Christian, he is leaning over the bed with his hands resting on either side of me.

"A shower would be nice." I smile at him. In a flash he shifts positions and is holding me bridal style walking to the bathroom. He sets me on my feet slowly and turns the water on. I pull his t-shirt over my head and stand their naked so when he turns around he gets an eyeful. He freezes when he sees me. Licking his lips.

"Eager as ever." Christian steps away and pulls his shirt off and pants. He walks over to me and crushes his lips to mine. His hand sprawled out and trailing down my back. He picks me up so I can wrap my legs around his waist and we get in the shower. He pins me against the side wall. The warm water feels so good on my sensitive skin, it's almost to hot at first but I instantly get use it. He pulls his lips away from mine, the water cascading down our bodies and our breathing heavy.

"You are everything I need in life Anastasia." He presses his forehead to mine and I listen to his breathing.

"Christian." He pulls back and blinks down at me, "I love you."

* * *

I'm standing by the fireplace, spinning my ring around my finger. The Grey's car just pulled up and I anxious to find out what everyone thinks about our engagement. I let out a deep sigh and I feel Christians arms wrap around me from behind.

"Nervous?" He whispers into my ear.

"Yes." I say, trying to to let him hear the anxiety in my voice.

"They love you, don't worry." He kisses my hair and then walks over to the door just in time for Mia to run inside and throw her arms around Christian almost knocking him off balance. "Thanks for inviting us, I love it out here. Don't you Ana!" She turns towards me and runs with her arms wide out. Spinning me around with her as she hugs me.

I hear Elliot's booming voice, "Christian!" He wraps his arms around his brother and gives him a big hug. Holding him at arms length.

"It's good to see you too Elliot." Christian laughs and pats his shoulder. Kate comes marching in right after, she doesn't even acknowledge Christian, which I find kind of rude.

"Ana, how about you give me a tour of the house." She says serious. Her eyes are very wide.

"Well isn't Grace and Ca..." I start to say.

"We need to talk about..." She cuts me off. She puts her arm under mine and goes to spins me around but her eye catches my left hand. "Is that what I think it is?" And simultaneously I hear two things.

Kate screaming, "Oh my god! You're engaged."

"Christian, Darling!" Coming from Elena.

It's almost like the world went into slow motion right then. Kate whispers, "I was going to warn you." Mia screams in excitement and Elena drops her purse on the ground. Grace comes waltzing in confused.

"What is going on here." She asks Christian. Elena is standing there, frozen and open mouthed. For once she is silent. My eyes meet Christian's and he is just as in shock as I am.

"Well I guess now is the time to announce it, hello mother," Christian walks past her giving her a small kiss on the cheek. He walks over and stands next to me, ignoring Elena. My eyes look back at Elena who is shaking her head back and forth with the look of pure anger on her face. Christian wraps his arm around me, he clears his throat. "Anastasia has accepted my marriage proposal." Mia screams again so loud I jump. Kate rips me from Christians arms and hugs me so tight I can't breath.

"Oh Anastasia. I am so happy for you." She cries. Tears well in my eyes. Mia throws her arms around the two of us.

"Now we will all be sisters." Mia says.

I pull back, "Wait." I grab Kate's left hand and she had a very prominent square diamond on a white gold band. "Holy shit Kate." I hear Elliot and Christian behind congratulating each other. Grace is crying with her hand over her mouth hugging her two boys. I look back for Elena but she has stormed off. Christian pulls me away from the girls into his arms and grabs my face, planting a kiss on my lips.

"I didn't know." He whispers in my ear and then proceeds to walk off with his mother, she stops and turns around. She walks over to me and embraces me in a hug.

"Thank you." She holds me at arms length. "I always told him money can't buy him happiness and I was right, he was never truly happy till he met you. Welcome to the family Ana. Even though you are already like a daughter to me." She kisses my cheek and walks back to Christian who puts his arm on her back. He looks back at me and winks causing me to blush.

"Mom why didn't you tell..." And then I couldn't hear their conversation anymore.

Kate pulls me away from Mia and Elliot who have made themselves at home over by the warm fireplace. We go into another room that has tall bookshelves and a reading nook. There is a large white sofa in the corner covers in various soft blankets and pillows. We plop down.

"I'm sorry Ana, I wanted to warn you. Carrick is sick so Grace decided to bring Elena. Actually Elena invited herself when she found out we were all coming here." My stomach drops.

"She is going to do something to ruin this weekend for me. I wouldn't put it past her. Did you see she just took off?" I pull my knee up to my chest and take a deep sigh.

"I wonder where she went."

"Well it's a big enough house that she could be anywhere. There is a pool downstairs." I raise my eyebrows at her. Her eyes almost popped out of her head.

"Holy shit."

"I know, it's all very overwhelming." I sigh again and sit up. Taking her hand into mine. "Tell me about how Elliot proposed. I'm so happy for you guys."

She goes into a story about how they went to for a hike and he proposed there. Apparently she was already engaged at the dinner last week but she wanted to see how I would take moving out first and everything, I reassure her I would have been ecstatic for her. Her smile tells me a million words, she is beaming with joy. She asks me about how Christian asked me, I basically only say in front of the fireplace. I leave out all the mush details. We talk for a while before Christian knocks on the door frame.

"Ladies." He says and walks over to me placing his hand on my shoulder. He looks at Kate and nods his head, "Congratulations and good luck." He laughs at the second part. Kate rolls her eyes and chuckles.

"Thanks, I'm going to need it. Your brother is quite the crazy one." She stands up. "I'll find you in a little bit. I'm going to go find Elliot and freshen up." She waves bye and leaves me and Christian alone. He sits down where Kate was.

"Baby," he reaches u and strokes my cheek. "Don't let this spoil our weekend. If a storm wasn't about to hit tonight I would send her home right now. Just pay attention to me okay."

"Do you think she will try to get revenge for pulling out of her company?" I look up at him through my eyelashes. I play with the sleeve of my knitted sweater.

"I think her being here is revenge."

"She doesn't look happy about our engagement. Did you see her face?" I say. He chuckles and puts his hand up to his mouth and closes his eyes for a second.

"Oh yes. She looked pissed alright." He laughs again but then gets serious. "Let her. She had no right to even come here.. She keeps getting in the way and it's infuriating because she is my moms friend." My stomach drops and I suppress a gag.

"I'm not going to let it ruin our weekend Christian." I put my hand on his leg and give him a reassuring fake smile. He gives me a worried look. "I mean, it's only one night and obviously she knows your mine." Doesn't she. He just looks at me with his gray eyes, studying my body language. I am trying my best to hide that... really... this has turned into my biggest nightmare. Stuck in a house overnight with a woman who would put me six feet under to ensure Christian doesn't have true real love.

* * *

 **What does everyone think of Elena showing up?  
Don't be to mad, you have not read my well planned out scenario :)**


	19. Chapter 19

**ATTENTION! If you haven't already read, then you are fine.**

 **I posted this up an hour ago but quickly took it down to edit it.**

 **If you have previously read it...**

 **I CHANGED THE LAST SCENE!**

 **As always thank you for reading and all the really sweet reviews.**

 **You guys are the best fan base I could of asked for.**

 **xoxoxo**

* * *

Elena is standing across the island from us, spinning her wine in her glass. Her eyes don't leave me, they are narrow and piercing. Staring into my soul like she is about to rip it out. I stand my ground next to Christian's side as he talks to his mom and Elliot, everyone seems to be in the damn kitchen because Mia appears beside me with Kate.

"You have to let me help plan the wedding Ana!" She chirps pulling me away from my thoughts.

"Oh, I'm not even sure when that will be exactly." I smile at her, trying to ignore the burning glare to my right. Kate's eyes shoot to Elena and back.

"I say the sooner the better." Kate beams.

"I couldn't agree more." Christian says behind me. He wraps his hand around and pulls me to him. Mia looks at him and down at me.

"I say a fall wedding would be perfect."

"That's only a few months away." I gasp. She nods her head and her eyes are wide. "Shouldn't Kate," I direct my attention to Kate, " Shouldn't you choose first, I mean, it just wouldn't feel right since you got engaged first and you have also been together longer."

She eyes me nervously. "Well we already agreed to wait till next spring so fall is all yours. "My heart is pounding out of my chest, I am overwhelmed, everyone's eyes are glaring at me, and I can only imagine what Christian's face looks like right now.

"I uh," I put my finger up and wiggle out of Christian's hold, "I just need a minute." I walk out of the kitchen faster that a cheetah chasing its prey, I run my hand thought my hair, my chest feels like is caving in and I can barley breath. I dart for the stairs to Christian's room. After almost running out of breath I make it and slam the door and lock it. I throw my self onto the bed and just try to calm my breathing. I can't do this. I can't be in this house with Christian talking about marriage with this vile woman here. I can't, and that he expect me to just... ignore her? A woman he was once fucking and for fucks sake, taught him to dance. I jump off the bed and dig through my bag for my iPad, I pull it out and video call my mom. I need to talk to her.

Ping. Ping. Ping. It rings. Suddenly her face, which is much to close to the camera, appears.

"Mom, mom. Back up."

"Oh Ana Banana! I have been trying to get ahold of you." She says after she finally sits down and I can see her clearly. We started video chatting throughout the year, I refused to go see her. I was so depressed and I didn't want to show it. It was easy to hide behind a screen. It's only faking a smile for a few minutes, though sometimes she could tell I'm hurting.

"Hi mom. Iv missed you."

"Oh Ana. Iv missed you to sweetheart. Oh honey, don't cry." I didn't even realize I was crying till just now.

"I have a lot to tell you mom." I wipe my cheeks.

"What's wrong sweetie?"

"I have started dating again." Her eyes widen out of her head.

"Thats great!"

"Christian."

"Oh." She mouths. "How did this start again? Are you sure... I mean a few weeks ago you said he was probably off with another girl and to drop it."

"Well I went to a gala with Kate and all the Grey's where there. I ran into Christian and boom. We clicked." She sighs.

"Well honey, just make sure you take it slow. Don't let your guard down. I don't want to see you hurt again. Is he ready for commitment now? Are you really sure? Where are you?" She rambles off all these questions.

"I'm in Aspen with Christian, Kate, Elliot, and Grace. In a house, Christian happens to own. I would love to bring you here someday." I leave out Elena because I just can't even say her name.

"That's nice your with Kate again." She smiles and nods.

"I need to tell you something mom. Something unexpected but exciting."

"Oh my god, you are pregnant!" She starts crying.

"No no mom. Not that. For gods sake, no." She sniffles and wipes her nose.

"What then?"

"Christian asked me to marry him." I say, it's so quiet you could her a pin drop. "Mom. Mom!" She unfreezes her face.

"Honey, that seems so fast."

"I know I wasn't expecting it." I sigh to her and then the tears start flowing. "I miss you mom. Can I come see you next weekend?" I cover my eyes I'm crying so hard. I really miss my mom.

"Yes! Oh yes! Of course. Next weekend honey we will talk." I uncover my eyes and I know I'm unattractively blotchy and my nose all red.

"Okay." Just then the door to the room clicks open and Christian walks in. He shuts the door behind him quietly after eyeing what I'm doing. I forgot he had keys. "I have to go. Love you."

"Love you too honey."

Click.

I look over and he's standing there...perfect toddled hair and nickel colored eyes. "You ran off." He walks over to me and stands me up off the floor where I was sitting, he throws the iPad on the nearby chain.

"I just felt claustrophobic, I didn't even tell my mom yet. Well I just did. But I don't want to talk about planning a wedding or anything right now. I'm so uncomfortable Christian. This would of been a perfect weekend if she didn't come. We could of celebrated this with most of the people we love but now..." I clench my stomach, "This makes me sick. Sleeping under the same roof and a woman you use to fuck Christian." He doesn't say anything. He just holds me at arms length, rubbing circles with his thumb on my left shoulder.

"We can't leave, it's to dangerous. Their is a storm on the horizon coming right over us that won't pass till tomorrow morning. Would you want me to send Taylor out in this and possibly get hurt taking her to a plane that can't take off. I don't know what to do Anastasia. Do you want to stay in here? We can do that. I don't mind." He pulls me closer and kisses my forehead.

"No." I breath out. He leans back and looks at me. "I want to spend time with your family but she is right there. Staring holes into my skull. You took something away from her because of me. How do you not see her trying to get revenge for that Christian?"

"I would never let her hurt you Ana." His eyes serious and reassuring.

"I know Christian." I put my hand on his chest. "But your not always there."

"Your going to be my wife Ana. Do you think I will allow anything to happen to you? do you think Taylor or Sawyer would let anything happen to you?" I shrug knowing he's right.

"I guess not." I burry my head into his chest to avoid looking into his beautiful eyes any longer. He wraps his arms around me.

"I meant what I said." I pull away.

"I know you won't let..."

"No..." He interrupts me. "I mean yes, but no... What I said downstairs. The sooner the better Ana. I want to claim you mine in every way possible. I also want to take you in my playroom." He runs his finger down my cheek and then wraps around my neck.

"You can take me now." I say, breathless at the pure perfection of his face, how this man wants to marry me and the thought of his playroom send my mind in a whirlwind of what will happen once I let him take me in there.

"No. Not till your my wife. I need that Ana, I need that commitment to know that you won't..." He closes his eyes tight and then opens them again. "The next time we go in there we will be tied together every way humanly possible. Mind, body, soul, union. I want that for us, so much." The last part he breaths out and then his soft lips are on mine, his other hand on my back pulling my to him. My hands wrap to his shoulders.

He pulls away and places his forehead against mine. My breathing heavy, shuddering.

"Anastasia Grey." He hums it.

"It does have a nice ring to it. So I know their will be a prenup,"... Instantly he pulls away and narrows his eyes at me. "I just want you to know that I bring some debt to this relationship and I don't want it a burden on you and I also know that people assume I'm with you for the money so you have to cover your tracks. That's fine, I'll sign whatever you want. I'll even make sure to read it first."

"I would never make you sigh a prenup Ana." I cock my head to the side confused.

"But I want to. I don't want your money Christian... if something you know... happens."

"Enough of this conversation. Your debt is gone and has been gone."

My mouth falls open, "You.."

"I told you I would take care of you in every way possible. You are MINE." He growls. "No stress. Only my happy, carefree Ana. My Ana. Beautiful Ana." He runs his nose down the bride of mine.

"I'm not stress free right now with the she devil rapist downstairs." I frown. He runs his hands through my hair and caresses my face. "I'm kinda new to this relationship thing still but I don't think ex-whatever she is should be sleeping under the same roof as your fiancé. I already admitted more of my feelings about her to you than I wanted, she scare me Christian. A lot." He wipes a stray tear off my cheeks.

"Okay my sweet girl, I will fix this situation." He kisses my nose.

"How?"

"I am not sure. Stay here. I will send Kate up to you."

"But I thought no one was allowed in here but you... and..." I sniffle loudly. "... and me."

"I will make an exception this once. For you." He kisses my lips, softly. When he pulls away. I sniffle again. "Your lips are so soft when you cry, though I hate you are crying." He sighs and let's go of me but I instantly want to wrap my arms around him He runs his hand through his hair and walks out of the room.

* * *

"Ana, this room is... Wow." She looks around.

"Yeah, it is pretty something. He proposed in here. Right there." I point to the spot on the floor near the fireplace. I look down at my ring. It's bigger than Kate's and that makes me slightly self conscious, considering my hands are even smaller than hers. I hide them under the blanket as we sit on the bed together.

"So romantic." She gleams. "So why did you run out of the kitchen? Is it because of Elena or the wedding talk?"

"Both." I say hesitantly. "I also has not, until ten minutes ago, even told my mom we are back together. Im just overwhelmed."

"Oh, was she happy for you?"

"Shes... ummm.. worried we are moving to fast. I am going to go visit her next weekend and talk to her face to face."

"Awe, I am sure she will love seeing you." She tilts her head at me. "I think you should have a fall wedding. I know your not having second thoughts about marring him." My eyes dart away from the fire to her eyes.

"No. Not at all. No second thoughts."

"Then what is it?"

"I just... so sudden."

"I have a confession to make." Her face relaxes to a frown.

"Okay?" I sit up more attentive to let her know I'm paying all attention to her.

"Over the past year," she pressed her lips together and thinks for a second, "Every time over the past year that Elliot would see Christian he would ask about you. Your health... he worried so deadly sick about you Ana but made it very clear it was not suppose to get back to you that he asked. He also asked if you were seeing anyone. I think he is ready to just marry you now that he finally has you back. He never let you go but you clearly told me you were done, you never hinted to me you wanted him back. Finally I had enough and figured, if he didn't approach you... even after I said not to interfere... I knew he wouldn't be able to resist you. Specially in that dress. Anyways," my mouth is hanging open, my eyes wide at her, "I knew he wouldn't stay away if he just SAW you at the gala. You two needed to talk it out. I knew you still loved him even though you wouldn't admit it. It was either going to be closure for Christian and closure for you, or you two would work it out. It was the perfect setup."

"Kate..."

"Ana, I know your mad."

"No, it's all my fault. I should of talked to you about it. Instead of just avoiding it all around, avoiding you with Elliot and avoiding telling you how I really felt. I'm just... wow... shocked." Tears start falling down her face. "I love you Kate. Thank you." Now I'm crying.

"Will you be my maid of honor?" She asks. I wipe some tears from my cheek and throw my arms around her.

"Only if you are mine." I laugh.

"Of course. I thought this was unspoken but I wanted to ask anyways." I pull away and look at her and smirk.

"I did think about asking Elena, just for shits and giggles." I say and Kate laughs so hard we fall back on the bed. After a few minutes I roll onto my side and so does she. I prob my head on my arm. "Kate?"

"Hmm?" Her eyes are drooping, this bed will do that to you.

"What should I do about her? She is pure evil. What if she says something to Christian or pushes me down some stairs. I honestly don't know." She gives me a sleepy smile and reaches across and runs her fingers through my hair.

"She will eventually catch on that you are not going anywhere." Her eyes are closed.

"You can't tell Elliot anything. Christian would kill me. He doesn't even know I told you." I feel my eyelids becoming heavy.

"Mm." She says and before it we both pass out.

* * *

I wake to the soft touch of lips to my temple. I groan.

"Ana." He whispers in my ear. His nose runs along my jaw. "Lunch is ready." My eyes flicker open.

"What time is it?" I roll onto my back and he crawls onto the bed over me. His hands on either side of my head, flat on the bed.

"Almost one, you have been sleeping for almost 3 hours." When I am stressed or upset the way my body copes with that is by sleeping.

"I'm sorry." I move to get up but he places his hand on my collarbone holding me down.

"I tried everything I can to get her out of here but there is no pilot willing to fly in this. Believe me... I tried." I turn and look out the window and he's right, outside is completely white. I can't even see anything it is snowing so hard. I take a deep breath and look back up at his somber eyes.

"What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to come downstairs. My mother is asking for you and Kate who woke up and hour ago. I was surprised to find you to sleeping after I came back up half hour later."

"You want me to face her?" I close my eyes. He strokes my face and leans in brushing soft kisses on my neck. "This is crazy Christian." A need starts to emerge from inside. I press my thighs tighter. He stops so I open my eyes and look up at him.

"I would never ask you to do anything I didn't think you were comfortable with." He pauses and makes a face of disgust almost. His eyes look away from mine for a second but he looks back at me. "But I don't know what to do right now."

"I'll go downstairs Christian but I am not leaving your side, at all. Not even to pee. You will have to come with me." He smirks at me.

"Deal." He runs his hand down my neck, over my breast, and down my side. His touch ignites me, even though my clothes I feel his heat. His warmth. My body craves it. My breath hitches and he stops. "The things I want to do to you right now."

"Then do it." I tempt him. He cocks his head to the side and his demeanor changes.

"Okay." He flips me over onto my stomach with ease. I let out a big giggle. "You want rough?" He slaps my ass. I Yelp. "Quiet." He says. I press my lips together. "This is going to be quick. They are expecting us for lunch. Mmmm," He runs his hands down both sides of my ribs. I try not to moan at his touch. He lift up my sweater to expose my back. He tucks his thumbs into either side of my jeans and underwear. He shimmies them down my legs to about halfway down my thighs and stops.

"On your knees." I do as he says and lift my ass in the air and get on my knees. My heart is pounding. Dominant sexy Christian side ignites the deep need for something I didn't know I needed...

I hear the unzip of his pants and with a quick motion he is inside me. I let out a large gasp and so does he. But he pulls out just enough to ram back into me. It's almost painful but the pleasure is pouring through my veins. He's quick, waisting no time, thrusting his hips into me. His hands grip my sides and hold me still. He slowly down a little and I hear a groan escape him. He he thrusts a few more and I feel my own self quickening for a release. I don't hold back and let it come. My hand clenching a nearby pillow tight. He quickens and within a few thrusts he's pouring himself inside me. He kisses down my back and then pulls out. I collapse on the bed and get a good look at his just fucked face. Relaxed and smiling. I wiggle my jeans up and he slides me off the bed. He puts a few of my messed up hairs back in place.

"Mm, now we are late." He leans down and gives me a swift kiss. He takes my hand and we head downstairs. My heart pounding.

* * *

At the dinning table I find everyone sitting down. The head chair and the chair next to it empty. Next to the empty chair is seated Kate and then Elliot. Across from Elliot is Elena. Next to Elena is Grace, followed by Mia. The other head chair empty. I take a deep breath and sit down next to Kate. Christian sits at his throne. This is so awkward. I want to get up and run but my legs are jello.

"Ana, you must go swimming with me later. Kate and Elliot are. The pool is just to die for here." Mia starts.

"Sure Mia," I give her a friendly smile. I have to force myself not to look at Elena though I can tell she is staring. "That sounds great. Will you come swimming with us Christian?" I turn and look at him. He smirks.

"Of course." I take a small bite of the chicken in front of me. Chewing and looking down at my plate.

"Don't forget who the better swimmer is Christian." Elliot booms.

"Not in a million lifetimes there Elliot. I beat you that summer." He chuckles.

"That was a great race, and if I remember clearly Elliot. Christian did win." Grace says.

"Hey now... I may be small but I am fast. I was not far behind." Mia pipes.

"That was a wonderful afternoon, huh Elena?" Grace says. I loose all my appetite right there. I stop chewing and set my fork down. Not daring to look up at Christian.

"Oh yes Grace, we had many fun summers together. You, Carrick, Elliot, Mia, and, Christian." She purrs his name. Oh help me God. This woman...

I peak up through my eyelashes at her, she's giving me a wicked smile and then takes a sip of her wine. I hesitantly look at Christian, he is leaning back in his chair, hand rubbing his chin, his eyes set hard on Elena. Narrow and angry. He looks at me and down at my food. Then looks at me again. He then looks at my food quick and back at me to tell me to eat. I shake my head.

"Ana." He mouths. I pick up a small piece of chicken and eat it.

"So Ana, tell me, are you enjoying Aspen? We love it here." Grace asks me. I quickly finish chewing, giving her a polite smile. I swallow.

"Oh yes. This place is so lovely. I hope to come back often." I smile at her.

"With a room like Christian's who wouldn't want to come back." Kate smiles at me. I chuckle.

"Did you see the bathroom?" I ask her quietly. Her eyes widen.

"No?"

"That's the best part." I say, Christian reaches and grabs my hand, rubbing my knuckles softly. I give him a warm smile.

"I bet the sex in that bed is amazing." She giggles.

"Kate..." I blush. "It is." I whisper in her ear.

Mia chirps in, "Elena, I heard you had an investor in your new business your starting. I'm sorry about you having to close your salons." I shoot a look at Christian. He just nods at me that it's okay.

"Why yes, matter of fact I do. He's a nice man, works for a small company and wanted to invest his money in something... profitable." She glares at Christian. I swear he laughs under his breath. His shoulder move up and down quickly for a second.

"That's great. Do we know him?" Mia asks. My heart starts pounding and I take a sip of my wine.

"His name is Jake Hyde." She snips. I choke on my wine. Kate taps my back and Christian stands from the table. His eyes narrow at Elena.

"Seriously?" He says coldly. He places both hands flat on the table and leans in. His demeanor cold and ridged. Grace looks startled.

"What's wrong dear? Do you know him?" Grace asks.

"Yeah, he's Anastasia's old boss. He is a real piece of work." He doesn't look away from Elena till now. He looks at poor Grace. "I broke his nose."

"Oh, well honey. I'm sure Elena didn't know that."

"Yeah right, Elena is the reason Ana got fired from SIP." Kate blurts out. She is just as startled as I am. I look at her with a 'why would you say that face' but I didn't think that information was private.

"Wait what?" Elliot looks at Kate and then Elena.

"Why are you here Elena?" Christian growls.

"Wait a minute here." Grace stands up. "This weekend was to get together as a family."

"She isn't family." Christian says through his teeth.

"How can you say that Christian." Mia says from across from me. Her eyes lock with mine then looks back at her brother.

Elena finishes her glass of wine and stands up to looks at Grace. "How do you not see that this girl is with Christian for the money."

Grace looks at me and then to Elena. "There is no way that's true. Ana and Christian are in love. Don't you see all these positive changes in Christian."

"For the worst." Elena says.

"Wait wait wait..." Elliot stands up, "Ana is not with Christian for his money. I would know if a chick was into someone for money. Iv seen that so many times."

"There is no way this little girl knows what love is. Christian your confused." She says looking at him.

"He loves me. You have no idea how much he loves me and I love him more than you would ever know." I say to her. He slams his fist on the table so hard I push my chair back and jump.

"You wouldn't know what love is if it bite you on the ass Elena." He growls. His dominant side is starting to crack through. His body cold and his voice with no soul behind it. He stands up strait, more erect, towering over everyone. Placing his fist behind his back and taking a deep breath. "Can everyone leave the room please except Elena."

"Not till I know what's going on." Grace demands.

"Ana." Kate says and grabs me by the elbow.

"Christian I came here to convince you to leave her." She says, she puts her hands out. "But here I find you engaged!"

"Why would you do such a thing?" Grace gasps.

"Mother, can you leave us please."

"She isn't even a good fuck Christian." Elena says and this pushes Christian over the edge.

"Anastasia is twice the woman you ever were."

"She cant find fill your needs. Your making a mistake."

"You slept with her Christian?" Mia gasps.

"Holy fuck." I hear Elliot say. and watch his gaze fall to Christian, shocked.

"That's why." Kate says next to me.

"When I was much younger and foolish mother." Christian looks at his shocked mother and narrows his eyes at Elena.

"I love him Grace, I gave him the life he has now. I did this for him and he's going to throw it all away for this... child." She points to me.

"You did nothing for me but fuck me Elena!" Christian yells so loud I take a step back. Mia jumps even.

"Son." Grace looks at him with teary eyes and then turns back to Elena. It was an instant crack when Grace's fist met Elena's face. I cringed at the sound. Mia grabs her mother but Grace wiggles free and pushes Elena to the floor. By then Christian is at her side.

"Mother, hurting her won't change what happened." He puts his hands up, paying no attention to startled Elena on the floor. She knows damn well that now her relationship with the Grey's is permanently over.

"How old were you Christian," She covers her mouth crying.

He lowers his head, "15."

"15!" She yells. She then kicks Elena on the floor right in the ribs.

"Taylor." Christian shouts.

"Christian I am so sorry I didn't see it. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from her." She throws her arms around Christian. I don't even notice Mia till Elliot moves. Mia is walking behind Christian strait for Elena with a look of pure anger. She is about to swing and kick Elena when Elliot grabs her from behind.

"Don't." He says soothingly to his sister.

Taylor comes barging in accessing the situation. He must know exactly what happened.

"Im so sorry." Grace keeps mumbling into his chest.

"Taylor, take Elena up to the guest room. Make sure she DOESN'T leave till the jet takes her home tomorrow. My family will be coming back with me." Taylor grabs Elena's arms and pulls her off the floor hard. Mia gets out of Elliots hold just in time to punch Elena right in the nose. Blood instantly starts flowing. I cover my mouth to muffle my gasp.

"Maybe we should leave, this seems like a person thing." Kate whispers in my ear.

"Good hit." Elliot says and wraps his arms around her to secure her from doing it again.

"If your father was here." She shakes her head. "Elena. You have tormented this innocent girl by coming here." Grace's eyes shoot to me and then back to Elena." I knew you were a whore but to do this... You took advantage of my son when he was a child. A child! If I ever see you again I will... I will..." She starts balling. Taylor pulls her out of the room.

"Christian." Mia looks at him with worried eyes.

"We will talk about this more when we get home, with your father." Grace sniffles loudly. "Till then, I will be in my room. My poor son, oh my sweet boy, I love you." She leans up and kisses his cheek. Grace walks off with Mia next to her. She quickly glances over to her brother, but he doesn't notice. I do though. Elliot walks over to Christian and whispers something in his ear and walks over to Kate.

"Let's go baby." He says somberly. Kate kisses my cheek.

"We will talk. I think it's best we go to Elliot's room right now. I think he needs you right now." I just nod again.

In the room stands me and Christian. Alone.

"I'm sorry." I whisper. Christian walks over the me.

"This is all my fault." He says, placing both hands on the side of my face and making me look at him. "She ruined a perfect weekend."

"You didn't know she was coming Christian. It is not your fault." He lowers his eyes and then back at me. "I'm worried about your mother and Mia."

"Me too." He whispers. "The storm will diminish around four am. We will all leave on my jet as soon as Taylor gives us the okay." He kisses my forehead with a long lingering kiss.

"Will you play me a song on the piano?" I am trying to distract him, knowing how beautiful even his sad songs sound against the notes. He sighs and looks down at me.

"Right now?"

"Yes." I breath.

"Only for you." He gives me a quick kiss and then takes my hand.


	20. Chapter 20

**I am sorry this took awhile to upload.**

 **I had to dedicate the story to a certain path and stick to it**

 **I am looking into getting a beta. If anyone is interested you can private message me**

 **and we can discuss it.**

 **I understand my spelling and grammar is not up to par,**

 **so I am willing to accept help and go back and fix errors to make my**

 **story as great as I feel it can be.**

 **Thank you again for the reviews and being so patient!**

* * *

A few hours have passed and no one has come down. I am starting to think they will not for the rest of the time here.

"What do we do now?" I ask him. We are standing in the living room in front of the fireplace. He has his hands in my hair and he is just gazing down at me. He presses his lips together for a second.

"I don't know."

"Shouldn't you go to talk to your mother? She is hurt Christian. Her supposed best friend took advantage of her son. Maybe if she knew everything..."

"Absolutely not Ana." He interrupts me. "She can not know about my lifestyle."

"I just think that me being with you caused all this to come out."

"Don't ever feel as though this is your fault. My mother was going to find out someday. I dreaded it." He sighs. "I'm so glad your here. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you with me. " I run my hand down his cheek to comfort him. "This whole weekend is ruined. I have to make it up to you somehow."

"Christian... last night was the best night of my life. I wouldn't want to change it in any way." I bow my head and just close my eyes. What a mess of a day though. He kisses the top of my head and pulls me close. Someone from the corner of the room clears their throat. I look up and see Elliot.

"Christian, if I had known." He starts.

"Elliot. Please." Christian lets go of me and walks towards Elliot.

"I'll just..." I motion towards another exit and make it a step.

"No Anastasia. Please, sit down." Christian says and points to the sofa. I do as he says.

"Elliot, I don't want to talk about it. It was a long time ago. No one was suppose to find out." He says.

"Was it once or more." He asks.

Christian takes a deep breath, "It went on for awhile." He gives me a sorry glance and looks back at Elliot.

"And yet you made no mention of this to anyone. Christian... 15... she's what... old. How did it happen?"

"Elliot, it was a mistake." Elliot's looks up at Christian.

"I just wish I could of been there for you man, that's all. You could have told me anything."

"Elliot, please." Christian begs. "Enough has already been said today." Elliot shakes his head and I think he's going to walk away but instead embraces Christian is a huge. He lets him go but Christian doesn't say anything. Just looks at his brother.

"Christian..." Mia says from the archway. "I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?" He says. I suddenly feel like I am intruding on a very personal family matter. My body tells me to get up and leave but I fight it, staying put.

"For not being there for you. For making you feel you couldn't come talk to me."

"Mia. I don't talk to anyone. I didn't do it because of any of you. Please believe me." He says. "I don't want this to effect our family."

"What are you going to do about Elena?"

"What do you mean? Obviously as soon as the skies clear send her ass home. You two and mom will accompany Ana and I on my jet." He looks out the window and walks toward it. Turning his face so I can't see it, but I want to see what he's feeling right now.

"Mom is just hurt you didn't tell her but also hurt Elena took advantage of you, you were a child Christian."

"Fifteen is hardly a child." He growls.

"Was she your first?" Mia ask. Christian body tenses and I see his head slowly turn toward her.

"Don't ask such ridicules questions Mia." He says though his teeth. Mia looks at me eyes wide like asking me what she should do. I pat the spot next to me and she slowly marches over. Sinking down next to me I take her hand into mine and smile at her. She leans her head on my shoulder and lets out a sigh. Christian looks at me with sad eyes and then looks to Elliot.

"I need to talk to mom." He says

"I'm right here." Suddenly Grace emerges from the other door close to the kitchen. With a brandy in her hand and puffy eyes. She has been crying, hard.

"Christian, I feel as though I have failed you as a mother." She sniffles.

"No, this had nothing to to do with you mother." He says and slowly walks to her. "It was all my choice. My doing. Please, can't we move past this?"

"My best friend was taking advantage of my adolescent son. No we can't just get passed this Christian. How did that happen? Why didn't you come talk to me?" The glass in her hand starts shaking, Christian takes it from her and he sets it on a nearby table and pulls her into his arms. "Oh son. I am so sorry. I need to make things right." She says into his chest. He pulls her away to arms length.

"It was nothing like that, but you don't need to do anything. Okay? What's done is done and now that you know. She can be out of all of our lives. Especially Ana's and mine." He looks at me and smiles. I give him a small smile back but I feel so awkward being down here in the middle of something so personal.

"When I tell her husband about this..." Grace says as she wiggles her finger.

"If the public gets knowledge of this mother..." Christian breaths and her eyes widen. "Do you think Link wouldn't go leak this to every tabloid possible to blast me. I can't have that. It was so long ago mother. I have moved passed it. I have moved on and have a good life. Okay? You are not a bad mom. The best in the world. I was just to messed up to realize it back then." He shakes his head.

"We need to tell your father. Together." She says.

"We will as soon as we get back. Whatever makes you happy. But mother, this can't go public. Please." I see for the first time Christian's grip on everything around him slowly slip away and I feel sorry for him. I also feel relieved, Grace had the right to know and Elena... who knows what will happen to her now. My mind registers back to her working with Hyde. Two people who absolutely despise me right now. I get up and walk out of the room. Ignoring all the glances from everyone at my sudden exit. I dash for the kitchen to find some wine.

I find myself staring into the open kitchen door. Looking at the same stuff over and over hoping something pops out. Nothing does so I shut the door and turn to the counter resting my hands on it and I take a few deep breaths. Sometimes being with Christian can be, overwhelming.

"Hey." His voice says from the doorway. I slowly l look up at him.

"Hi," I stand strait up. He's leaning against the frame, arms crossed and one foot over the other. How does he make a simple thing look so hot. I loose train of thought for a second.

"Are you looking for something?" He says. That makes me wonder how long he has been standing there.

"Wine." I smirk at him.

"It wouldn't be in that fridge." He smirks at me and eases himself off the doorframe and walks over to a small pull out drawer, he opens it and a light appears and he pulls out a chilled bottle of white wine. How was I suppose to find that in all the cupboards in here.

"Hidden chiller, right." I chuckle. He smiles at me and pulls out a wine glass from the cupboard. He pours me a glass and hands it to me. It goes down so smoothly that I finish the whole glass. I set it down on the counter next to the bottle of wine.

"Are you trying to get drunk Miss. Steele?"

"Maybe." I smirk.

"This is all a mess." He runs his hand through his hair. He grabs me and pulls me to him. "I just want to bury myself in you till we can go home." He whispers in my ear. My whole body gets the goosebumps.

"I think your mother needs you." I say back.

"I need you." His voice is almost pleading. He lowers his head and starts kissing my neck. I let out a small moan but my stomach growling interrupts the moment. He pulls away and looks down at me.

"Sit down, I will make you something." He says sternly. I don't feel hungry right now though. My stomach growls again. Okay, maybe I am. I walk over and sit at the end of the island. I bring the wine with me and pour myself another glass. Watching Christian make me a sandwich is actually really hot. I twist the glass in front of me on the marble countertop.

"I umm... made plans to see my mom next weekend."

"Oh?" He says.

"Yeah, I want to see her." I look down. "I haven't seen her since we broke up." I say quietly. Hoping he doesn't even hear me.

"Why?" He stops what he is doing and walks over to me, twisting around the chair on the stool so I am facing him.

"Because I was really sad and I didn't want her to see me like that." He sighs and presses his lips together.

"I'm sorry Anastasia. I should have never let you go." He lets go of me and walks back to making the sandwich, his face emotionless. I wish I could read his mind to see what he is thinking. When he sets the plate down in front of me I have already finished my second full glass of wine and I feel it warming my body. "Do you want to go alone?" He asks just as I take a bite of the turkey sandwich. I finish chewing and look at him.

"No. I would like you to come with me. She is going to have questions for you, no doubt." I sarcastically roll my eyes. He chuckles.

"Eat." He points to the food and I gladly eat. As I do he walks around the kitchen, pacing and rubbing his chin. I finish the last bite and clear my plate. After I set it in the sink he spins me around to look at him and takes my face in his hands. "You are the most important person in my life." I instantly smile as he runs his finger under my cheek. He is studying my face with his eyes.

"And you mine." I close my eyes and lean into his one hand. Slowly I open my eyes back up and look up at him. His eyes still looking down at me.

"Let's make it through tonight so we can get back home already." He places his forehead against mine.

"That sounds like a plan."

* * *

Yawning, eyes half open, and barley able to keep up right. It's 4:15am and we are getting ready to leave Aspen. Part of me will miss it here but part of me can't wait to get the hell away. Away from Elena and away from the awkwardness I feel around everyone right now. I set my last bag down by the front door. Mia following behind me, putting her MK luggage down next to mine.

"I love it out here but I need warmth in my life." She giggles next to me. I look over o her and give her a half sleepy smile.

"Me too." I yawn again. Christian wraps his arms around me from behind and kisses the top of my head. He lets me go all to quickly. I spin around and look up at him. I still find myself catching my breath when I look into his eyes.

"You can sleep on the plane." He says and touches my cheek as I yawn again. I maybe got a total of three hours of sleep last night. The family stayed gathered around the fireplace reminiscing about old times till after midnight. Grace cried, a lot. I feel awful she found out in the way she did but I think it was for the best. I stayed for Christian. He held my hand tight all night, giving me a reassuring squeeze every time his mom would bring up Elena. It made me sick to my stomach but I did best to not let it show.

"I feel like I could sleep for days right now." I smile at him. Then it dawns on me I forgot my phone on the nightstand next to me bed. I sigh heavy. "Umm, can I have the key to upstairs. I forgot my phone." He chuckles a little and pulls his keys out of his pocket. I don't know why I think it's so hot when he does such subtle things. He hands them to me, giving me a swift kiss.

"Be quick." He grabs my bag from the floor and heads out the door. I waltz past everyone putting their coats on and skip up the stairs. I reach his room rather quickly and out of breath. I go inside to retrieve my phone and take one last look around the room. Quickly I head back downstairs, all to anxious to leave and be back to Escala and the warmth. As I reach the landing before the stairs leading to the first floor, I hear a voice. Loud, obnoxious, and familiar. I peak down the stairs to make sure no one is coming up and the I walk to the voice. Three doors down on the left Elena's voice thunders loudly through the door. I stand outside and listen to the conversation.

"You think I planned for this to happen... They are engaged now... I don't know how Mia found out... They have connections... I think it's time to get rid of her... For both our satisfaction but it will be harder now that Grace won't allow me to be around... No, leave him to me... I miss you too Jack... We will get back together when I'm back..."

"Ana?" I jump, grabbing my chest over my heart. I spin around to see Kate.

"You scared me." I whisper. She tilts her head at me. "I was looking for a...the...bathroom." I shake my head to clear my thoughts. She points to a door down the hall.

"Two down on the left." She smiles at me though she looks confused.

"Thanks." I speed walk to the bathroom, splashing water in my face. What did I just hear? I take a few deep breaths. I need to tell Christian as soon as we are back. I whip open the door and head for downstairs. Looking at Elena's door as I pass it. I almost stumble down the stairs I walk so fast, I need to get away from her. Here. I literally smash into Christian's chest because I don't slow down in time. He grabs me by the shoulders and holds me upright.

"Woah, are you alright?"

"Yeah. Yeah. I just um..." I clear my throat, "I just picked up to much momentum going down the stairs." He raises his eyebrow at me in the glorious way he does when I confuse him.

"Go slower next time." He says sternly. I chuckle at him. He runs his hand through my hair and then turns to grab my jacket off the hook. He helps me into it, making sure all my buttons are done tight. Sometime she makes me feel like a child but I know it's his way of making sure I'm safe, in this case warm. I adore his little gestures though. It's a side of him no one else sees. After I pull my hat down and put my gloves on he gives me a kiss on the nose.

* * *

 _Rain. Rain. It's dark. Everywhere is dark and dripping with water. I realize I am in an ally as sounds of city come from the light. I look down and I'm in white. White dress. White vail draped over my shoulders. White shoes. Dirty shoes. Bang. I run towards the foggy light and sounds away from the loud crack. Feet splashing in puddles. Bang. I run faster. Bang. I fall onto the concrete ground. I can't get up. I roll onto my back and look up. A woman in red. Red coat. Red lipstick. Red umbrella. Black gun pointed at my chest. Elena. Bang. Blackness._

I wake in a sweat, sitting strait up with the feeling of panic washed over me. I grab the pillow next to me and burry my face into sobbing so no one on the plane can hear me.

* * *

 **next chapter coming soon..**.


	21. Chapter 21

**Hi Everyone, sorry for the delayed chapter, a lot can explain that.**  
 **Life being the big one.**  
 **Thank you for being patient and kind.**

 **I also received a few emails about being my beta and I am**  
 **happy to say I found one and she is super sweet.**  
 **Thank you for all the PM's though.**  
 **Together we will be going back and redoing the chapters grammar and small**  
 **mistakes to make the story as great as it can be.**

 **Thank you all!**  
 **I can't believe I am almost to 1000 followers!  
I am in awe of what a great crowd of people I have attracted to this story!**

 **(A &C Song)**

 **"Wildest Dreams"- Taylor Swift**

* * *

I walk through the doors of Escala after a long day of flying and being in the car and my stomach quietly growls. I take a deep breath. Finally, home. I set my purse down on the counter and walk around the living room, taking in the view. As much as I enjoyed our trip, I am happy to be home with Christian, back to some normalcy after the weekend we have had. I cross my arms and close my eyes in front of the tall window.

"You have been very quiet since we left the house in Aspen," he comments as soon as Taylor clears the room. "Is there something you want to talk about?" I spin around to look at him.

"I wanted to wait till we were alone. I didn't want to upset your mother even more than she already is." By the time I finish my sentence, he has closed the gap between us.

"What?" His eyes are narrow.

"I overheard Elena on the phone through her door right before we left. She was talking to Jack Hyde, I am sure of it. She said something about making me disappear and how it will be harder to do now that Grace knows about you two. Christian, do you think she would really physically harm me?" He closes his eyes, runs his hand through his hair, and takes a deep breath.

"I am not sure what she is capable of anymore. Tell me what else she said."

"Just that she missed him and they were going to see each other when she got back."

"I am not going to let anything happen to you." He pulls me to him and squeezes me tightly for a second and let's me go. "I have to make a few phone calls." He kisses my forehead, takes a deep breath, and walks away swiftly, leaving me in the vast living room alone. I hear him call for Taylor and then it's quiet. I wait for five minutes for him to reemerge from his office but when he doesn't, I decide to go take a hot shower. In the shower, I can't stop thinking about that dream. So crazy real and scary. I wrap my arms around myself, enjoying the warmth of the water falling down my back. I try to clear my thoughts but her face is just imprinted in my mind. I quickly wash my hair and body but then take my time drying with the huge, soft white towel. They smell so good that I could almost stay wrapped up in this all day. Could I ever get used to this life of luxury? I'm used to cheap, Walmart towels - not these. I go into the closet and dress in a cute summer dress with matching flats. Even though it's nighttime, I am not ready for pajamas. When I reenter the living room, Christian is waiting for me with two glasses and a bottle of wine. Instantly, this makes me smile.

"We need to talk," he says. My heart stops and the blood drains from my face.

"Oh," I whisper.

"Come sit down." He sits down on the sofa, setting the glasses and wine on the table in front of him. He watches me walk over and sit down next to him. His eyes skim up and down my legs. Placing his hand on my leg he slowly travels up till his finger skims my panty line. He slides his hand back down and drapes it over the back of the couch. He clears his throat and takes his reluctant eyes away from my bare legs. He looks me in the eye and takes a deep breath. "No one has seen Jack in four days," he sighs loudly. "If Elena said they would meet up, then I will send my best men to some places I know she frequently goes to meet up with her subs, not that I think Jack is the subbing type." He makes a disgusted face and leans forward to pour a glass of wine.

"Are you going?" I ask and take the glass from him, my heart racing. He looks at me and scans my eyes.

"Once my men find her I will."

"You are going to confront her alone?" I gasp.

"No, Anastasia." He makes a stern face. "I will have Taylor with me. Till then he is to stay here with us." He smiles and touches my cheek as he leans back and takes a gulp of his wine. "You are to remain here at all times."

"But I am going to my mom's this weekend. I am not cancelling that, Christian." He sets his glass down on the table and presses his lips together as he leans back. He rubs his chin for a moment and then our eyes lock.

"I need you to reschedule, Anastasia. Your safety is my number one priority and you are the safest here."

"That's not fair, Christian."

"That's not fair?" he huffs, "Me not being able to live my life with you without this bullshit is not fair. Reschedule," his voice is stern. I lower my eyes and set my glass down. "I'm sorry, Anastasia. It is too risky to be out and about right now till I figure all this out. Your safety is my number one priority since it is because of me that you could be in serious danger." I slowly raise my eyes to his and they are soft; his face is relaxed and he looks sad. I reach up and stroke his cheek. He reaches and puts his hand over mind, closing his eyes and leaning into my palm. I don't really feel like things with Elena are going to get better anytime soon; she seems to have our lives tangled around her little finger. I put my glass on the table and stand up. I walk over to the window and sigh. When I turn around, he is still sitting on the couch. He is handsome as hell, batting his dreamy lashes at me.

"I'm sorry," I say, crossing my arms and taking a deep breath. He stands up and walks over to me.

"None of this is your fault. If anything, I am to blame. I am going to fix this." I look away from him and turn back to the window to look out over the skyline of the city.

"I just..." His hand wraps around my shoulder and turns me to him.

"You can't blame yourself." He rubs my arms and looks me over. "Why don't you go take a nap? You don't look like you slept much on the plane," he says. I can read the worry on his face.

"I didn't. I had a nightmare." I shrug and try to turn from him but his grip on my arm tightens to hold me in place.

"A nightmare?" he asks.

"About Elena." I don't look up at his face, worried about what expression he could be making. He reaches up and grabs my chin to make me look at him.

"What happened in this nightmare?" he whispers. He looks worried as hell.

"She shot me." That's all I say as I tremble thinking about it, relieved it was only a dream.

"That will never happen, Anastasia," he says, his voice stern now. "Don't think about such things."

"I didn't," I says, almost to harshly back. "I didn't start thinking about it till after the dream."

"Sir." Taylor interrupts us from the other side of the room. "There is something you should see." Christian looks back down to me after nodding to Taylor.

"Go lay down. I will join you soon and we can finish this discussion later." He rubs my arms and leans down to give me a swift kiss on the cheek. I watch him as he walks towards his office with Taylor. I'm curious of what he has to see... right now. I quietly make my way to the outside of the office and eavesdrop.

"Sir, we pulled up a recent transaction of an old coworker of Miss. Steele's; Elizabeth. Last night, she made reservations at Hotel Frink in New York for a two week stay. It's one of the hotels on your list. Seemed like a red flag, sir."

"Where is he now?"

"He has not checked in yet, Sir, and there has been no other transactions on this card in the last week. It was almost impossible to find. His car is not at his complex, either."

I hear Christian sigh. "I suppose that is where he is planning on meeting Elena. Watch him and wait for him to make a move. I need eyes there at all times. As soon..."

I quickly tiptoe to our room. Pacing and sick to my stomach, I think about Elena and Jack together and now Liz. All of them conspiring to get rid of me because I fell in love with Christian. Tears swell in my eyes. I stare out the window.

In a few minutes, I hear the sound of the door opening and shutting. My heart races as I hear his footsteps behind me but I don't turn around.

"I just want you safe," He says. He's close behind me but he doesn't touch me. "It's my main concern."

I slowly turn around and look up into his soft, gray eyes.

"I'm scared," I say, wrapping my arms around myself.

"Baby." He reaches forwards and lightly tugs me into his arms to close the small gap between us. "It's okay. Nothing will happen to you." He kisses the top of my head. I close my eyes and breathe in his Christian scent, taking in how my body fits perfectly against his, his heat radiating off and warming me. I simply forget everything else when I am in his arms. After a minute, I pull away from him slowly.

"How about I make us dinner?"

"I'd much rather have you stay in here with me the rest of the night." He grins at me and leans down, his one hand reaching for the small of my back to pull me back to him. He starts kissing my neck softly, sending a tingle down my spine and into my core.

"Shouldn't I be doing those things, though? You know, since I will be your wife and all." He chuckles against my neck.

"Well, I am hungry." He kisses my neck again and stands up straight, his hands still on my back. "But you don't have to do those things for me most nights. I'd much rather have you with me doing other things rather than cooking. That's what I pay Gail for. A nice salary, I must add."

"But I like doing those thing for you," I say to him. He smirks at me.

"I know and that's one of the things I love about you. You like to take care of me. It's... comforting. I'm going to take a shower."

I smile up at him and wiggle out of his arms and walk towards the door. I stop about halfway and turn back to him.

"But after dinner..." I smile at him and start walking slowly backwards, "We can come back here and you can finish what you were about to start." I grin at him and turn and leave the room quickly, letting the electricity in the air die down for a minute before walking. Christian is intoxicating, making the very world around us melt away. When I am not around him, it takes me a minute to get back to reality and for the world around me to set in. For life to seem real again… and to remember I might be in actual danger.

 **Edited By: Dontcare89**


	22. Chapter 22

**This chapter is a little bit of everything.  
**

 **Thank you, as always, for reading!  
Let me know what you think!**

 **And thank you to my wonderful beta,  
dontcare89.  
She has been so wonderful!**

* * *

I lay in bed looking at the wall. I don't need to roll over to notice his presence isn't there. The bed is cold and lonely. Christian hasn't been in bed every morning the last 12 days that we have been back. He is so strung up on finding Elena and Jack that he hasn't emerged from his office. I turn and look at his side of the bed, wishing he was there. I reach over and grab his pillow, pulling it to me. I just lay there for a minute, taking in his scent. After a few minutes my eyes flicker up to the clock. It's only eight thirty. I finally sit up, stretch, and run my fingers through my hair. I slowly slide the duvet off and slip on my soft, cotton robe and slippers. After quickly using the bathroom, I venture off to find him.

The living room is empty but I can hear them in his study, arguing loudly but not loud enough for me make out what they are saying. I get closer to the study and freeze when I hear the tone of Christian's voice.

"I don't fucking care what you have to do!"

"But Sir..."

"No. End of it."

"My apologies. I was out of line."

"Don't let it happen again."

I hear footsteps quickly approach the door and it clicks and swings open before I can hide. Taylor freezes when he sees me. His body language is tense, his jaw tight. He nods his head to me and I watch him as he walks quickly into the foyer to a small office. When I turn my attention back to the office, Christian is standing in the doorway. He walks over to me and wraps his arm around my back, his other lightly folds into my hair.

"I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" He looks exhausted but he is trying to hide it.

"What was that all about?" I ask. He leans down and starts kissing my neck, distracting me. I instantly feel my body melt.

"Nothing you need to worry about, my love," he says against my neck. His hot breath tickles. His kisses send tingles down my spine.

"Mmkay." I roll my eyes. He stops kissing my neck and pulls away to look at me. He arches his eyebrow. Does he know I just rolled my eyes?

"Are you hungry?" he asks. I nod my head. He grabs my hand and leads me to the kitchen. I smile as soon as I see Gail cutting up vegetables at the island.

"Good morning, Gail," I say. She looks up at me and smiles.

"Good morning, Ana. What would you like for breakfast?" I am thankful she has finally learned I like to be called Ana. It makes me also feel so much more comfortable around her.

"Umm, how about french toast?" I smile at her and she quickly gets to making the best french toast I have ever had. I eat until I am so stuffed I am half tempted to crawl back into bed. I look over at Christian who finished his omelet awhile ago. He's staring out the window. His mind far from this kitchen nook. "I am so full. I can't eat another bite, even if you forced me to." He snaps out of it and looks at me. He looks down at my plate and smiles.

"You need to eat like that more often." He says.

"No promises." I chuckle and clear our plates before Gail beats me to it.

"I need to make a few calls. I'll come find you in a little bit." He stands up and starts walking away but then he stops. He turns around and looks at me.

"I love you," he says to me as he slowly walks back. "I don't tell you that enough." He reaches under my chin and plants a swift kiss on my lips.

"You show it plenty," I say. Part of me feels like that was a lie. I know he loves me but these past few weeks I have felt so distant from him.

"Mmm," he hums. I have a feeling that he knows what I am thinking. He turns and makes his way to his office.

"Thank you, Gail. I am going to go check some emails." I turn and give her a smile before leaving the kitchen. I grab the warm black blanket from the bedroom, my laptop, and make my way to the couch, that way I will see Christian as soon as he is done with his phone calls. The only thing I have to do is read through some emails from SIP's present and potential clients. I have been emailing them back about how I am no longer employed there and, honestly, I feel worse than when I started. I miss working but I don't miss working for Jack. I miss the actually job. Some of these clients had such potential that the thought of not being their editor pains me. I close my eyes and put my head in my hands. I miss Christian.

A warm hand suddenly runs over my shoulder.

"Hi," I say so quietly that it's almost a whisper. I shut my laptop and put in on the couch next to me.

"What's wrong?" He walks around the couch and sits down next to me. He slides his arm onto the back of the couch behind me. His other hand takes my left hand and grazes over my fingers. He stops for a few seconds over the delicate looking ring.

"I was emailing back some of my old clients, just telling them I don't work there anymore," I frown at him.

"In due time you will have something even better." He gives me a reassuring grin. "I can assure you."

"How can you be so sure? It's not like I can even use Jack as a reference." I regret it as soon as I say it. That wipes the grin right off his face.

"You can use me." He's serious.

"Christian Grey to the rescue," I giggle. "But I can't use you just because you are my fiancé. That doesn't mean people will just give me things." His eyes narrow. I nervously look away from his eyes and play with the blanket between my other fingers. He really is intimidating.

"You would be very surprised, Miss. Steele." He shifts his head slightly to the side. I might have just wounded his ego a little.

"Are you all done with your phone calls?" I ask, looking back up at his face.

"I..." Then he stops, his eyes scanning my face. "For now," he sighs. I take his face in between my hands and give him a long kiss.

"I love you," I say softly. He runs his hand through my hair and looks at me for a few heartbeats.

"I can't put into words how much I love you, Anastasia," he says seriously.

"You won't lose me again." I smile at him. His arms wrap around me, his warmth engulfing me. We sit like this for awhile. It has been the most comfortable I have been in a while. I pull away from him and he just looks at me with such love that I don't need him to verbalize how he feels about me. I see it and I know that he has never looked at anyone the way he looks at me. The thought alone is comforting.

"I could use a shower." I smile at him and blush. He knows exactly what I am implying. I shy away because the thought of him naked has me grinning like a little kid in a candy shop. He stands up and I think he is going to walk away but instead he scoops me into his arms. I let out a loud gasp and he chuckles. I know he can easily carry me but I still feel like I must be heavy to him. He whisks me away into the bathroom.

* * *

I am just finishing up brushing my hair after our shower when he startles me.

"You look lovely," he says from the doorway. I am dressed in a pair of white, skinny pants and a dark blue tank top. I found a pair of matching white and dark blue striped flats that have small white bows in the back.

"And yet no where to go," I pout at him.

"You know why," he says and creases his eyebrows.

"Was missing the trip to see my mom really necessary? Not being able to see my friends?" He looks shocked for a second. He then starts to walk forward. "All of this protecting because of Elena. You know she is ruining everything." I shake my head and mumble to myself quietly, "I should've never told you." I cross my arms and take a deep breath. He makes a stern face and I know I crossed some unspoken line of his. He stops a few feet from me.

"Then I really would have punished you for keeping it from me. I am already furious that you didn't tell me right away. I might have been able to avoid some of this." His eyes are dark now. "I am doing everything I can here, Anastasia."

"But you are not telling me anything." In the almost two weeks we have been here he has not shared any information about Elena with me except what I have gathered from eavesdropping. He just spends all his time in his office. "At least you have work to do to pass the time. I have nothing but sad emails. I have tried to give you your space so you can figure this out. In return I am just...doing nothing. It's boring and I don't see you. I know you are not sleeping because I go to bed and wake up alone every morning. You won't talk to me" I say to him louder than I anticipated. He takes a step forward and his eyes harden. "Why?"

"I don't need you to be anymore worried than you are."

"I can handle it."

"Really, Ana? How many time have you woken up screaming from that dream you keep having?" Six, I count in my head. Each time it feels so much more real than the last. I admit I am scared of her but not enough to hide. We shouldn't stop living our lives because of her. I look away. He paces for a few seconds and then stops to rub his chin. My anxiety kicks in and I feel sick to my stomach. I spin around and brace myself on the counter. When his hand touches my shoulder I shrug him off. Tears swell in my eyes. I turn and look at him.

"I just think she is laying low because of what happened in Aspen."

"You must know all her secret spots." I narrow my eyes at him. "There is more. I know it."

"You and your mouth today." He shakes his head.

"Maybe I wouldn't mind being trapped in here so much if I actually saw you and not just for sex. Is that how you treated your subs? Kept them around just for..."

"Enough!" He shouts with such anger that I jump. "Don't ever say that again. That is the furthest thing from the truth and you know it."

"I don't know anything anymore! Your ex-dominant is after my head for simply loving you and you are spending all this time looking for her. It's like you still belong to her."

"Ana," He gasps.

"Well, it's true."

"She needs to learn her place."

"And you intend to put her there? What are you going to say to her, Christian? What makes you think she is really going to listen to YOU?"

"I will make her!" He exclaims with confidence.

"How? Just yell at her?"

"Are you questioning my ability to handle the situation?" He looks sternly at me.

"I just want to know how you plan to stop her. I have a right to know. It's me they are after."

"Don't you think I know that?"

"Here we are living together and I have never felt so distant from you."

"You need to give me time to figure this all out."

"Just ignore it. Let's act like I never overheard some silly conversation and go back to happier times."

"You know I can't just do that."

"I knew you would say that." He reaches out to touch me but I back away. His hand drops to his side. "I need to know everything, Christian." He looks away from me and then runs his hand through his hair. "Tell me what you know," I quietly demand.

"No."

I storm past him and out of the bathroom. I make my way for the kitchen, thinking maybe a glass of wine will calm me down. Christian follows me.

"Anastasia," he says behind me as I pour my glass of wine. I take a big sip and close my eyes. I lower my head and run my free hand through my hair. After taking a few deep breaths I slowly turn to him.

"I'm going to take a nap." I drink the rest of my wine. I set the glass in the sink and walk right past Christian, not even looking at him. As I walk back to our room tears run down my cheeks. Maybe that was a little harsh but I wasn't lying. I want this Elena thing to be over.

I only wake up from my nap to eat dinner. I eat alone at the table as Christian stays in his office. I contemplate bringing him a plate of food but I need him to make the first move. He needs to tell me what's going on. As soon as my plate is clear I get up from the table and head back to the bedroom. Frustrated, I change into my pajamas and crawl under the covers. I wait for what seems like forever for him to come to me. He doesn't come. The apartment is quiet.

I fall asleep crying into my pillow.

* * *

I wake up to the sound of the elevator dinging that someone has arrived at the apartment. I sit straight up in bed. The crisp air makes goosebumps rise on my skin as it is only covered by a thin, satin nightgown.

Christian is sound asleep next to me. I wonder when he finally came to bed. I faintly pick up the echoed click of heels against the marble floor. I would recognize that sound anywhere. My heart is pounding so heavy that I can hear it beating in my ears.

I shake Christian's shoulder nervously.

"Hey," I whisper. He rolls over and props himself up on his elbow. He sleepily looks at me as he rubs his one eye with his free hand.

"Hey, about earlier... " He starts.

"I heard the elevator and someone walking. Heels," I say. He stops rubbing his eye and looks at me as if my words woke him right up. He blinks at me a few times. "Will you go look?" He runs his hand down my arm.

"Of course," He says and then rolls out of bed. My eyes catch the clock; it's just after two. He walks to the door and stops before opening it all the way. He looks over his shoulder at me. "Stay here." He leaves the room but keeps the door open. I listen from the bed, clutching the blanket to my chest.

 **edited by: dontcare89**


	23. Chapter 23

**This chapter was a struggle. It was a combination between**  
 **how fast I wanted to approach a situation and how far I wanted to take it.**  
 **I am proud of how this chapter finally came together!**

 **Did you all see the new movie? It was amazing!**

 **Thank you all for your patients and kinds reviews/messages**  
 **I take time to read everyone and although I cant respond directly to guests,**  
 **I just want to say THANK YOU THANK YOU.**  
 **Enjoy Chapter 23 and let me know what you think!**

 **Another update coming next weekend!**

 **-A 3**

 **also huge shout out to my beta dontcare89 for making this chapter perfect!**

* * *

"Elena," I hear him say. "How did you get in here?"

"Don't you remember last summer? You game me the override code in case I ever needed anything." Her voice is low but her words make my stomach turn.

"That was two years ago when your husband was beating you for sleeping with other men. I once felt sorry for you; now I feel nothing. I don't understand how you got in here at two in the morning but, for once, I'm glad you did. There are some things we need to clear up."

"I know."

"I am glad you know. I don't understand why you are out to hurt Ana. To kill her! You don't understand our love. You never will. That lifestyle you introduced me to is not what I need. I need love, affection, stability, and compassion. All the things that you lack. It is completely unacceptable from anyone to threaten the life of my fiancé. I think it's time for you to leave the country - start a life somewhere far, far away. There is nothing here for you and I will make damn sure of it!"

"Is that why you did it?" Her voice cracks as if she is crying. I can hear the light slur behind some of her words. She's drunk.

"You are not making sense." They are quiet for a moment. I strain my ears but cannot hear anything. Why are they so quiet? I feel full of fear all the sudden.I feel cold and the hair on my arms stands up. "Elena, put down the gun," I hear Christian say sternly. Gun?!

"No. This ends here, Christian." she replies. I quickly jump off the bed and grab my robe off the chair, covering my thin satin nightgown. I tie the sash tightly across myself, trying to hold myself together in the same manner. I slide next to the door and just listen, my heart pounding out of my chest. I don't know I if I should go out there or stay in here. Christian would be furious if I put myself in danger. "This is all your fault. Everything."

"Stop this insane behavior right now and give me the gun before you do something stupid." My whole body breaks out in a cold sweat and my knees weaken. Where is Taylor?

"No. I'm here for something else," her voice hisses. She must do something to indicate me because Christian growls his next words. "You would have to kill me before I let you harm her and we both know you would never do that."

"I just might."

"You belong in a mental hospital, Elena! You are not right," he yells at her.

"I am not going anywhere, darling." she says. I hear her heels clicking on the floor. I take a deep breath and I slide against the wall and peek out into the living room. There she is, standing in the great room wearing a tight black dress with high, black stilettos on. Straight out of a James Bond movie. She is pointing a small handgun directly at Christian. She is just a feet away from him yet close enough that he can probably smell the alcohol coming off her. Taking in the scene, I let out an involuntary gasp and they both look in my direction. I slide back into the room as fast as I can. My hands fly to my mouth and I squeeze my eyes shut. Stupid me.

"Ana, Ana, Ana," her voice calls for me. "Come here, Ana."

"Stay there!" Christian yells.

"I will hurt him," she yells louder. Her shrill yet sinister voice rings in my ears.

"No, Anastasia." His voice cracks. I hear the fear in his words.

BAM.

Tears instantly roll down my face. My heart plunges into my stomach and I fall to floor. I should have gone out there. Why am I still here? My hands still over my mouth, muffling my scream for Christian.

"That was a warning shot," she yells. My eyes pop open and I stand right up. I take a huge breath and slide into the doorway. My eyes lock on Christian's. I scan him from head to toe. His face reads of pain but not from any physical injury.

"Leave her out of this, Elena. This is between me and you." She motions for me to come closer to her slowly with her finger. Her eyes flicker between me and Christian. Making sure he doesn't move. His eyes don't move from me. Slowly, I start walking towards him.

"Please, Elena. There is no need for this," I plead, my voice scratchy.

"Everything was fine till you came along," she sneers through her teeth.

"You can't choose who you fall in love with," I say to her. "Just put the gun down. Don't hurt him. He did nothing wrong." My hands are visibly shaking. My whole body feels weak and vulnerable. My eyes unwillingly move from looking at her and look at Christian. His face is hard and his body tense. Studying my every move. He is only a few feet away now. How badly I want to reach out to just touch him and have him wrap his arms around me.

"He didn't tell you about Jack being dead did he?" Jack's...dead? I look straight at Christian. His face tells me he knew all along. Her eyes narrow on mine. I can't think straight. My eyes drop to the floor and I thinks about all of Christian's strange behavior and that must have been what he was trying to hide from me. Why would he hide it? I didn't even get a chance to respond when she answers for me; I guess my body language said it all. "He didn't." She takes a step forward but doesn't point the gun away from Christian. She knows I won't try anything stupid while his life is in danger like that.

"I know you are behind it, Christian. I knew you had something to do with it the second I heard from Elizabeth," she tells him, yet still looking in my direction. I only know because when I finally raise my eyes, her eyes lock on mine instantly. "I was really starting to like him and that's hard for a married woman like me to find."

"You were never going to keep him around. He was too old for you, anyways," Christian says.

"Why? Why did you do it?" She turns her gaze to him.

"I didn't."

"You'd lie right to my face while I hold a gun to yours?" She creases her eyebrows. I fear for Christians life. I want to push her out of the way and shove a knife in her heart.

"I'm not. I personally didn't do it."

"I have the footage. The camera from the garage his car was parked at. I have the footage of Sawyer cutting his break lines. I know it was you behind it!" She screams.

"So it seems it was," he concedes seriously. His face is of stone.

"I want you to write me a check for two billion dollars or I'll go to the police with the tape," she demands. His eyes flicker to her, then to me, and then back to her..

"Is that all? Will you leave?" he asks her without breaking eye contact. Elena gives him an evil grin and cocks her head to the side and slowly turns her eyes to me. Her arm follows her eyes and I find myself staring down the barrel of the gun Elena is holding. I hear Christian take a deep, sharp breath. My heart stops for a second and I take a step back. I can't even make myself look at Christian because that means I would be looking away from this gun that could potentially end my life.

"Maybe I should just kill her?" Her eyes scan me from head to toe and she smiles. I don't care if he gives Elena every penny he has...as long as I have him. My eyes swell up with tears and I wrap my arms around myself. I'm finally able to rip my eyes away and look at Christian and he takes the opportunity now that Elena isn't looking or point a gun at him. He lunges for her. Christian body crushes her to the ground and her head bounces of the marble floor with a loud distinct crack. Simultaneously, the gun goes off. My heart stops as the wall near me explodes with the impact of the bullet.. Christian eyes lock on mine for a split second and then he scans my body. He turns and reaches for her hand and swipes the gun away. Her body is limp on the ground. He looks back to me and springs to his feet. My eyes are glued to Elena's lifeless looking body. He closes the gap between us in a few steps, his arms wrapping tight around me.

"Ana," he whispers into my hair. He holds me as I cry.

"Is she dead?" I ask between sobs.

"Shhh," he tries to calm me and rubs the back of my head. "Come." He scoops me into his arms and carries me to his bedroom.

He sets me down on my feet and walks across the room to grab his phone off the end table. Setting the gun down where his phone was. He presses the screen a few times and puts the phone up to his ear, his eyes staring at me. Tears are still streaming down my face as the adrenaline starts to wear off. My body starts shaking as if I'm freezing cold.

"She came here... No here!..." He looks over his shoulder at me. "Dead. She had a gun and the tape of Sawyer cutting the breaks!... You said you would get it!... We are leaving...Now." he says into his phone and pulls it back away from his ear. He tosses it onto the bed and runs his hand through his hair. I just gaze at him, stunned at all the commotion that just happened and wondering how I am standing in one piece right now.

"We are leaving for a few days." He walks over to me pulling me into another embrace. "If she would have killed you..." he breaks off and runs his hands in my hair, kissing the top of my head. His heartbeat is fast against my cheek.

"Christian... she could've shot you!" Tears start flowing harder down my face.

"I was never worried about myself, Ana - only you. I will fill you in on everything once we are somewhere else. Quickly grab some clothes. Taylor will be here in 2 minutes." I can't move my feet, they feel like a thousand pounds each right now. "Quickly, Ana," he urges. I blink at him a few times and then turn to the closet. I fill a large Coach bag with random clothing that looks comfortable and change into black leggings and a large sweatshirt. I throw on my black sneakers and in a records time I emerge into the bedroom with my bag in hand. He is facing the closed door running his hands through his hair again.

"Do you want to go bald?" I want to facepalm myself for saying that right now. Considering the situation, a joke might not be appropriate. He turns to me and eyes my bag.

"Stay in here." He lightly brushes past me and into the closet. He comes back out of the closet fully dressed and carrying his own black bag. He walks over to the bed and sets his bag down, unzipping it and placing the gun deep in his bag. He closes it, picks it up, and walks over to me. He takes my bag from me and walks toward the door. He looks back.

"Where are we going?" I ask. He ignores my question.

"Stay in here till I come get you." He opens the door, slips out, and shuts it behind him.

 **Edited By: dontcare89**


	24. Chapter 24

**Here are some answers, some yet to be answered.**

 **thank you all for reading and all the reviews!**  
 **and my beta, dontcare89**

* * *

This feels like a dream. I can't just stand around and wait to find out if she is really dead. I need to know. I walk slowly to the door and, as quietly as I can, open it just enough to peek out. I see Christian standing and looking down at Elena. His chin is in his hand and his arm is crossed across his stomach. Her body is still motionless on the ground. The elevator dings and I hear heavy footsteps that could only belong to Taylor.

"What happened?" I can't see him but I imagine that he looks very shocked.

"I need to get Ana out of here," Christian replies and looks up from the body. I finally see Taylor when he approaches her and kneels. He reaches and feels her neck for a pulse. He looks up at Christian.

"She has a faint pulse. We need to get an ambulance here."

"She is going to pray I killed her when she wakes up. I'm going to do everything in my power to put her in a psychiatric hospital. You said you had eyes on her."

"She slipped away..."

"We're not done talking about this. I should fire you."

I shut the door quietly and lean against the wall. She's not dead? I close my eyes and wrap my head around everything that is happening. The door clicks open beside me and Christian is startled to find me standing next to it. Tears roll down my face.

"Hey. Hey," he whispers. He stands in front of me and cups my face with both of his hands. "It's over. Okay? I promise you, it's over." He takes a deep breath and runs one hand through my hair, his eyes scanning my face. I try to sniffle quietly but I don't succeed. I must look like a blubbering child.

"Is it?" This will never be over with Elena still alive. "What's going to happen to her?" I sniffle again.

"She is going to be locked away where all the other crazy people are."

I can't feel my body and my mind is scrambling for answers. "I thought she killed you. For a second, I thought..."

"We can talk about this later. Come, the helicopter is waiting on the roof for us. I'm gonna get you out of here." I feel my heart racing.

"Don't you need to call the police?" I ask, confused. "It was clearly self defense but they will want to question us. They will want our side of the story."

"Don't worry about that," he says and let's go of my face and turns to walk out but stops short. He looks over his shoulder at me slowly and then turns his body back to face me.

"Don't look, okay?"

"But I feel like we are running..."

"Taylor will take care of it. Let's go." He's stern but not mean. His adrenaline is pumping through his body just as fast as mine is. He's angry at the situation but trying not to take it out on me. I can tell he in holding back a lot of emotion and it scares me.

He grabs my hand and pulls me into the living room. My eyes instantly dart to Elena's body on the floor before I look around at the mess; the vase in pieces on the ground and table. Christian quickly picks up pace but I still stop for a millisecond by her body. If I stopped any longer, Christian would have pulled me right off my feet. We walk into the foyer and he pulls me into a spot where I can't see her body any longer. I'm grateful, actually. I feel like I'm going to be sick.

I focus on my breathing, trying not to pass out. Taylor approaches us from behind.

"Sir, everything will be cleared when you return," he states. For the first time since meeting Taylor, he looks nervous. Christian's eyes dart to mine, he takes a deep breath and then acknowledges Taylor.

"Make sure everything is taken care of," he says with a nod and wraps his arm around my back, turning me so we can get in the elevator. We only have to go up a floor before the doors open to the cool night air. The helicopter is sitting in the middle of the helipad. He keeps moving me forward with his hand sprawled out on my back. He helps me into the passenger seat, making sure all the straps are tight... too tight. He finishes by throwing our bags behind the seat. We make eye contact several times but we don't talk. You could cut the tension in the air with a knife right now. He gets into the seat next to me and flicks some switches till she purrs to life. He rambles a few statements into his headset and we take off.

Even though the situation around us may be chaotic, I can't help but smile when I'm in the air with Christian. It is both terrifying and exciting but I feel safe with him. I catch him looking at me a few times but he still doesn't talk. We fly over Seattle in the night. I find myself looking more into the vast night sky than the bustling city below. The stars are peaceful.

I finally kill the silence after a few minutes. "Where are you taking me?" I look over to him and he doesn't turn to face me. I can see a smile flash on his face for a second, though.

"Somewhere we can be alone," he finally says.

"Is it far?" I ask into the headset.

"We will be there soon." He looks over to me. "Do you trust me?" He asks seriously.

"Of course I do." I look back at him, puzzled.

"Good." He looks in front of him and does a sharp turn toward the harbor.

* * *

The boat in front of me is gorgeous. I have never been so close to something like this. Across the side reads The Grace.

"After your mother?" I ask him as we board. He flashes a smile at me and proceeds to lead me to the lower cabin of the boat. We enter a room nearly the size of my old apartment, complete with a bathroom, desk, dresser, flat screen tv, and King bed. My knees instantly turn to jello when I see the bed. I haven't realized how exhausted I really am. I look over to Christian.

"This is an amazing boat, Christian," I say as he sets our bags on the desk. He walks over to me and lightly touches my face.

"Only place I know we are completely alone," he says, his eyes scanning my face. "How about you go lay down. I'm going to take us out to sea. I will be back in a little bit."

"Can't I come watch?" I ask but he laughs at me. I tilt my head at what could possibly be so funny.

"Not tonight. I don't want to worry about you falling overboard in the dark." He runs the back of his fingers down my cheek. "I already could have lost you once tonight."

He frowns. I don't have the energy to fight with him right now but I don't want to be alone. I have questions and I want answers.

"Hurry back," I say as he kisses the top of my head. He turns and leaves. I take a moment to look around the room again. He sure does have expensive taste. I run my fingers over the solid wood dresser and then across the fabric of the bed before crawling under the covers. The light in the room is dim so I feel no need to turn it off. I replay the whole night in my head over and over. I wonder what I could have done differently. Would I have done anything differently? I suddenly remember Jack is dead and tears of relief pour from me and soon I am full blown sobbing.

I take a deep breath and roll onto my stomach. I burry my face in between the pillows and quickly fall asleep. I wake up a few times through the night but Christian is never beside me in bed though one time I swear I see a shadow sitting in a chair on the other side of the room. I succumbed back into sleep too fast to investigate.

The morning light through the porthole window wakes me up. I sit up in bed and investigate my surroundings. It takes me a second to remember where I am and in that second I also remember the night before. My chest instantly hurts with the memory. The room starts to spin so I put my palm to my forehead and squeeze my eyes shut. My stomach twists and turns with the feeling of being sick. I throw the covers off of me and cover my mouth with my hand. I luckily make it to the bathroom just in time to upchuck the very little contents of my stomach. After heaving a few more times and getting everything out, I flush the contents and sit back to wipe the thin layer of sweat from across my brow. When the room isn't spinning anymore, I pull myself up to my feet and wash my mouth out. I look in the mirror and the girl looking back is tied and worn. She looks like she could use three days of sleep. I run my fingers through my hair and make my way to Christian.

I feel better when I hit the open air. It's cooler out here that in the city but the sun feels warm on my skin. All I can see is the water around us, rippling in small waves. It's peaceful. The slight breeze sends the smell of the ocean my way. It's calming, clearing my mind. I close my eyes and wrap my arms around myself.

"I love it out here." His voice says calmly from next to me. I slowly open my eyes and look over to him. He has showered and changed but looks exhausted.

"I can see why." I smile . He slowly walks over to me. I watch his every movement as he stops to stand in front of me.

"How are you feeling?" he asks.

I just shrug back at him; I honestly can't answer how I'm feeling. I am drained physically as well as mentally. I don't think I could take any more commotion right now.

"I just wanted to keep you safe. Locking you away from the danger only brought the danger to you. I can't stop thinking about if I lost you..." He closes his eyes and shakes his head. He places his hands on my shoulders and runs them down my arms. I reach up and cup his face with my hands.

"Did you sleep at all?"

"I got a call from Taylor. Elena is in a hospital in Maine. She's on life support." His eyes glaze over and he presses his lips together. "I rather she died."

"You had Jack killed?" His expression changes when the question leaves my mouth. He ponders for a second before answering.

"I watched you sleep all night. You looked so peaceful. I picture all the 'what ifs' of yesterday and couldn't stop thinking about what it would have been like to lose you." He tucks some hair behind my ear. The motion sending shivers down my spine.

"I need answers, Christian. I need the truth."

"I know. Come, you need to eat." Right when he says that I feel my stomach twist and knot. I run to the side of the boat and get sick. Christian is instantly at my side. His arm wraps around my back and he closes his hand around my side. He holds me upright.

"Are you not feeling well?" he asks. I don't turn to look at his face, feeling embarrassed I just puked in front of him. It wouldn't be the first time, though.

"It's just motion sickness. I'm also overwhelmed," I say, looking down into the water. I finally turn and look up at him. He puts his hands on both sides of my rib cage. He creases his brow as he scans my face for a second. He then softens his expression and pushes some of my hair behind my shoulder.

"You should lay down. We can talk later."

"I want to talk now," I demand.

"You are unwell, Ana." He starts to lead me back to the door that takes us down to the interior. He holds my hand and walks slightly in front of me.

"Will you lay down with me?" I ask. He glances back at me.

"For a little while. You need rest." He keeps walking.

"I need answers more," I say. He freezes. We are halfway down the stairs now. He turns around and we are eye to eye.

"I had Jack killed. Yes. Do I regret it? No. The rest are just minor details, Ana."

"What about police? What about getting in trouble? We..." I start rambling and I can feel my heartbeat quickening.

"I thought you trusted me," he says sternly.

"I do."

"Then trust me." He turns and leads me to the bed where he lays down with me. Pulling me to his chest and running his fingers on my scalp, I close my eyes. After a few minutes, Christian takes a deep breath.

"Jack was going to kill you. They found plans in his apartment to kidnap, rape, and kill you." He pauses. I feel my body tense. "Then he was going to deliver your lifeless body on my front step. I had to stop him before that happened."

I look up at him through my lashes and I see the tears running down his face. I reach up with my hand and cup his cheek, wiping away a tear with my thumb. He looks down at me. Knowing this information makes me feel sick. I feel nausea coming on but I just close my eyes and I feel myself calming. I slowly open them again.

"If you ever need a reason to why I do anything I do, just look in the mirror. I will never let anyone touch a hair on your head. I will pay whatever, I will do whatever, I will _kill_ whoever – all to protect you."

His words soothe me and scare me. He's killed one person and tried to kill someone else, all to protect me. How far is this going to go?


	25. Chapter 25

**Hi everyone!**  
 **I hope you enjoy this next chapter, it has a little bit of everything.**  
 **more answers to come next chapter!**

 **Thank you for reading and for the reviews,**  
 **it keeps me going when I sometimes was to give up.**

 **-A xoxo**

* * *

I wake to the sound of water lightly crashing against the outside of the boat. Christian is passed out beside me, his arm draped heavily over my stomach. I slowly slide out from under him. I tiptoe out of the room and make my way up to the deck. He needs sleep more than I do. I walk around and examine the craftsmanship of the boat, touching the carvings in the woodwork. I find a lounge chair in the sun and lay down and close my e yes, enjoying the feel of the sun on my skin. I have been cooped up in the apartment for two weeks and I have been craving the sun on my skin like this. I listen to water against the boat. The breeze is refreshing and cools my skin from the humid air.

I sit there for some time before I feel my skin turning red and decide I need to find somewhere to cool down. When I stand up I almost fall backward, bumping into Christian. He catches me by my elbow with his left hand.

"Whoa!" I gasp.

"How long have you been out here? You look like you caught some sun." He runs the back of his fingers along my cheek. His fingers feel cool against my warm skin. I squint up at him. He pulls me into the shade. After a few seconds, my vision adjusts to the light change.

"Not long, I don't think. I lost track of time. I didn't want to wake you. You need the sleep," I say. He smirks at me.

"I guess that is true. How are you feeling?"

"Better, actually." It wasn't until he said something that I forgot all about getting sick earlier.

"Good. Let's eat." He grabs my hand and leads me to two seats in the shade. He motions for me to sit down and I realize he has a small basket in his hand. I giggle.

"Did you make it?" I smile at him. He arches an eyebrow at me.

"Why is that so funny, Ms. Steele?"

"The thought of you making food just makes me smile." I look up at him.

"You are the only person I will ever make food for," he laughs back. He sits down and opens the basket. Inside are two sandwiches and some salad. The food feels good in my empty stomach. We eat in silence, occasionally glancing at each other but, halfway through my salad, a question bubbles to the surface that I just can't ignore.

"Why didn't we come out here two weeks ago?" His eyes dart to mine. He swallows what is in his mouth and puts his food down. He looks away from me for a second and runs his hand through his hair.

"I thought it better to stay where we were; to guarantee that nothing would happen to you. Even just bringing you here was risky. I needed to know it was safe first. I had planned to take you here as soon as everything was taken care of but... things didn't go as planned. Taylor and I didn't see eye to eye on a few things," His phone starts ringing. He pulls his phone out of his pocket in a swift move. Not taking his eyes off mine, he answers it.

"Is it done?" he asks. Whoever is on the other end gives him an answer he is pleased with. He smiles at me and ends his call.

"We can go home anytime now." He reaches forward and grabs my hand.

"I would like to stay out here for a bit, if you don't mind. Until we run out of food or something. I think I need a break from..." I sigh, "all that."

He smirks at me.

"We have about three days worth of stuff."

"All I wanted was you to myself these last two weeks. I don't know if three days is enough."

He takes a deep breath. He puts his food on a nearby table and takes what I had left of mine and moves it. He pulls his chair closer to mine and sits down. His face is now inches from mine, his knees touching the front of my chair. He is so close it's intimidating.

"A lifetime with you wouldn't be enough." His eyes dart down to my lips. He quickly looks back up, his eyes gazing into mine. I feel my cheeks redden as I blush. I want to push my chair away but, at the same time, I want to throw myself at him. I hear myself panting, my body yearning for his. I want him to touch me but, instead, his hands are on either side of my chair. My hands are in my lap, rubbing together as I feel them getting clammy now.

"How about we go downstairs and you show me a preview of what a lifetime of being with Christian Grey is going to be like?" I giggle. His face lights up.

"Oh, I can do that." His one hand reaches out and touches my leg. His thumb starts rubbing circles up my inner thigh.

I am just about to reach out and touch him when his phone rings again. He rolls his eyes and pulls it out of his pocket, his hand still on my leg.

"It's my father."

"Dad," he answers. His eyes stay focused on mine until Carrick says something that catches him off guard. His hand on my leg thigh tightens causing me to flinch. He instantly lets go and stands up.

"That's a misunderstanding," he says firmly to Carrick. He looks sternly at me then walks away, but I can still hear him talking. "I know she told you... I know we do... I know but she had a gun to Ana's face... I wasn't going to let that happen... I... Wait... Yes." He hangs up the phone. He turns around slowly and looks at me. His eyes scan my face for a second. "We have to go back. I need to speak with my parents."

"We have to leave right now?" My heart is racing with disappointment. He fiddles with the phone for a second and then puts it in his pocket. He walks over and sits in front of me again. I look down at my hands and I feel the sudden urge to cry with disappointment that we don't get to be alone out here. I hold back my pain from being shown on the outside. Christian lifts my chin up with his finger and makes me look at him.

"We can spare an hour." He smiles. I fill with butterflies and I can't help but smile back. I could live with an hour alone if that's the alternative to none.

"When will I get some answers?" I pout. "I feel like I missed a lot of information. Where were your men? Why was no one watching the elevator?"

"The less you know the better. For now anyways." He tips his head to the side and squints his eyes at me. "Do you want to spend the next hour talking or..." he leans forward slowly and starts kissing my neck. I close my eyes and let out a breath I was holding in. He stops and pulls away from my neck. His hot breath lingers on my throat for a second before he pulls back enough so I can see his eyes.

"I choose that," I say, panting. He smiles and stands. He pulls me up with him and then throwing me over his shoulder. I squeal like a little girl. "Put me down!" I giggle as he swings around and walks toward the back of the boat where the door to the downstairs is.

"For the next hour my hands are not leaving this body," he says. I gasp. "Another hour wouldn't hurt." He mumbles as we descend down the stairs.

* * *

Taylor is picking us up from the dock. He's waiting anxiously at the end. I can tell he is nervous as his body is more tense than usual and his eyes are down.

"Are you going to fire him? I don't want you to." I look up at Christian as we continue to walk down the dock. He doesn't look at me but answers.

"I haven't decided."

"Oh," I whisper. He glances at me from the corner of his eye. The idea of not having Taylor around would actually sadden me. I have grown accustomed to having him around and I feel safe. Not as safe as when Christian is by my side but I know that Taylor would also lay his life down for me. The idea both saddens and comforts me. I greet Taylor with a smile. He doesn't look up at me but opens the door. His quiet tone is alarming. I give Christian a look but he nods toward the car, ushering me to get in. I get in just as he is handing Taylor the bags. The door shuts.

I can hear them talking but it's muffled. I catch words like "job" and "from now on". I play with the hem of my summer dress. I'm exhausted from our afternoon.

He was so gentle with me, making love as if it were the first time. Every time with him feels just as exciting and new as the last. I never know which Christian I am going to get in bed but the thought excites me. He never stops amazing me with how he can make me feel.

I turn a little in the seat and rest my head against the soft leather. I'm thankful for the tinted windows as it blocks out the glaring sun. I feel sad I'm not lying back in the sun on the boat, listening to the boat rock in the waves. The door opens and I watch as he slides in and looks over to me. He studies how I'm sitting and how my knees are up on the seat and almost touching his. He smiles at me.

"I really just want to take you home and finish our afternoon the same way it started." His flashes his teeth at me. Taylor slides into the driver's seat and we pull away. I look out the back window at the dock.

"I really want to be back on the boat right now." I pout. I glance over at him. He lowers his eyes to my exposed legs.

"You act as though I don't want that to. Things are complicated right now. I need to speak with my father immediately." He looks back up at me.

"Maybe we can come back out here for a weekend sometime soon. Just the two of us." He nods. I look back out the window but the dock is far in the distance now. I spin around and cross my arms. Looking out the side window and angling my body away from him. I feel his eyes on me. We sit in silence for a few minutes.

"Can you please talk to me, Anastasia?" he asks. He reaches out and strokes my arm lightly. I look down at his hand and then up at him over my shoulder.

"I am just confused, that's all" I sigh. I set my chin on my shoulder and look down at his other hand. Not wanting to make eye contact with him, I decide to study the lines in his hands but it only leads to me thinking about his hands on my body and I get flustered. I look away.

"Are you confused about wanting to be with me? Are you regretting accepting my proposal?" he asks. I snap my head in his direction. My mouth falls slightly open.

"I'm appalled you think I would leave. No." I shake my head. "I'm confused about everything and I'm worried you're going to get arrested, Christian." I look nervously at Taylor and then back to Christian. I whisper, "you had a man killed, for Gads sake." I sniffle and shake my head. "I am not upset Jack's dead." I shake my head slowly with my eyes closed to stop myself from losing my mind. "I am upset that you could go to prison." I slowly open my watery eyes and look at him. His eyes narrow. His hand on my shoulder flexes.

"Would it be so bad if I tell you not to worry about these things? Everything was carefully done." He leans forward and gets close. "Ana, I will never go to jail – ever. Don't worry about something that will never be."

"But if she got the tape, can't others?" I ask. He studies my face for a second.

"She got the tape from the same person who used to hack your email at SIP and plant the evidence. That person has been heavily paid off and papers have been signed that it will never lead back to me. Jack had an accident and that's how it will remain to the world. There are a handful of people who know and none who will talk." He takes a breath. "The only thing that matters is your safety. No one will ever harm you, my sweet Ana..." He reaches up and strokes my face. "I would kill a thousand people if it meant keeping you safe." His words send a sharp chill through my whole body. He eyes me curiously. He sits back as rubs his chin. I'm unable to answer him, my head swirling around his words of committing mass murder to protect me. I turn and look back out the window. His words feel wrong.

"How are you feeling?" He asks, his words cutting through the silence. I slowly turn and look at him.

"Better, I suppose. My body is really tired though. More than usual." I look back out the window. "I told you it was motion sickness; all the rocking and such. I just need my land legs back." I feel like I'm talking to my reflection. I hear him shuffle and change position.

"Taylor." He barks loudly.

"Sir."

"Head to Escala," he says.

"Sir," Taylor nods.

I snap my head towards Christian. "I thought we were going to your parents?" I ask, confused.

"I am," he answers back. I know that means he is going to leave me at Escala, alone. Right now, that is the last thing I want. I turn and look out the window the rest of the way, my arms tightly crossed in front of me.

* * *

When Christian leaves, I pace Escala for over an hour. Images of that night flash through my head and make it hard to concentrate. He said he won't be back till late so I decide I won't stay cooped up here any longer. If the threat is gone then I see no harm in going to the market down at the pier.

At least I can enjoy the sunshine in some way. I grab a pair of sunglasses, my purse, and head towards the elevator.

I look around for Sawyer. I hear him on the phone in the small office off the foyer. I tiptoe to the elevator and press the button. I hope I can slide in and shut the doors before Sawyer sees or hears. The doors shoot open. I hear Sawyer stop talking and I know I only have seconds. I dash in and press the button to close the door. The last thing I see is Sawyer's surprised face. I shrug my shoulders at him and give him an apologetic smile.

I fumble with my keys and drop them twice before I reach my car, afraid to look over my shoulder and see Sawyer. I manage to get out of the garage and once my tires hit the road, I feel a sense of release and freedom. I know Sawyer called Christian right away anyway.

I get to the market and the birds are chirping under the shining sun. It feels so good. I walk around the bustling people till the sky starts to dim with the colors of a sunset. I smile at an adorable little girl I see holding her mother's hand. She waves to me and I give her a wave back. I can't help but stare at her copper hair and bright blue eyes.

Suddenly a teen in a short yellow dress bumps into my arm causing me to lose balance and fall over and onto the ground. I quickly get up and compose myself. I look over at her. She's with a tall, dark-skinned girl who is very pretty. Her hair falls to her shoulders in tight black curls. The girl who bumped into me was a shorter blonde girl with average features. She scowls at me.

"I'm sorry, I just got distracted looking at..." I look back towards the little girl but she is gone now. This saddens me for some reason.

"Watch where you're going, bitch!" She snaps at me. I am taken aback by this girl's attitude; she bumped into me to begin with. I don't even have a second to respond before she throws her long, blond hair over her shoulder like we're in a shampoo commercial. I roll my eyes as the girls walk in front of me and continue on with their day. I brush my dress flat and walk slowly down the market strip. I barely look up from the ground, only to gaze at what people are selling.

I'm looking down when I notice the familiar feet of the girl in the yellow dress. Her matching yellow shoes make her hard to miss. She is stopped dead in the middle of the market. Her friend frozen in place too. I stare at them for a second from the side. I follow their eyes and they lead me to him.

Christian is standing not too far from us in his v-neck, white t-shirt and dark blue jeans. He stands out in the crowd. His eyes are coldly staring at me, his head tilted to the side. People passing by glance at him but the girls next to me are gawking. It's highly annoying. I hear the word "Grey" in her conversation with her friends.

He's angry. Angry probably doesn't cover how he feels. The girls notice he isn't looking at them and start whispering to each other again. They turn their heads to their left and the blonde's eyes narrow on me.

"What are you starting at?" she grunts at me.

"You drooling over my future husband," I say with a smile on my face. She twists her face up in a disgusted manner.

"You wish," she spits.

My eyes flicker back to Christian. He is now slowly walking towards me. His one hand tucked into his pocket. His other freely hanging by his side. The girls next to me do a double take to make sure they see he is walking right towards me and not them.

"Hi," I say. His demeanor almost makes me cower. He doesn't even pay attention to the two girls who were so nasty to me previously. He places one hand on my lower back and pulls me to him. He bends down and whispers in my ear, to passersbys it looks like he is kissing my cheek.

"Do you have any idea what I had to go through to find you?" He growls. His fingers flex on my back. He pulls away and looks down on me.

"There isn't a threat anymore, Christian. Please. You're making a scene." I look around us. We have gathered some attention; it's not everyday that Christian Grey is seen out in a public place with a girl. The two teens continue to stare at us in disbelief. I know I'm already in trouble, so why not push it a little further?

I pull Christian's face to mine and give him a hard kiss, probably a little more hot than what would normally be considered acceptable in a public setting. When we pull back I can practically hear the girls crying but my eyes are glued to Christian.

"Let's get you home, Ms. Steele," Christian says in an authoritative voice but his smile gives him away. We link hands and head back out through the market, leaving the girls, the onlookers, and my sour mood in the past.

 **Huge shout out to my beta for her help with this chapter!- _dontcare89_**


	26. Chapter 26

**UPDATE:** I have had so much going on in my personal life that I have not had the emotional connection with this story that it involved to continue. I will be getting a hold of my beta this week to continue with this story if Fans think it is worth finishing. I have some ideas to which can lead to a few different ending and have to decide what path to take. If you would like me to continue please write a review and I will read them all! Thank you for your patients and thank you for sticking by and waiting.

I have not given up hope for these two as I loved their growing relationship.

xoxo-A


	27. Chapter 27

**I had to reload the chapter, people where having a problem with the email link.**

* * *

 **I was blown away from all your responses to continue this story!**

 **My heart is so full that so many of you hung on and were still there for me,  
I can't thank you all enough for your words of encouragement.**

 **Here is the new chapter I promised.  
Wrote with lots of deliberation as to were I was going to head this story.**

 **Hope ya'll like it!  
-A**

* * *

I wake to the soft touch of fingers along my cheek. I slowly open my eyes to see Christian standing next to the bed. He is crouched down slightly so I can see his face. The room is filled with the soft hue of morning light.

"I didn't mean to wake you," he says as his fingers trail along my jaw. I blink slowly a few times before yawning. "I have to go into work today. There are some things that need my personal attention. Go back to sleep." He leans in and kisses my forehead, my nostrils instantly filled with the smell of his fresh cologne.

"Too late now," I mumble. He frowns at me.

"I will be back before dinner. If you decide to go anywhere, take Sawyer with you," he says sternly. I look up at him through my eyelashes. I take in his professional dress attire: a dark navy suit with crisp white shirt and matching tie. He looks strait out of a magazine with his hair combed perfectly to the side and slight stubble.

"Yes, Sir," I agree back. He gives me one last kiss on my cheek and walks out the room. Without warning, I doze back off and into a sweet sleep.

I wake and take a minute to stretch in bed before sitting up. As soon as my feet touch the ground my stomach knots and it sends me flying to the bathroom. I dry heave for a few minutes before I can finally sit back on the cold tile. My body is covered in a thin layer of sweat and my pulse is racing fast. I take a few minutes to steady my breathing and gulp down the last few feelings of nausea. As fast as it came, it went.

I get up off the floor to quickly get in the shower and wash off the sweat. The usually hot shower I take has turned into a cool one. The water feels good against my hot skin and I stand there, soaking it in.

I can't still be sick from the boat. My mind races over all the options. Could I have just sat up too fast? Food poisoning? The flu? Then my mind crosses the idea that I could be pregnant. Christian and I have gotten so caught up in the idea of being back together I never went on any form of birth control. It slipped my mind to call and make an appointment.

Still wrapped in a towel, I find my phone under the blankets in bed. I pull up my calendar up and count the days since my last period. 1 day. 2 days... 3 days... 8 days late. I have never been late before. My body has always been good to me in that way, promising to come on the same day every month. I drop my phone back on the bed and sit on the edge. I stare out over the city through the wall of windows. My eyes graze down to my towel-covered stomach.

In our last conversation about children, Christian made it very clear he didn't want any, at least not yet. What will he say? I stand up quickly and go to the bathroom. In front of the long mirror I drop the towel to the floor and examine my body. It looks the same as it always has, no changes at all. I turn to the side and picture what I will look like with a swollen belly and larger breasts. My fingers trail down my abdomen. A baby.

Before I get too worked up, I must know for sure. Maybe the stress of Elena trying to kill me and now being alive on life support halfway around the country is enough stress to make me late. As calm as I can, I do my makeup and hair. I venture into the closet and find a short bell skirt and light blue tank top. I place on matching black flats from the wall of endless shoe choices.

I struggle to get some food in my stomach. I settle on a bowl of cereal and some orange juice. I grab my purse and phone; now it's almost 10:30. I make my way to find Sawyer, I need to get to a drug store.

"Sawyer." I find him in the lobby sitting in a chair with a newspaper in front of him. He stands up immediately.

"Ma'am." He is always so formal and it irritates me.

"Can you take me to a drug store. I need..." I stop for a second, thinking of a good excuse to go to a drug store when I could easily send someone for anything I need. Not this, though; this is something I need to do on my own. "Women thing," I finally finish and feel my cheeks turn red.

"Absolutely." He is just as embarrassed as I am.

The ride down in the elevator is just as awkward. I try not to think about the possibility of being with child but it's all my mind wants to flash in front of me. I smile when I think about a little copper head boy or girl running into Christian's arms calling him daddy. My smile instantly turns to a frown when I think back to our conversation on him not wanting kids.

We walk in silence to the car. I usually am chatty but today I just have so much on my mind that having a conversation is the last thing I want. What I really want is to see Christian.

We pull up to a small drug store only two blocks from Escala. I ask Sawyer stay in the car because I don't need him watching me buy a pregnancy test. He just nods.

"I will only be a few minutes," I say sliding out of the blacked out SUV. A few eyes were staring heavily at the car but turned when they saw no one famous coming out. I feel relieved no eyes are on me.

I make my way to the tampon aisle where at the very end I find the pregnancy tests. I stare at them. There are so many different kinds to all tell me the same outcome. I grab a digital one that seems to be the most promising. I also grab tampons knowing if I come out without them that might look suspicious. I cash out with my eyes never meeting those of the cashier's. I turn right around and follow the signs the bathroom in the back. Thankfully it's not a public restroom and I can lock the door behind me.

I tremble as I pull out of the box the white wrapped stick with Clear Blue written all over. I stare at it for a second before ripping open the thick plastic. I take a deep breath and do it before I overthink it.

Two minutes seems like a lifetime when waiting for a result to appear on the screen. I don't sit and watch for it. I pace around the bathroom. A few times checking my phone making sure not to miss a call from Christian. Watching the time slowly change from 10:53 to 10:54 to finally 10:55. I take a deep breath and turn around to look at the white stick on the edge of the bathroom sink.

Pregnant.

I reread it over and over. Almost falling to my knees in disbelief. What am I going to do? More like what is Christian going to say? I put the stick deep in my purse and throw away all other evidence. Wiping the sweat from my brow I leave the bathroom. Almost bumping into Sawyer.

"Ma'am. Is everything okay?" he asks. I must have taken longer than I thought.

"Yes. Yes." I press my lips together and shake my head. "Just not feeling so well." I show him the bag to indicate I'm done shopping.

"Do you need to see a doctor?" he ask and raises an eyebrow. He looks puzzled and worried.

"No, no." I wave my hand at him and give him a nervous sounding giggle. "I just need rest."

He gives me a nod and we head to the car.

"Sawyer," I call out to him from the backseat after he starts the engine.

"Ma'am." He looks into the rearview mirror and we make eye contact for a split second.

"Can you take me to Grey Enterprise?" I ask. I have no idea how Christian will react to me just showing up. I hope I don't bother him but I really just need to see him.

"Yes ma'am." I sit back in my seat and watch the passing cars.

We pull up to Grey Enterprise and I see Sawyer start to unbuckle.

"Stay here." He gives me another worried look when I say this. "Please."

He nods slowly at me but I can still feel his reluctancy.

I get out of the car and head for the entrance. I feel just as nervous coming here now as I did the first day I met Christian. So much has changed in such a short time that I suddenly get overwhelmed. I shake my head to clear my thoughts and push the door open. I attempt to make a straight walk to the elevators but the woman at the front counter stops me. She is impeccably dressed and groomed; not a hair out of place. Her blond locks tightly pulled back into a low bun and her dark red pant suit reminds me of the red room, the thought unsettling now.

"Excuse me, Miss. Can I help you?" Her tone is polite.

"Umm, yes. I'm here to see Chr... Mr. Grey." I say back with a small smile.

"Do you have an appointment?" She looks down at her computer and types something in quickly. Her eyes flicker up at me. I realize I haven't answered back yet.

"No," I respond quietly.

"Oh." Her fingers leave the keyboard and she slowly stands up from her chair. Her hands flatten any wrinkle lines that have formed on her pants. "Mr. Grey doesn't allow visitors unless they have an appointment. I'm sorry."

I was about to demand to see him but the last thing I want to do right now is cause a scene.

"Can you let him know Ana is here?" I ask with a now fake smile. I feel slightly annoyed. My emotions are not in check and that sends me into a even more of a panic. I am tempted to touch my stomach at the thought of why I feel so flustered. Instead, keep my hands steady in a ball in front of me.

"I am sorry, Miss, but a meeting with Mr. Grey is by appointment only," she repeats. I feel a frown cross my face.

"Maybe if you just call him and tell him who it is," I say back.

"If you would like to make an appointment for next..." She looks down at her computer. "Fall. We can schedule one but if not I am going to have to ask you to leave."

I go to open my mouth to reply when the large lobby falls to a hush behind me. Girls in impeccable clothing whispering in the corner are still as they stare. I feel his eyes on me. Knowing he's so close makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. Christian has this effect on people, on woman, to cause them to melt their insides with lust. Even his own employees are drawn to him. I watch the secretary's eyes linger behind me and her posture straightening up to it most poise position.

"Anastasia." His voice rings. I turn around and he is only a few feet from me.

"Hi. I'm sorry to bother you. I just wanted to see you." I say and he closes the gap between us in a few strides. His arm wraps around my back as his other hand finds the curve of my cheek. His smell fills the air around us and our lips touch. I hear the lady in red behind us gasp. She is probably regretting not letting me up now. He pulls away all too soon. I can tell by his eyes that his mood is light and he is pleased to see me.

"No need to apologize baby." He smiles. "Sawyer called. He mentioned you arn't feeling well and when he said he dropped you off I got worried when you didn't come up. Is everything alright?" I quickly flicker my eyes down to my stomach. Now is not the time to discuss this. I look up at him.

"Yes. Perfectly. I was missing you that's all." I smile at him and give him a small shrug of my shoulders. I look back at the secretary who is now sitting down with her eyes locked on her computer. I let out a small laugh and look back to Christian. "Next time I stop by, should I make sure to have an appointment? Your staff here is all very professional."

His demeanor changes. He looks to the lady in red. "Janice, next time you see my fiancé make sure to send her straight up. I don't like to be kept waiting." I look back to her. Her face has paled and her mouth slightly open.

"Yes, Mr. Grey. My apologies." I watch her swallow hard and her body language turn to that of someone clearly uncomfortable. He steps away but his one hand never leaves my back.

"Let's go to my office," he says softly. I wonder if this will be our last normal day together. Then again, no day with Christian is normal. The walk to the elevator seemed to take longer than it should have. I felt like everyone was staring at me. Staring at my invisible bump hiding under my dress. I make eye contact with a few people and give them shy smiles but underneath I feel like they should be minding their own business. It irritates me how people stare at us like they have never seen a man and a woman together before. When we reach the office he locks the door behind him and I let out the long breath I had been holding.

"Is something wrong?" He pulls me into his arms and squeezes me to him. I find myself worrying if he is squeezing too hard and could possibly hurt the baby. The thought is ridiculous and I push it to the back of my mind. I laugh at myself realizing how stupid my own thoughts can be.

"No. Did I take you away from something important? I can leave."

"Anastasia." His voice is so soft that my heart starts to purr inside my chest. "There is nothing in this world more important than you."

A slight tug of reassurance makes me feel slightly better about this situation. His fingers trace along my cheekbone and his brows press together.

"You look very pale." His voice is filled with worry and tenderness. I place my hand over his.

"I'm always pale, Christian." I back away from him and start pacing the large office. I let out a small laugh thinking about my first time here. "Remember when I first showed up in your office? Falling into your world." I look at him and smile.

"How could I ever forget? That day changed my life." He walks towards me with his hands behind his back. I catch myself gawking at him, wanting to jump and rip his clothes off here and now. I pull my eyes away.

"So many things can be life-changing," I mutter and walk over to one of the large windows, looking down to the city below. Christian's castle in the sky is like no other. The view from here is equally as beautiful as the view from Escala.

"I agree," he says, looking a bit confused. I want to so badly scream 'I'M PREGNANT' to just rip the bandaid off. I look back at him and he has his head cocked to the side. I turn and walk over to his desk; to his throne. I look at the black chairs on the other side and wonder how many people have squirmed sitting there under his cold gaze.

"How about I order us some lunch?" he asks.

"I am not really hungry." Honestly, food is the last thing I can think about, especially after having to force breakfast down. "I had a big breakfast," I lie.

"Well here, come sit down with me." He walks over to a long white leather couch on the side of the office. As he sits down in the corner he undoes his button, allowing his suit jacket to open and expose his crisp, white dress shirt. I walk over and sit down a cushion away. I remove my shoes and swing my legs up to place my feet on his legs. His hand engulfs my ankle and slowly slides up my calf. I lean my head on hand, my elbow propped on the low back of the couch. He reaches the hem of my skirt and plays with the fabric.

"So you missed me?" His eyes flicker to mine for a moment and then back down to my leg.

"Is that a crime?" I sarcastically tease back. He looks up at me with such warm gray eyes that my heart stops for a second.

"I didn't want to leave this morning, but this is a nice surprise. I missed you." He reaches his other hand over and caresses my cheek. In a split second, he is pushing me back into the couch and kissing me passionately. With his weight pinning me to the couch, his hand on my leg travels in between the thin fabric of my underwear and my skin. I gasp against his lips as his fingers tease me. I put my hand on his chest and push him an inch away from me to catch a breath.

"Here? Now?" I whisper. My eyes look at the locked, solid wood doors of his office.

"No one can hear us. I want you." He looks almost sad. Could being only separated for a few hours drive us even closer? It's almost like a spark reigniting into a flame inside my chest.

We are quick but nothing about it feels quick. His touch lingers on my skin and my legs are jello. I crave more of his touch even after I redress. He watches me with a smug smile from the edge of his desk. I feel myself blush when I catch his eyes.

"Another first, Miss Steele." He uncrossed his arms and walks over to me as I finish putting on my sandals. He embraces me in his arms and kisses my lips softly and then tucks a few loose strands of hair behind my ears.

"Mr. Grey, your appointment for 11:30 is here. Would you like me to reschedule?" Andrea's voice says through his phone on the desk. He rolls his eyes.

"Can we continue this tonight?" He frowns. "I have to take this meeting."

"Yeah." I place my hands on his chest lightly. "I wasn't expecting to stay, anyway." He places a kiss on my cheek and then travels down to my neck. My whole body tingles under his touch, I close my eyes and take a deep breath through my nose. His cologne is musky but sweet. My eyes snap open as his kisses come to a stop.

"I can never get enough of you." He smiles. He lets go of me and walks over to the phone and talks through the intercom. "Send him to room 14."

I stare at Christian from across the office.

"I love you, Christian." I feel the urge to tell him that. He looks up at me and arches an eyebrow. He walks around his desk and stands in front of me.

"As I love you, baby. Come, I will walk you out," he says and places his hand on my back. I feel like everyone in the lobby outside his office knows what we did. Was I quiet enough? I feel embarrassed but at the same time proud. Christian is a catch and I feel honored to be marrying him. However, part of me still finds the idea of sex taboo and private. We reach the elevator and he plants one more big kiss on my lips. He doesn't care who is watching at any given point. He is just proud I'm his. I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him in and kiss him even harder. He responds by slightly biting my bottom lip. It causes me to quickly pull away.

"Laters, baby." The elevator pings open.

"Laters." I smile at him, getting in. I feel like it's the first day all over again. My heart is beating just as fast, the magic between us making me want to jump into his arms. His attire straight from the top line stores. His smile that makes my knees feel weak. The door shuts and reality hits me in the face like a ton of bricks. I look down at my stomach and place my hand there.

"What am I going to do tiny baby?" I whisper. I need to find a way to tell him and quickly.

 **Edited By: dontcare89**


	28. Chapter 28

**Hello again readers! So happy to post another chapter for you!**  
 **This one is long and took alot of thought.**  
 **I hope you enjoy it.**

 **Like always, thank you to my wonderful beta dontcare89!**

* * *

I cannot concentrate. To pass the time I've tried watching the news, taking a bath, calling Kate just to chat, and I even looking up wedding ideas online. I started to google things about pregnancy but slammed the laptop shut. When I look back at the clock, it is only just after 6 and Christian will be home any minute. I turn on the tv and wait patiently on the couch for the elevator to ring.

After a few minutes, thankfully, because there was nothing on TV, the doors open. I can't help but smile every time I lay my eyes on him. I get up from the couch and run to him. His briefcase drops with a loud clunk on the floor just in time for him to catch me. He embraces me tightly, washing away all my worries.

"I've missed you," I sigh into his ear.

"I can tell," he chuckles. "I missed you, too." I pull away but hold his head in my hands.

"How was the rest of your work day?" I smile at him.

"Not nearly as exciting as your visit." He smirks at me as his glorious eyes light up with the memory of our quickie in his office. "I have a surprise for you."

"Oh?" I tilt my head at him. Can't be nearly as surprising as what I'm going to have to tell him.

"I have a business meeting I need to attend and I want you to come with me." My hands drop from his face and I arch an eyebrow at him. How is that a surprise?

"Ohhhh?" This 'oh' more defined than the last one.

"It's in Paris," he reveals with a grin. My eyes widen. I have never been to Paris before; only through the eyes of characters in books.

"Paris! We are really going to Paris?"

"Yes, baby. We have to leave tonight in order to make it there on time." He glances down at his watch. I back away from him.

"That doesn't leave much time to pack." I tilt my head and place my hands on my hips.

"Don't worry about that. I have it all taken care of." I resist the urge to roll my eyes. Of course he had it all taken care of; he plans ahead like he sees the future. "I look forward to taking you away… again," he chuckles.

"How long are we going for?"

"We will be there for a few days. Don't worry, we can always go back. We have all the time in the world together." He reaches up and caresses my cheek. I smile into his hand and kiss his palm,holding his hand in place with mine. I look at him and all I can feel is love. I can't believe I get to marry this man. I involuntarily let out a hard yawn when I'm suddenly overwhelmed with the feeling of exhaustion. "I need to shower and change, you have time to take a nap. I will wake you up when we need to leave."

He leans down and kisses my free cheek then leaves me standing in the foyer, alone. I wait till he is in the bedroom before I look down and caress my stomach.

"Looks like we are going to Paris, baby," I whisper. I turn and make my way to the bed for a nap. I am so tired I don't even remember lying down before everything goes black.

* * *

We arrive at his private jet just after 9 PM. This one is much larger than the last one we were on. I quickly glance at him with the idea he owns more than one.

"Is this one yours too?" As if the giant 'G' in the side didn't make it obvious.

He nods his head at me. Once aboard, I marvel at the fine detail of the interior. Dark wood encases the floor and walls with lush tan, leather seats, embroidered with large, gold 'G''s. When I get to a seat, I run my fingers over the fine letters, thinking one day the 'G' will represent me as well.

"Come sit, baby, we need to take off." He places his hand along my back and leads me to a seat. He doesn't waste time making sure my buckle is tight and secure. "I will be right back. Just need to give strict instructions to the pilots about an upcoming storm." He smiles at me and leaves the cabin towards the front. He is back in only a minute with a disappointed look on his face.

"What's wrong?" I ask as he sits down and buckles in next to me.

"Looks like we will have to fly through it." He shakes his head and runs his fingers through his hair. He looks over at me and places his hand on my lap, cupping both my hands in his. I lean my head on his shoulder and close my eyes as the engines roar to life. He kisses the top of my head.

My mind quickly flicks to the secret I am holding in and how I just want to blurt it out. I keep thinking maybe this flight is the perfect time. He can't run or hide from me. I also need to keep reminding myself that I didn't do this on my own: he clearly knew the consequences of us being reckless and spontaneous. I look up at him through my eyelashes. He is looking out the window, his chin in his one hand. He looks so distant and deep in thought that his face is hard as stone. His eyes break from the window when he looks down at me and smiles.

"What?" he chuckles.

"Nothing. Just admiring how handsome you look when you are deep in thought." I smile at him.

"Well, Miss Steele, I plan to be deep in something soon." His response startles me but also makes me whole face turn red. I break eye contact and look down. I try to hide my reaction but his chuckle lets me know he's clearly seen it. Suddenly, my whole gut turns with desire and I want to jump from my seat and onto his lap at this second. I resist the urge since we are still in seatbelt mode.

"How many planes do you have?" I ask to help myself calm down as I look around the cabin.

"Including this one; three." I look back at him in awe.

"Who needs three private jets?" He shrugs his shoulders at me.

"Me." His eyes say it all. This man has everything he could want and more. He has more than he will ever need yet his disregard for money still startles me.

The attendant tells us we are safe to take our seat belts off. She is a tall blonde, very pretty and well put together, down to her perfectly manicured fingernails. She sets down two glasses of wine in front of us and proceeds to the front of the plane.

I go to grab the glass but stop halfway and retract my hand. Christian already gulped down about half his glass and then looks at mine.

"Why didn't you touch your wine?" He gives me a worried look.

"I... uhh..." I look down at my hands and back up at him. "Don't feel well. It must be the flying." He finishes his glass and then eyes me curiously. He stands up and takes off his outer jacket so he is in just his white dress shirt. He reaches out for me to take his hand.

"I'm dying to break in this new plane." My cheeks redden again and my eyes find the ground as I stand and take his hand. His fingers grab my chin and make me look at him. "You blush so easily," he laughs.

Without warning the plane hits a pocket of turbulence and I stumble into his arms. He stays firmly planted in place. I hate how weak my body has suddenly become. He scoops me into his arms and I let out a little squeal. He carries me through the cabin and down a wide hallway. As we pass doors, I see a small room with a table and chairs surrounding it. Business room, perhaps. We pass a bathroom and a small room. He sets me on my feet in front of double doors that he slides open to reveal the master bedroom. I walk in and examine the interior. Inside sits a large, California king bed with cream bedding. The large, gold 'G''s embroidered on the comforter and shams match the leather chairs in the cabin. Everything is pristine and I would expect nothing less from him.

"Did you pick everything out?" I ask and look back at him. He is leaning against the now closed doors with one leg crossed in front of the other as he unbuttons his cuffs slowly.

"I design everything I own." He tilts his head. "Do you see something you want to change?"

"Not at all. It's beautiful." I look over at a wooden desk and the frosted glass doors leading to what I guess is the master bath.

"I think we should talk about something." I look back over to him. He is unbuttoning his shirt now and I lose my train of thought for a second.

"It can wait. Right now all I want to do is get my hands on you." He closes the space between us in three steps and wraps his arms tightly around me. His lips press against mine with need and want. I push any thoughts I'm having to the very back of my mind and escape into this feeling.

He backs me up to the bed till the back of my thighs hit it. It's too high off the ground for me to lean back. Christian reaches down and grabs the back of my legs and lifts me so I can hook my ankles behind him. He never breaks our kiss as he slowly lowers me onto the bed. It's so soft that it feels like I'm laying on a cloud; ironic.

I let myself get lost in his touch, his smell, his tenderness, and affection. I forget all our troubles and worries and just focus on what it feels like to be with him. We embrace each other for what seems like a lifetime, slowly allowing our bodies to come together. I don't think I will ever get tired of this. He makes me feel so alive every time we are together this way and I'm glad he will be the only man I ever let show me this.

I waken to Christian opening a window shade. The bright blue sky shines through, hurting my eyes slightly.

"We are here," he says. He is already dressed and this puts an instant pout on my face.

"How long have I been sleeping?" I ask as I sit-up in bed. I am still naked and the blanket falls from my breasts and Christian's eyes glance over my body and then back to my eyes.

"Nearly nine hours," he says and walks over to sit on the edge of the bed. He places his hand on my forehead, reminding me of when I was a small child trying to stay home from school and my mom would do the forehead check. "Are you feeling okay?" His eyes narrow slightly.

"Mm..." I stretch my arms above my head. "Yeah. Just really tired lately." I can tell he is having trouble believing my answer.

"You slept through the storm. I thought it would have woken anyone up given the turbulence."

"Oh. I didn't feel a thing."

"I can see that. Get dressed... we will be landing soon and I need you buckled in the cabin." He gets up and leaves me in the room alone. I swing out of the bed and go to the bathroom to relieve myself. As soon as my feet hit the tile I feel a sudden bout of nausea overcome me. I make it to the toilet just in time to dry heave a few times. I have nothing in my stomach to throw up. My esophagus already burns from forcing the acid up.

I take a few seconds to breathe deeply in through my nose and out my mouth to clear my head. Once that passes, I get up and brush my teeth, run my fingers through my hair, and quickly dress. I choose a pair of dark blue jeans, a black off-the-shoulder top, and black flats. I throw my hair up in a loose twist around knot and apply some mascara. I try my best to not look so tired but in the mirror I stare at the bags under my eyes. I know my body is lacking nutrition; I can feel it. I feel it in every weak movement I make and I feel it deep in my bones. I decide when I get the chance I have to call Grace and try to figure out a way to keep food down. I have definitely lost some weight as my jeans are slightly loose.

A knock comes on the bathroom door. "Ana, you must come sit." I look at my image for a split second longer and turn to open the frosted glass doors.

"I'm coming." I give him a weak smile. He reaches up and his thumb traces the dark blue shadow under my eye. He lets out a deep sigh. "Come." He takes my hand and we head for the cabin.

Our hotel room takes up the whole top floor of the hotel. The balcony leads to an eye opening view of the Eiffel Tower. The sun is just setting over the buildings, covering the horizon. The city is lit in an orange glow that reflects off the buildings' windows. I stand there and watch the sky slowly turn from orange to a dark red. It all simply takes my breath away. The smell of the city is so different from home. It smells like fresh flowers and baked goods. I look back over my shoulder through the glass and watch Christian pace the apartment on his phone. I turn my attention back to the setting sun. The tower sparkles with lights that are too dim yet to see their full beauty.

It's more beautiful than any book could have described and any picture could show. I hear the sliding glass door open behind me but don't turn, I just close my eyes and wait for his touch. His arms wrap around me waist and his nose nuzzles in the crook of my neck. His hands lay cupped together in front of my stomach and for a second I picture what it will be like when I have a swollen belly and his hands on it. Caressing our baby and enjoying this new life we are bringing into the world together. I squirm out of his hands and turn to look at him.

He looks puzzled for a second. "Is it everything you thought it would be?" he asks, glancing behind me and then back.

"It's more than what I expected. I want to explore it all." I smile at him. "Who was on the phone?" He frowns. I can tell he doesn't want to talk about it but I need to make small talk.

"A doctor taking care of Elena. She is not showing any signs of improvement but her husband won't pull the plug on her life support. He still holds hope." He shrugs.

"Would you?"

"Would I what? Take her off life support? Yes."

"I mean for me, would you?" I ask. We never had this talk and honestly it's the last thing I want to talk about. Elena is so far in the back of my mind I have simply wanted to act like she doesn't exist.

"Anastasia." He frowns and pulls me into his arms tightly. "I would never give up hope," he whispers into my ear quietly and gives me another squeeze. I smile slightly, knowing he would do everything in his power if something happened to me, as I would for him.. He pulls away. "Let's eat. You haven't eaten anything all day."

I suddenly realize how hungry I truly am.

"Can we just eat in tonight, though? I'm still not feeling too well."

"Anything you want." He takes my hand and we go inside. The penthouse has multiple rooms that I will never get to see. It's bigger than Escala and all the gold finishes around the walls and small knick knacks makes me slightly uncomfortable as I am still not used to this lifestyle.

I convince him to let us eat together on the couch in front of the fireplace, snuggled together, watching the flames dance. It reminds me of eating with Kate; we were never too keen on using a table. After we finish dinner he turns to me and stares.

"What?" I ask after taking a sip of my sparkling water.

"You seem different." When he says this my stomach suddenly drops.

"Different how?" I ask.

"I can't explain it. You just seem more quiet than usual." I have a hard time keeping eye contact with him so I look down at my glass and run my fingers along the rim.

"Well someone tried killing me and I guess I have a lot going on in my mind lately." I look up at him.

"You know nothing will ever come between us. No one can hurt you in any way. I simply won't allow it." He takes my hand.

"I know, Christian. I just..." I look for the right words. "Feel overwhelmed."

"Is it the wedding?" He looks sad suddenly.

"No, oh, no. I want to marry you this fall. I have even been looking at stuff online. I just have a lot to think about and to plan. That's probably why I am so distracted." He raises an eyebrow at me.

"Anything I can do to help?" he questions.

"Just show up." I giggle, feeling light all of the sudden.

"Oh, Miss. Steele. Nothing will stop me from being there." He takes the glass out of my hand and sets it on the table. He grabs along the nape of my neck and pulls my lips to his. The taste of sweet red wine lines his lips and tongue. I close my eyes and take in his passionate kiss. He lowers me to the couch till he is on top of me. He breaks from the kiss too soon and looks down at me.

"Maybe getting a wedding planner would help." I smirk.

"I thought you would never ask. Taking on a task that size would be quite an accomplishment. I will call George in the morning. He is the top wedding planner is the world right now.."

"How would you know that?" I cock my head to the side, though I am not surprised that he has that useless information in his head.

"Just waiting for you to ask, that's all." He leans down and deepens his kiss.

* * *

I slowly open my eyes to the soft glow of the sun coming through the deep blue curtains. I sit straight up in bed, confused on where I am. It takes a second to click that I am in Paris with Christian and not home at Escala. I slowly lay back down and roll over on my side to find a neatly-written note on Christian's pillow, along with a white rose. I grab them and roll onto my back so I can hold the paper above my head to read.

'I have a meeting this morning. I didn't want to wake you since you looked so beautiful as you slept. Will be home soon. Laters, baby.' I smile, dropping the note to my chest. I bring the rose up to my nose. It smells wonderful and fresh like the city down below. The petals' soft texture against my skin is soothing. I decide it's useless to get up now, so instead I lie there for a few minutes before dozing back off to sleep.

When I finally open my eyes, it's past ten and Christian is still not home from his meeting yet. I finally have a morning where I don't feel like vomiting the moment my feet hit the floor. I take a shower and embrace the feeling of normalcy again. When I get out, I dress in a dark blue, spaghetti-strapped sundress that was packed in my luggage. I pair it with matching flats and leave my hair down in loose curls over my shoulders and down my back. I look in the mirror to observe my outfit but I can't help but trail my eyes down to my stomach. Currently, I still look normal, but soon there will be something there that wasn't before and the thought scares me.

I hear the penthouse door open and I make my way to the living room to see Christian and Taylor walk in. His eyes search for me instantly and when they meet, he smiles from ear to ear. I'm standing in the doorway of our room, waiting for him to come to me. He slowly cocks his head to the side in thought. He walks over to me in his crisp dark blue suit that matches the dress I decided on. When he gets to me I take his hand and pull him into the room shutting the door behind him. I grab his face and kiss him harder than I have in a long while. His soft lips molding against mine with his hands wrapped around my back, pulling me flush against his body. I break away from our kiss, trying to take in as much air as I can.

"Hi," He pants, trying to catch his breath as well.

"Hi." I smile at him.

"You seem much better today." His smile back makes my knees weak. I smile wider.

"I feel better."

"How about we go explore a little. I have time before my next meeting." He brushes a piece of hair from my face that has fallen forward.

"I would like that." I give him another swift kiss and proceed to leave the room.

We leave the penthouse hand in hand with Taylor and Sawyer in front of us. I don't feel like we need security here and that it almost draws more attention to us in a place where no one knows who we are.

I peek up at Christian and the thought dawns on me that no matter where we go that his looks will always attract unwanted attention. He looks down at me and I feel almost embarrassed that he caught me gawking at him. I wonder if that will ever fade: my fascination with how incredibly handsome he is and how he doesn't even flaunt it.

"Where would you like to go first?" He smiles at me.

"I have never been here before. I am sure you know some good spots to sightsee." I break eye contact and stare forward. My immature mind thinks of who he could have came with before. Maybe he brought a sub with him or even Elena. I tuck some hair behind my ear and try to hide my face.

The next few hours we do many things that I have only dreamed of doing. Walking down the streets of Paris with Christian made me forget everything that has happened in the past few weeks.

We decide to take a stroll in a nearby park. The trees sway in the light warm breeze.

"It's really beautiful here." I gaze up at him.

"It is indeed. We can come here whenever you'd like." His smile warms my heart.

"Hmm." I just hum through my lips. I take the time to look around at all the people walking past us. Some turn their head at Christian but most just keep on their going. Paris is filled with beautiful people. He fits in here.

"Are you ready to grab an early dinner? I have to be at my next meeting soon," he laments. I don't want to leave the park we are in. It's peaceful and elegant; nothing like the public parks back home.

"Sure," I say not even looking up at him. I keep looking at the trees and listening to the birds sing. I wrap my arm around his arm and lay my head against his shoulder. He kisses the top of my head as we make our way back to the car.

We reach an adorable restaurant that has beautiful views of the Eiffel Tower. The hostess leads us to a quiet section of the balcony outside on the top floor. It's very private and away from the crowded inside area. I glance around the city, examining the beauty that surrounds us.

"It's wonderful," I say to Christian as we sit down.

"It is, isn't it?" He responds and looks out at the city as well. I can't help but stare at Christian and smile. Today has been perfect with him; getting to see parts of Paris with him that I have only read about. He looks at me and I feel the blood rise to my cheeks. I shyly brush some hair behind my ear and look away.

"Did you enjoy yourself today?" he asks. He reaches across the table and grabs my hand, rubbing his thumb lightly over my knuckles. I look back to his eyes and the softness of his face.

"More than anything. It was extraordinary; thank you." He grins at my words.

"I hope to show you extraordinary things for the rest of your life." He gives my hand a light squeeze. Instantly my stomach drops. I should tell him right now about the baby. His mood is so light that I can't see this going bad.

A waitress appears from beside us.

"Can I start you out with something to drink, Sir? Ma'am?" She looks flustered and I raise my eyebrow at Christian. His smile makes even me go weak. He knows he has an affect on women and it amuses him.

"Two glasses of your top red wine," he responds to her. She nods at him.

"Actually, I will just have a water. Thank you." I smile at her, but from the corner of my eye I see Christian's disapproving look.

"I will be right back with those for you." She flashes her teeth in a friendly smile and then leaves.

"Hmm." He takes his hand off of mine and sits back in his chair. He crosses his leg so his ankle is resting on his knee. He rubs his chin and just stares at me.

"What?" I tilt my head at him. "Can't a girl just want some water?"

"Why don't you want wine, lately? Especially here, in Paris?" he asks and I have to think about my answer for a second. I have to come up with some logical explanation.

"I haven't been craving it lately. That's all." As soon as it leaves my mouth I want to facepalm myself. Such a stupid answer and not a very convincing one at that.

"Mhm." He hums while staring at me with slightly narrowed eyes. I can tell that wasn't because he agrees with me.

The waitress comes back with our drinks and Christian orders two steaks, medium rare, with steamed vegetables. My mouth waters instantly.

"I have been thinking," he then says after a moment of silence.

"Well, I would be afraid if you haven't." I giggle and I see his mood shift a little towards the lighter side. He smirks.

"Always with your smart mouth, Miss Steele." He then removes his ankle from his knee and sits closer to the table. "I want to travel a bit after the wedding; show you some more major cities." He motions to the city around us. "There are even more spectacular places than here. Athens, Barcelona, Rome, Sydney. We could take a year seeing it all together."

My heart sinks.

"Travel for a whole year?" I feel my face drain of color and can tell my reaction startles him. I rub my now sweaty palms together under the table. I reach up and take a sip of my water. My hand is shaking and I try my best to steady it but he notices my change in body language.

"Anastasia?"

"You want to travel around the world?" I start to sink lower into my chair.

"Yes. I see how much you enjoy seeing the city and exploring. I feel guilty we can't stay here long due to my work. I want to take you to see everything your heart desires."

"I... I..." I am at lost for words.

"Don't be nervous, baby. We can always take trips back to visit family."

"That's not it."

The waitress comes back with our food and I'm grateful. I am starving but I also hope this shuts Christian up for a few minutes so that I can think. I cut into my steak and take a bite right away. He doesn't touch his food; instead he stares at me with burning eyes.

"Then what is it?" He asks while I have a mouthful of food. I stop chewing for a second and look at him. I bite down a few more times and swallow my much too large piece of meat.

"I don't think we will be able to do that. You have work and you know..." I quickly say before putting another piece in my mouth. I am starving and the food tastes delightful.

"I own my company. I can do whatever I want," he smirks. I swallow my food and set my fork down. "So what is it? You don't want to travel with me?"

"Don't be silly, Christian, of course I want to travel with you. I am just saying that..." I take a deep breath. "Now is not the right time."

"And why is that?" My stomach is about to jump out of my mouth from nervousness with every word he speaks.

"Because I'm pregnant." As soon as the words leave my mouth I want to take them back. I want to believe I just thought it and not really said that out loud. It's almost like everything around us has frozen. I can't look up at Christian, afraid to see the look on his face.

After a moment, I finally look up through my eyelashes and his expression tells me everything. Anger swells across his face, his hands in balls on the table and his breathing is deep. I pick my head fully up to look right into his eyes.

"Say that again," his cold tone commands.

"I'm pregnant." I feel like sinking through this chair right to the ground level; out of his view and out of such a public place. His eyes have glazed over with a cold look. His once icy gray eyes are now a dark storm.

"Impossible," he growls.

"Umm, not impossible." I say back with a nervous chuckle.

"This is funny to you?" He sits straight up and I cower a little. "Is ruining my life some joke?"

His words sting me like a swarm of bees; my heart shattering into a million pieces. It feels like the hole in my chest has reopened from the time we spent the year apart.

"No," I respond quietly. With a sudden movement of his arm he swiftly clears the table. All the food and drinks go crashing to the ground. I jump in my chair pushing my back flat against the seat. My hands shoot to protect my stomach instinctively.

"I don't want a baby. I don't want to have anything to do with that life. Did you do this on purpose?" He points at my stomach. His voice sends a cold chill down my spine. I go to open my mouth but he interrupts anything I was about to say. "This is going to ruin my life. A fucking baby?" He shakes his head and runs his hand through his hair. I glance at the delicious food now scattered on the balcony ground.

"Christian, calm down. We can talk about this."

"I will not calm down!" He stands up and braces himself on the table. He leans his body over the table to be closer to me. "I don't want this." His eyes glare with hate. Tears start to fall down my face and land on my dress. "Don't start with me, Ana. You knew damn well getting pregnant would fuck everything up."

With that he turns on his heels and proceeds to walk away. I instantly lower my head onto my crossed arms on the table, crying harder than I have in a long time.

The only thing that stops me is when I hear footsteps behind me. I sit up, thinking it's going to be Christian coming back. I am disappointed to see Sawyer. He stern face gives nothing away.

"I am to take you back to the penthouse, Miss Steele. Please come with me." He stands with his hands behind his back.

"He left?" I gawk at Sawyer. He just nods. which doesn't give much away. I slowly stand up and head for the exit.

What just happened? Did he break up with me?

He helps me to my feet and takes me through the restaurant with his hand around my back. I feel almost better till I realize how many eyes are on me. The girl crying so hard her eyes are swollen with a nose redder than the roses on the tables. I look like a fool and embarrassment swallows me.

* * *

When we get back to the penthouse, I walk directly to the bedroom and shut the door. I throw myself on the bed and cry hard into a pillow that smells of Christian. I hold it tight to my chest and the conversation flashes rough my mind over and over. He doesn't want this. He doesn't want me, then, obviously.

I have to leave.

I grab my purse from the couch and look around the penthouse for where Sawyer could possibly be hiding. I don't see him anywhere and I take the opportunity to make a dash for it. I press the elevator button waiting for the doors to open. My shaking hands splayed on my stomach. I knew this would happen. I knew he would take this harder than I did. I lower my head and close my eyes till I hear the doors slowly open. It seems that everything is moving in slow motion. I press the code door button over and over till they are tightly shut. I might have escaped Sawyer for some time but it won't be long till they realize I am not in the penthouse and he alerts Christian at his meeting.

I don't care, though. He had no right to make me feel like I did this. Even if it was out of anger or fear, I don't want to be anywhere near him right now. I don't want to be near anything that has to do with him. I make it to the lobby and speed walk my way to the doors, pushing past people without a care in the world of what people might think of how rude I seem. I just need to breathe. Outside, the air fills my nose with the scent of roses and it sends a calming sensation through my bones but not enough to make me turn around. I stand on the curb, trying to flag down a taxi. It doesn't take one long to pull over in front of me and I climb in so fast I almost stumble into the car.

"Where to, Madam?" The cab driver asks. He has tanned skin with dark black hair. An attractive man for his age; he is probably in his mid 50's.

"The airport, please," I say quickly. I definitely look like a runaway damsel in distress with the way sweat is quickly forming on my hairline. I feel a bead of it run down my cheek and I quickly brush it away.

"Yes, Madam," he replies and pulls away from the curb. I have an initial feeling that I want to cry but the adrenaline running through my body is stopping that from happening. I sit there in the back of this dingy cab by myself and place my hand over my nonexistent belly. I think to myself that running away could lead to being a single mom, raising a child that wasn't wanted by their father. No child should have to go through life like that. Would he find a new submissive to take his anger out on? Would he forget all about us and move on?

The thought are overwhelming so I try to stare out the window at scenery to take my mind off of it. My eyes keep catching young children and their parents. They look happy, smiling and playing together like a real family. The whole life Christian and I were going to have together is no more. It was never about the money or the expensive lifestyle he lived. I love him with my whole heart and more; I loved him with every ounce of my being and he stomped on my soul without even a care.

I take my phone out and do the only thing I can think of right now; call my mom. It rings three times before she picks up.

"Ana!" she squeals.

"Hi, Mom." I choke back the hurt in my voice but as my mom, I know she can tell it's not right

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" Her voice is soothing and exactly what I needed.

"Can I come home?" I ask. I have no doubt she will take me back with open arms but not without a list of questions.

"Oh, absolutely you can come home. My door is always open. What's going on? Is everything with Christian okay?"

"Honestly, no. I just want to come home. I can explain everything there. Not over the phone." I hear her let out a long sigh. No doubt her mind will be running as fast as mine till I get there.

"When will you be arriving?" she asks.

"I need to book a flight. I am on my way to the airport right now but I won't be there for a while. I'm in Paris."

"Paris!" she yells.

"Yeah, I sort of came here with Christian for a meeting he has but things just took a bad turn and I want to leave. I will text you when I board." I can swear I hear her sobbing on the phone but she doesn't know it.

"Okay, sweetheart. See you soon. Love you."

"I love you too, Mom," I choke back. I press 'end' and throw my phone in my purse and zip it shut.

I close my eyes and lean my head back. I try to clear my mind and think about how long it will be before they realize I am gone. Suddenly, my phones starts to ring and my heart sinks. I snap open my eyes and rummage through my purse to find it. Why am I not shocked to see Christian's name. I press ignore and put my phone face down on my lap.

I look up and the taxi driver is looking at me through his rearview mirror. He catches me make eye contact with him.

"Is everything alright, Madam?" he asks politely.

"Yes, thank you," I lie. My phone rings again and I look down to see Christian's name once more. I take a deep breath and press ignore. Within seconds he is calling again. If I don't answer, he will just keep calling until I do.

"Christian."

"Where the fuck are you?" He belts out, startling me, though I am not surprised he is mad.

"Leaving." Is all I say.

"Get back to the penthouse right this second. This is not a request; it is an order." I can almost feel the steam coming from his ears.

"No, you made it very clear this isn't what you want. I won't bother you again. Goodbye, Christian," I say and click 'end'. I power my phone off this time so he can't call back or use his FBI skills to track me. I throw it back into my purse and pull out my wallet. I count out the money I have and wonder if it is enough for a one way ticket to Georgia and for the taxi ride. I stuff everything back in my purse as I see the airport sign ahead.

When we reach the curb, the gentlemen tells me it's 65 US Dollars. I count out my money and give it to him. I rush out of the car so fast I don't think I remembered to shut the door. At this point. I really don't care.

Since I don't have any luggage, I am hoping I can board fast and get out of here. When I get inside the vast building, I am instantly lost. There are people going in every direction and I look for a sign for the check-in desk but most of the signs are in French. I take a second to compose myself and take a closer look. In the distance I see a line of people in front of a long desk and decide to try that first. I find the shortest line and wait impatiently for my turn. It seems to last forever and I know every second that passes is a second longer I am stuck in this city with Christian.

I finally get to the desk.

"How may I help you today, Ma'am?" the older lady asks.

"One way ticket to Atlanta, Georgia, USA. Please." The woman looks down at her computer and types some information in. She looks curiously up at me a few times.

"One way ticket to Atlanta, Georgia is $598." I think for a moment if I have that type of money in my wallet. If I use my card, no doubt Christian will find me in a heartbeat. As I weigh my thoughts, I can tell the woman is getting impatient and the person behind me clears their throat. I pull out my wallet and passport to quickly count my cash. I don't have nearly enough. I find my mom's credit card that isn't linked to my account and use that to purchase the ticket. My mom always said I could use it in an emergency and this clarifies as one. I don't think he has knowledge of that card so I should be clear. The lady finishes my transaction and hands me back my passport with my card. She smiles at me with a concerned look in her eyes.

"Gate 48; takes off in 35 minutes. You better hurry if you want to catch your flight, but since you don't have luggage, I assume you should make it. Any problems, come back here." I don't even say anything back as I make a run for the gate. Security is another story. I get to the scanner and the officer is insistent that I walk through three times.

"Is there a problem, Sir?" I irritably ask.

"Do you only have your purse with you?" He cocks his head to the side. He takes a long moment to scan his eyes down my body, quickly making me uneasy.

"Yes. It was last moment and I am only going one way. I am in a rush." He takes a step closer to me as I speak.

"You traveling alone?" This time when he talks he is much too close for comfort and I take a step back.

"Yes." I squint my eyes at him.

"Hmm. Walk through one more time. I need to make sure you are not hiding anything under your dress." I gasp when he speaks through his thick French accent. My dress is short and tight; if I was hiding anything you would see it.

"Okay." I step through one more time and look back at him over my shoulder. When I do his eyes are locked on my butt. He looks down my legs and back up till our eyes meet. My hands cross over my chest and I feel violated without even being touched.

"You are good to go," he finally says. I grab my purse and walk at such a pace I think I might trip over my own two feet.

My gate is on the other side of the building. I make it with five minutes to spare, just enough time to catch my breath. I look around the room to all the people sitting in the chairs waiting to board just as I am. Couples young and old; children; a group of school girls in uniforms who look like they are going on a tripe or leaving from one; and an old man sitting in the corner, reading the paper. I wrap my arms around myself as I feel my adrenaline finally starting to drop and the cold sweats kicking in. My knees feel weak and my heart is still racing as if I just ran a marathon. I want nothing more than to be under the covers back at the penthouse with a warm sweater and a cup of tea. Tears form in the corners of my eyes and I realize the moment I step on this plane I can never look back. Christian doesn't want this life together, anymore. That is clear.

It's almost like the air is sucked out of the room when I realize that the school girls are staring at me. All of them are huddled together in the corner with eyes locked in my direction. One of the girls whispers to the one next to her and her mouth drops open. I look down at my dress and shoes wondering if I have something on them. My face must look like a clown from all my crying. I try to hide it with my hair.

A flight attendant walks out and announces we can now start boarding. I take a step forward but someone grabs my wrist, tight.

"Ouch," I squeal before spinning around to see an angry face. I gasp, "Christian."

 **edited by: dontcare89**

* * *

 **Some of you will be angry at how this leave a sour taste in your mouth.  
Remember there is another chapter coming this week!**  
 **It is already typed but I want to let this one sink in first.**  
 **I wanted to keep this as genuine as my heart felt and what kind**  
 **of author would I be if I did not follow my heart.**  
 **As my beta pointed out to me, as I struggled with his reaction, that**  
 **if I didn't do what felt right to me... I wouldn't believe in my own writing.**

 **Thank you all for reading and I look forward to you thoughts!**


	29. Chapter 29

**This is not an update!**

 **Hi readers! I know you are waiting for an update and I am so sorry it has taken so long. Sorry for the delay, the past week and half have been troubling for me. Last Monday my grandma was put in hospice and passed. I have been overwhelmed with grief as her and I were so close.**

 **I had wrote the new chapter and it was edited by my beta but then I has decided it was not the way I wanted it to go so I had started to rewrite it but then life got in the way. So i am currently working on it and will send it out to her in the next day or two. I will try to have it to you at the end of the week.**

 **I apologize so much for the delay! I feel awful as so many of you are wonderful and have asked me so kindly about it! Thank you to all my follwers, you are all truly my inspiration to keep going, I know that what my Grandma would of wanted me to do.**

 **Please hold on, it will be up soon!  
I love you all.**

 **-A**


	30. Chapter 30

**Hi Everyone,**  
 **First thing first, thank you all from the bottom of my heart.**  
 **You have all had the sweetest words, encouraging posts, and prayers for me.**  
 **When I lost my grandma back in late October, I really shut myself down.**  
 **But I wouldn't of been able to keep going without the constant love I recived from y'all.**

 **So a big THANK YOU xoxo.**

 **Finally Chapter 29!**  
 **Always, thanks to my amazing and lovely beta, dontcare89.**  
 **She is absolutely amazing. Go check her out!**

 **Chapter Song**  
 **Tell Me You Love Me- Demi Lovato**

* * *

"Anastasia." His winded breath lets out. His eyes are wide and staring deep into mine.

"Christian, what are you doing here?" I gasp. His hold on my wrist is so tight it hurts. I try to ignore it while staring back into his eyes. Suddenly I realize it looks as if he has been crying. Small beads of sweat stain his forehead. "Let go of me. I'm leaving." I tug at my small wrist in his large hand.

"Where the fuck do you think you are going?" He demands an answer. His voice low but firm. His breathing is ragged as he is trying to catch his breath. His eyes flicker around us but then lock back on mine. I notice Taylor is not far behind him and winded also.

"Anywhere but here," I answer. I'm both surprised and not surprised that he managed to find me. "How did you..."

"You were just going to run away?" He looks around. "We are in a different country, Anastasia. Anything could have happened to you. Do you understand how stupid that is?"

"You think something is going to happen to me home at Escala, too." I roll my eyes, very well knowing it will set something off in him. He tenses up and his eyes become glossed over with a cold demeanor. I realize he is in dominant mode and it frightens me.

"This is different, Anastasia." His voice sends chills down my spine.

"What are you going to do? Spank me? Right here in this airport?" I squint my eyes at him, the sarcastic tone in my voice sending him over the edge. He leans forward, putting his lips close to my ear.

"Don't tempt me." My heart stops. He pulls away and coldness radiates off him.

"With all things considered, I think it's best I leave."

"I am not letting you. Besides, you think I am going to let you and our child on a commercial airline?" he growls. "You think I am going to let you just get on a plane?" He oddly chuckles.

"You wouldn't have had a choice if I had gotten on that plane in time. I'm not your submissive, Christian. I can do what I want."

"That isn't what I meant, Ana."

"Well you made it clear it was my problem now. So you shouldn't care." I pout in frustration.

"Are you insane?"

People bustle past us, making their way to the plane. I look over as one of the school girls is still drooling over Christian; even in his panicked state you can't deny his looks. I glance back at him and keep my voice low.

"I was insane to think you would take the news better. I didn't do this on my own," I snap. I place my free hand over my stomach and look down. "It's a child, Christian. Not some business deal you can deny." I look up at him and his eyes linger on my stomach for a moment longer than mine. He brings his eyes back up.

"He or she was made out of love. Well at least that's what I think." I pause and then correct myself. "What I thought. I was wrong to even coincider you accepting this with an open mind."

"Anastasia..." he whispers.

"Well it isn't just me leaving you this time. I am going to miss my flight. Let go."

"How do you think I felt when I got a call you left the penthouse. I rushed out of my meeting and had to find you. When you said goodbye on the phone I... I... I..." he closes his eyes and shakes his head. "I thought you were going to do something reckless." When he opens his eyes, they are screaming with anger and hurt.

"You had no problem leaving me on that rooftop. Don't be so childish, Christian. I am an adult."

"Last boarding call," an attendant says over the loudspeaker. "Door closes in five minutes."

"I need to board," I say and try to pull my hand away but his hand tightens.

"You are not getting on that flight," he says through his teeth.

"Yes, I am." I once again try to pull my hand away. "This is why I didn't tell you right away; I was scared. Scared of the truth and mostly scared of your reaction. Now I know I had every right to be."

"Did you think I would be happy about this?" He growls.

"I had hopes you would be because it's OUR child."

"Well you and OUR child are not getting on that flight. End of discussion." He squints his eyes at me. Tears of frustration build up and rest on the edges of my eyes. They are ready to break free and stream along my face. My heart feels empty, as if literally nonexistent right now. I close my eyes tight and lower my head.

"I'm leaving, Christian. I can't do this anymore." I turn a little but he tugs at my arm and pulls me into a tight lock to his body snapping my eyes open. He holds me in place with his hand firm along my back.

He uses his other hand and tilts my head up to look at him. My now free wrist tingles in pain and I wince when I bend it. He takes hold of my chin firmly with his fingers. Without a care in the world of who is watching he slams his lips to mine. Everything in me says to pull away but I don't. He holds me in place as his tongue grazes my teeth and bottom lip. He slowly releases my lips from his and rests his forehead against mine. With only one kiss my heart beats faster, letting me know it is still there despite the open hold I had felt.

"You don't want this," I say. I keep my eyes closed until I feel our foreheads part.

"I didn't mean that. I didn't mean any of that. I am not ready to be a father but I can't lose you. I will need some time to adjust. Anastasia, you are the most important thing to ever exist in my world. I am not letting you walk out of it again. I won't."

Ohh these damn tears of mine. My hormones all out of whack makes it impossible to hold them in anymore.

"You can't put the blame on me. I am just as scared as you are but I would never do what you did. Say all those hurtful things to you. Leaving me there on the balcony alone with what was something to be celebrated or discussed as adults."

He grimaces at my words. "You sprang it on me, Anastasia."

"I..." My words are caught in my throat with the decision weighing heavily on my shoulders. A flight attendant interrupts us and Christian lets go of my chin. He still holds me firmly to him as to make sure I won't run. I use my hands to push myself away from his chest.

"Ma'am, is everything okay here?" She obviously saw me trying to get away from him and this looks like a bad situation. I look over at her and know I have to make a decision now.

"Yes. One moment," I say. The woman nods at me and walks back to the podium. I look back at Christian. "When you decide to be a man..." I pause. "Come find me." With that I turn and walk away. Surprisingly he doesn't follow me. I want to look back but I know my heart will just sink lower into the emptiness of my chest. They close the doors behind me and I let out a long breath I had been holding. I follow the attendant to my seat and I let out all the pain I had been holding in. Tears flow heavily down my cheeks. I let it all out, covering my mouth with my hand to muffle the sobs. Did I make a mistake?

-Two weeks later-

I'm laying in my bed at my mom's house. She has been all over me since I told her about the baby and what happened with Christian. She keeps trying to get me to eat but I just can't. Besides the fact that I just can't keep it down, I emotionally am sick. I have lost some weight from lack of food and throwing up what little does touch my stomach.

A soft knock on the door causes me to sit up in bed. My mother walks in with a glass of water and some vitamins.

"Honey, you have to eat. It's not good for you or the baby." She says as she comes and sits on the end of the bed, holding out the vitamins for me. I take them and then gulp down the glass of cool water.

"I can't, mom." I sniffle.

"Has he called again?" she asks. I see the worry on her face; she is going to get wrinkles if she keeps frowning like that.

"At least three times a day." I roll my eyes.

"Are you ever going to answer?" She then moves closer and pushes some hair behind my ear. "Honey, I know you are upset but you two need to talk." I look down and fiddle with my ring. I can't bring myself to take it off. I don't feel like our relationship is over but I don't know how we are going to fix this. He hurt me.

"I don't know, mom. I honestly don't." I look up to her with puffy eyes. I have been crying all morning, again.

"Well at least let me take you to the doctors to see what we can do about this horrible morning sickness." She tilts her head. "I am worried about you." I give her a small nod. She gets up from the bed and places a small kiss on my forehead. "I will be right back." With that she leaves the room. I lay back down and hug my pillow.

Suddenly my phone starts to ring again. I roll over and grab it off the nightstand with the intention to press ignore, knowing its Christian. To my surprise, its Kate. She has called a few times but I just couldn't bring myself to answer it. I miss her, though. I miss everyone. I decide to answer.

"Hi."

"ANA! Oh my gosh, Ana. Where have you been? Why haven't you been answering my calls?"

"I'm with my mom. Decided to come and see her."

"What is going on between you and Christian?"

Instantly, the hole in my heart opens with the sound of his name from her lips.

"Nothing," I reply quietly.

"Don't you tell me nothing. There is obviously something. He has not been himself since he got back from Paris. Alone, may I add. What happened? You can tell me. Am I not your best friend?"

"You are. I'm just not ready to talk about it, I guess."

"Aww, sweetie."

"I gotta go, Kate. I'll call you later." I hang up before she can say anything. I turn and grab my pillow again. I feel weak and sleepy so much lately. I just want to eat some solid food to get a little bit of energy. My body aches from a broken heart and my stomach aches for food. The door cracks back open and my mom walks in.

"Can you be ready in an hour?"

"Yeah, sure," I say, sitting up in bed.

"Okay, go take a shower. I'll bring in the wash from downstairs so you have some clean clothes. If you are feeling up to it, we can go shopping and get you a few more things."

"Sure." Though I doubt I will have the energy.

As soon as she is gone I make my way into the bathroom. I look in the mirror and don't even recognize the woman in front of me. Bags under her too-large eyes. Hair sticking up all over the place. Chapped lips and pale skin. I instantly turn around and take a deep breath. I decide after my shower to apply some makeup and do my hair. I try to look as normal as possible. I am pleased when I look in the mirror that I somewhat resemble my old self. I walk into the room and pull out the white summer dress from my clean basket.

My mom still had some of my clothes here so I was grateful when I showed up with nothing that she was able to bring my box up for me. When I walk into the kitchen, she does a double take.

"You look better, honey. Come sit, try and eat some fruit before we go." I shake my head at her but she gives me the "mom" look. So I do as she says and suck on some small grapes till its time to leave.

The doctor's office was small and quiet. I'm thankful for that, I didn't think I could take loud noises right now. My head was throbbing.

"Miss. Steele," a nurse calls from a doorway. I stand up and notice my mom doesn't move.

"Go, honey, I can stay here." I nod at her and make my way to the nurse. I follow the middle aged woman down the hall to a small room with yellow walls and a hard exam table.

"Sit here. The doctor will be in shortly." I give her a small smile and she leaves, shutting the door behind her. We are not at an OBGYN, just a small, local doctor. There are no leg rests or bright lights. Just me and the table.

Soon the door opens and an older man with a scruffy beard and slicked back grey hair walks in.

"Good afternoon, Miss. Steele. What brings you in today?" He looks up from his clipboard.

"Oh, well." I pause. "I recently found out I was pregnant and have a hard time keeping anything down." He gives me an "oh" face.

"How far along are you?"

"Honestly, I am not sure. I found out 2 weeks ago and haven't made any plans to go to an OBGYN."

"Why is that?" He stands in front of me and takes his stethoscope from around his neck and places it on my chest. His eyes linger down to my engagement ring.

"I... well... I am not from around here. I came to visit my mom after finding out. I got really sick so I haven't felt well enough to travel back home to see one," I lie. Partially. I take a few deep breaths for him and he puts the stethoscope back around his neck. He then grabs the blood pressure cuff from next to me and proceeds to take my blood pressure. After he is done I notice that his eyebrows crease together.

"Your blood pressure is extremely high." He jogs down some numbers on his clipboard and looks up at me. "I can prescribe something, but it can make you very weak and cause fainting spells. I suggest taking it and then relaxing. You don't want to pass out. This can be very dangerous at these levels. You will needs to see your proper doctor as soon as possible. When do you plan on going home?"

"Umm, I am not sure."

"I see. Well I can prescribe some anti nausea medicine to help with keeping the food down but I suggest going back home within the next week. There is not much more I can do here. We don't see expecting mothers here but your mom is a friend of mine and she asked me for a favor."

"Thanks, doctor. Is that all?" I ask. I just want to get out of here.

"For today. Just make sure to drink lots of fluids." He smiles and writes something on a small slip. He hands me the paper and leaves the room.

I slip off the table and make my way to the waiting room. My mom is in the corner where I left her. She is talking to someone on the phone. As I get closer and sees me and instantly gets off. She looks frantic.

"That was quick."

"Yeah. Everything okay, mom?"

"Yeah. What did the doc say?"

"He gave me a script for some nausea medicine and apparently I have extremely high blood pressure so he gave me a script for that also. Can we go fill it at the closest pharmacy? I'd like to get back home."

"No shopping?" She tilts her head.

"Not today," I answer. She stands up and grabs her purse off the ground. "Who were you talking to?" I look at her. She just looks at me for a second.

"No one," she lies. I cock an eyebrow at her.

"No one, huh?" She just nods.

"Let's go get your prescription." She then hurries out of the waiting room.

We arrive home and I sit in the living room on the couch with a bowl of fruit. The medicine has kicked in a little and I finally feel like I can eat. I start small because I don't want to overdo it. My mom is sitting in the recliner when her phone goes off. She looks down at it and removes herself from the living room. She is being so secretive. My mom walks back into the living room with her purse slung over her shoulder and keys in hand.

"Um, I have a few errands to run. I'll be back later."

"Why are you being so weird?"

"Call me if you need anything." I eye her for a second. "Make sure to relax because that blood pressure bottle says it can make you faint. So no strenuous activities."

"Sure. I think I'm just going to go outside." She nods and leaves. When I hear her car pull out of the driveway I get up and make my way for the backyard. The sun feels so good on my skin. I set my glass of lemonade on the arm of the lounge chair. I close my eyes and tilt my head towards the sky. Today is the first say I have gone outside since getting here and now I'm regretting all the time I spent inside. I sit down and lay there for a while, so long I lose track of time and the air starts to cool. I was letting my body soak in the vitamin D. Lord knows I need it. I'm pastier than that fluffy tire man that remind me of marshmallows. My eyes shoot open. Maybe I can call my mom and she can bring some home. Those sound so good right now. My mouth waters at the thought of popping one into my mouth. I stand up and get out of the chair. I straighten out my white summer maxi dress, fixing the spaghetti strap that fell down my shoulder. When I look up I almost stumble back.

"Christian?" I mouth. The words don't even leave me. Just air. He looks radiant from the sunlight in his dark washed jeans and white t-shirt. His face has days of scruff on it and his hair is tossed as if he has run his fingers through it too many times.

"Anastasia." He takes a step toward me. I instinctively take a step back. My heart racing at the sound of my name coming from his lips.

"What... what... what are you doing here?" I struggle to talk.

"I needed to see you. I have missed you so much." Then it clicks.

"Did my mom call you?" He doesn't respond. From that I got my answer. That is who she was talking to at the doctors office. She planned this.

"Baby, you don't understand how much I worried about you."

"Why?" He takes another step towards me. This time I don't step back.

"You have been sick. Your mom has been keeping me updated, after she scolded me for what I did. I don't blame her. She is protecting her daughter."

"Why are you here?"

"I can't live without you. I messed up. I really messed up. You have been so sick and I couldn't even be there for you. I thought giving you distance was what you needed but I can't give that to you. I need you. I need you to be with me. Be near me. Call me selfish, but I can't be away from you any longer. I will do whatever it takes for you to forgive me for what I did and what I said but please, baby. Please forgive me." He places his hand over his heart. "I need you. I will never forgive myself for what I said to you. It was a dick move."

"Uhh, yeah," I say sarcastically.

"I am so sorry."

"I can't forgive you, Christian. That will take time. You hurt me."

"I know, baby, I know." His eyes water up. He takes another step toward me. He is almost arms length away. His cologne is now starting to fill my nostrils. I close my eyes for a second, inhaling the familiar scent. I snap them back open and look at his face.

"I..." I am lost as to what I should do. "I don't know how to forgive you."

"Just come back with me. Please. I can prove how sorry I am. Anything you want. Anything you need."

"I need time," I respond.

"Well I can't be away from you any longer. I just can't. For two weeks I have sat at my desk forcing myself not to get on a plane right then and come here. Every day hoping you would answer my calls, giving me permission to come get you. Anything. My heart is broken. I fucked up, bad. I hate myself." Tears stream down his face. "I can't live without you. I feel so empty, knowing my pregnant fiancé wants nothing to do with me." He takes another step forward. "I'm so broken." He hesitantly reaches out and touches my face.

Instantly I feel the warmth flow through my body and I lean into his touch, my eyes fluttering shut. Then his whole body is embracing me. His hands sprawl out over my back and his face is in my neck. I don't initially wrap my arms around him, but after a few seconds I do. He feels like home. I missed him. I missed this. I start crying, harder than I have in the past two weeks. My whole body starts to shake from the sobs coming from me. He just pulls me closer.

"You.. broke... me," I say between sobs.

"I know, baby. I am so sorry." I bury my head into his neck and just cry. "I love you so much," he says. My heart bursts open with joy from his words. The sadness that has occupied the hollow part of my chest vanishes for the moment and is filled with pure love. He pulls away leaving one hand on my back and uses the other to wipe my tears.

"I was so scared. I don't know if I will be a good dad. My early childhood was so fucked up that I don't know how I'm going to do it. At the time that's all I could think about. I didn't think about how I have the most beautiful perfect woman carrying my child that won't let me fail." I sniffle loudly and more tears fall. "But I failed you. When you needed me the most, I failed you."

"Christian," I hiccup out.

"Shh, don't say anything. We have plenty of time to talk later. I just want to take you home." He rubs my back with his thumb. "Will you please come home with me?"

I nod. As mad as I am at him, the distance isn't what I want right now. I want to be near him. Hell, I NEED to be near him. I can be mad at him more later. Right now, all I want is to be embraced in his arms. I didn't realize how much I have missed him. He gives me his boyish grin and his hand on my cheek digs into my hair and pulls my face to him. He places his lips on mine with such hunger. He pulls away and I feel like I lost all the air from my lungs. I want to pull him back to my lips.

"Later," he whispers. "I will shower you with kisses once I have you home." His eyes lock on mine. "Whatever you will allow." I pull him closer and lean my head on his chest.

"We will see." I say. He places a kiss to the top of my head while smoothing out my hair.

"Whatever you want."

"Hey, Christian?"

"Yes, baby?"

"I don't feel very well." Then all the sudden my whole body goes limp in his arms and the world around me is swallowed by black.

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 **Let me know what you think! New Chapter soon, currently working on it**

 **3-A**


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